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hey everyone

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welcome to ufo hub live stream so today

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i have a very special guest here

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in person sitting right across from me

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hey nathan how are you good how are you

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anon thank you for having me on the show

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today's show is pretty much going to be

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about um

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psychedelics and i want to cover as much

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as i possibly can

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with uh these uh uh two friends of mine

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the other one is on telegram right now

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i'll introduce him in

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in a minute but the whole point of this

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show is to basically

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uh give you a perspective and as much

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detail as you possibly can

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what different experiences on different

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things have uh

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done for us individually and on some

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occasion i don't know if they're

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they specifically remember it but also

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um

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uh collectively while we were i guess on

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these

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certain journeys together so there's

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certain things i want to tell you right

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now that what we want to cover so that

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you're not guessing of what

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what we will eventually go through so at

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one point or another we're going to go

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through

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salvia dmt weed

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hawaiian baby woodrow seats um lsd and

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uh what was the other ayahuasca there

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you go

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and um it's psilocybin and psilocybin

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mushrooms right

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and so and then besides that basically

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want to cover

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uh stigma of the psychedelics um

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you know basically do the experiences

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differ from person person

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what are the general um lessons to be

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applied

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and will you always see beings

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during these certain journeys um are

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they different uh dimension or

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hallucinations basically the things that

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that are being experienced and so

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you'll kind of hear different points of

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views from each one of us

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and then um is it always a positive or

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negative experience

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so uh let me see here rick uh

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say hello please uh welcome i'm glad you

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you were able to join us today

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yeah thank you it's good to be with you

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awesome well uh so rick um i figured

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since i

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already shifted on you uh just uh please

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tell me just a little bit about you and

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maybe just a

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connection between you and i if you can

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keep it short and then i'll shift over

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to to nathan

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sure yeah um so right now i work as an

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online english teacher

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i teach english to children in china and

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that's given me an

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opportunity to live abroad i've always

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loved living in

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other countries where they don't speak

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the same language i do

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um i fell in love with like colombia and

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south america when i traveled to peru to

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do ayahuasca

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uh and i ended up loving colombia so i

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stayed in colombia for

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like well i went back and forth between

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there for the last couple of years

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um so i got done living there in the

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last year and a half um

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and i've been able to work and live

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there doing that uh

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and then of course i met adnan i guess

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towards the end of my college years

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and we became really good friends you

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know over you know just everything we

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talked about and began our psychedelic

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journeys together so

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that's where this all begins pretty much

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let's be short

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simple so nathan please introduce

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yourself and

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kind of make a connection to how you and

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i know each other

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hello i'm nathan nathan busher i work in

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i.t i'm a small business owner

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i've met met anon actually had a johnny

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appleseed project

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if anybody's familiar with that and

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since then we immediately hit it off you

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know we

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knew we had a lot of things in

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connection in common and um

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yeah and i i do have some experience

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with psychedelics

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and and i'd like to share them with

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everybody

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let's i guess figure it out instead of

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us going into the details

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about each one for right now let's i

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want to start out with basically the

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first thing which was the

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stigma of psychedelics so generally

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i found when it comes to you know

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psychedelics that people

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some but somehow create this hierarchy

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of validation so only

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if you were awake only if you were

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not drunk only if you saw it and heard

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it with your own eyes and ears

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or smelled it or tasted an occasion only

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then is it a valid experience

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you know and then everything else be

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below that it's

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pretty much lessened you know and

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depends on how far down the line you go

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you know with alcohol and other

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inhabitants

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or inhibitants yeah it's the word i'm

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looking for

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you know only then is it basically then

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um

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sort of like yeah well it's you could

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have hallucinated it's not

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not just you know it's basically the

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stigma of it is that somehow it's not

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valid

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and so that's what i what i wanted to

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approach what do you

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what would you say about that yes

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yes basically yeah i agree that

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originally when you mentioned that

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topic i thought you meant more the

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stigma of its legality

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it's uh it's uh if it's safe or not

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um but you're absolutely right is it

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quantifiable i understand what you're

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saying and and they want

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you know you talk to people like mufon

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who they want to be able to measure it

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they want to be able to taste it they

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want to be able to

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use their gizmos and their gadgets to

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you know produce recordable results

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uh but you know what is it real to the

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person the experiencer is that

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and my point that i made that is

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i think it's valid if your takeaway is

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valid what what did you learn from the

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experience

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um whether positive or negative if you

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learn something if you can take

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something away from that experience then

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who's to say it's not valid who's to say

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what you experienced

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isn't uh isn't

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you know your conscious like in your

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consciousness

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it's yes it's it's it's real so but i do

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agree there is a stigma there

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rick um any thoughts um regarding that

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yeah um well i mean i think it's there's

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a good reason why there's a stigma

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behind it i mean it is

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it's also scary because i think a lot of

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people that have never done it before i

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mean it's it's made fun of too i mean

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for example mushrooms are made to look

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very scary like i remember seeing

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something on what was it i think it was

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like family guy

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where uh like the kid eats mushrooms and

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then like sees a bunch of like crazy

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scary things people are getting killed

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and stuff you know so like

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these things have also been betrayed in

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the media as being bad

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very very bad kind of like the movie

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reefer madness and what it did with uh

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with with marijuana you know um but the

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truth is like

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because people most people have

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experience with either drinking

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alcohol or smoking weed like they

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associate their experiences with those

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things

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uh with with like mushrooms for example

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so they just see these things like oh

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though bro i saw like dragons and stuff

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and that's what people think

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until like i had my first you know

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mushroom trip and it was like

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nothing like that at all well we were

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even close to being like that

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um but it is it is going into a

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psychedelic experience like

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my first one was um it was salvia

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it can be very unnerving because you

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feel it you feel

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like sensations and see things in your

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reality gets bent

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nothing like what you would experience

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in with alcohol or

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i don't even think with marijuana

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necessarily so the stigma

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i think there's there's a good reason

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for why there's a stigma

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but when it comes to like are you

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experiencing something real or not are

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you experiencing a hallucination

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like in my personal experience there

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were a lot of things i felt like

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i was just made more aware of that was

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like the crazy thing with the

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the obvious shift i felt in my

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perception but i never

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actually felt like the perception i had

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was like necessarily something foreign

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it was always like i feel like i'm i've

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always known this

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but like i wasn't like as aware of it

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during my waking life

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uh that maybe there's certain barriers

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and things that are being brought down

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you know at least like through mushrooms

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and when i started reading

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scientifically why that might actually

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be the case there's science to prove

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that

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reduces activity in parts of the brain

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and allows other parts of your brain

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that are less dominant to

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to be active so that in itself kind of

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explains

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scientifically why somebody might feel

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like they have a valid experience or a

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different takeaway than what they had

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before they took

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all right thank you rick so that was

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rick

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for those who just kind of turned in uh

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tuning in

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this is us basically kind of um

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being plopped into a whole new stream i

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had original screens

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scheduled we started out with the title

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and everything and

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we did introductions and then we were

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very badly of sync

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and by me trying to restart it or reset

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it it basically

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disconnected there and when i started a

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new stream it started on a new video so

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you kind of

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we had just started so you haven't you

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know basically you haven't um

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missed anything but basically today's

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we're supposed to be our psychedelics

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and i have

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um uh the all three of my good friends

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with me today

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uh one obviously over telegram nathan um

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on

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sitting right across from me and also

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very first time in

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in person in the studio that i have

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actually somebody who i can talk to

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so we wanted to uh just cover uh these

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different

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aspects of psychedelics and try to give

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you as much detail as possible about

285
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them

286
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this is and i had a disclaimer earlier

287
00:10:09,030 --> 00:10:07,760
and when we first started out so i have

288
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to say it verbally

289
00:10:13,829 --> 00:10:12,640
um please check your local federal and

290
00:10:17,030 --> 00:10:13,839
state laws

291
00:10:20,230 --> 00:10:17,040
do not try this at home you know and

292
00:10:20,550 --> 00:10:20,240
basically uh be responsible so this is

293
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just

294
00:10:23,590 --> 00:10:22,640
us telling you a story this is not to

295
00:10:26,150 --> 00:10:23,600
encourage you

296
00:10:27,269 --> 00:10:26,160
you know this is just simply um the

297
00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:27,279
experiences and how

298
00:10:32,230 --> 00:10:30,240
these different um uh uh i guess

299
00:10:33,910 --> 00:10:32,240
journeys have shaped our lives so

300
00:10:35,590 --> 00:10:33,920
i'm just kind of putting it down a

301
00:10:37,509 --> 00:10:35,600
nutshell for youtube about before we

302
00:10:39,910 --> 00:10:37,519
continue on what this is about

303
00:10:40,630 --> 00:10:39,920
so um anyway just want to give you a

304
00:10:42,870 --> 00:10:40,640
little uh

305
00:10:45,990 --> 00:10:42,880
context and background information so

306
00:10:48,550 --> 00:10:46,000
the next thing that i want to

307
00:10:51,110 --> 00:10:48,560
i want to cover and i had it all ready

308
00:10:53,750 --> 00:10:51,120
as well on my

309
00:10:54,470 --> 00:10:53,760
my little paper here so we're talking

310
00:10:57,350 --> 00:10:54,480
about the

311
00:10:58,710 --> 00:10:57,360
the stigma that was the the main part

312
00:10:59,750 --> 00:10:58,720
but we're also going to go into some of

313
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the other stuff

314
00:11:03,350 --> 00:11:02,160
so we're talking about different

315
00:11:06,710 --> 00:11:03,360
different experiences

316
00:11:07,269 --> 00:11:06,720
so at one point or another we were all

317
00:11:10,310 --> 00:11:07,279
together

318
00:11:11,750 --> 00:11:10,320
in a room and we had i want to say some

319
00:11:13,269 --> 00:11:11,760
collective experiences

320
00:11:15,190 --> 00:11:13,279
i don't know if you guys were aware of

321
00:11:16,069 --> 00:11:15,200
it you know or whatever we might get

322
00:11:18,949 --> 00:11:16,079
into that

323
00:11:20,150 --> 00:11:18,959
but um uh generally i find that

324
00:11:22,710 --> 00:11:20,160
different experiences

325
00:11:23,910 --> 00:11:22,720
uh differ for for different people

326
00:11:27,110 --> 00:11:23,920
because it's kind of like

327
00:11:29,509 --> 00:11:27,120
um tuned to you about what it is going

328
00:11:32,710 --> 00:11:29,519
on with you what's going on in your life

329
00:11:34,550 --> 00:11:32,720
um that's just my perception of

330
00:11:37,590 --> 00:11:34,560
from from this so what do you think

331
00:11:40,710 --> 00:11:39,910
the collective experiences or just no

332
00:11:42,389 --> 00:11:40,720
just about

333
00:11:43,910 --> 00:11:42,399
uh you know this is different from

334
00:11:46,069 --> 00:11:43,920
person to person it's absolutely

335
00:11:49,269 --> 00:11:46,079
personal there's there's no denying

336
00:11:51,190 --> 00:11:49,279
uh psychedelics even weed

337
00:11:53,190 --> 00:11:51,200
if you're if you're if you're open to it

338
00:11:53,829 --> 00:11:53,200
a lot of people smoke weed and they sort

339
00:11:55,910 --> 00:11:53,839
of shut off

340
00:11:57,110 --> 00:11:55,920
i smoke weed that activates me like it

341
00:11:58,790 --> 00:11:57,120
turns on my my

342
00:12:00,470 --> 00:11:58,800
thinking capabilities like amplifies

343
00:12:01,910 --> 00:12:00,480
them but um

344
00:12:03,829 --> 00:12:01,920
with psychedelics it's very personal

345
00:12:05,430 --> 00:12:03,839
it's usually and then

346
00:12:06,710 --> 00:12:05,440
i have to assume because the way

347
00:12:07,990 --> 00:12:06,720
hollywood portrays it and then there's

348
00:12:09,430 --> 00:12:08,000
also a lot of people out there trying to

349
00:12:09,990 --> 00:12:09,440
abuse these things but i personally

350
00:12:11,350 --> 00:12:10,000
don't see

351
00:12:12,790 --> 00:12:11,360
it how it's possible to abuse

352
00:12:13,269 --> 00:12:12,800
psychedelics like just to use them for

353
00:12:14,870 --> 00:12:13,279
fun

354
00:12:16,470 --> 00:12:14,880
but maybe that's because i'm a spiritual

355
00:12:19,269 --> 00:12:16,480
seeker you know

356
00:12:21,750 --> 00:12:19,279
just just just from the start uh so

357
00:12:23,430 --> 00:12:21,760
whenever i take psychedelics it's always

358
00:12:25,750 --> 00:12:23,440
it's always very it's a learning

359
00:12:26,150 --> 00:12:25,760
experience it's it's very personal i

360
00:12:28,310 --> 00:12:26,160
mean

361
00:12:29,350 --> 00:12:28,320
it you know because it's i guess it's a

362
00:12:31,350 --> 00:12:29,360
lot of it's in your head

363
00:12:32,470 --> 00:12:31,360
and it's uh there's no hidden corners or

364
00:12:35,990 --> 00:12:32,480
hidden depths

365
00:12:37,750 --> 00:12:36,000
that are untouchable and and i usually

366
00:12:39,030 --> 00:12:37,760
come out of it learning a lot and like i

367
00:12:40,790 --> 00:12:39,040
said let's go back to that that

368
00:12:42,230 --> 00:12:40,800
disclaimer we're not condoning the use

369
00:12:44,310 --> 00:12:42,240
of psychedelics i'm definitely not

370
00:12:45,910 --> 00:12:44,320
like advocating it or saying everybody

371
00:12:48,629 --> 00:12:45,920
has to do it i'm just saying

372
00:12:49,509 --> 00:12:48,639
it there were experiences that helped me

373
00:12:51,990 --> 00:12:49,519
immensely

374
00:12:53,430 --> 00:12:52,000
and actually i don't use them anymore i

375
00:12:55,110 --> 00:12:53,440
i've gotten i've come full circle i

376
00:12:57,350 --> 00:12:55,120
don't use any drugs anymore

377
00:12:59,030 --> 00:12:57,360
um oh wait a minute if you consider weed

378
00:13:00,629 --> 00:12:59,040
a drug okay i do i do smoke a little

379
00:13:03,910 --> 00:13:00,639
weed from time to time but

380
00:13:06,550 --> 00:13:03,920
um it's very personal experience and it

381
00:13:07,990 --> 00:13:06,560
can be rewarding um

382
00:13:09,430 --> 00:13:08,000
i don't think it's time we're going to

383
00:13:10,949 --> 00:13:09,440
have another topic here where we went

384
00:13:12,870 --> 00:13:10,959
into some personal experiences

385
00:13:14,949 --> 00:13:12,880
we will eventually this is just to cover

386
00:13:17,110 --> 00:13:14,959
these basics first gotcha gotcha

387
00:13:18,150 --> 00:13:17,120
uh okay well yeah that so yes i agree

388
00:13:21,190 --> 00:13:18,160
it's very sober

389
00:13:23,190 --> 00:13:21,200
rick uh uh what do you think

390
00:13:25,030 --> 00:13:23,200
i mean like like did we share like do

391
00:13:26,310 --> 00:13:25,040
you think like we were interconnected or

392
00:13:27,509 --> 00:13:26,320
something during an experience we had

393
00:13:29,030 --> 00:13:27,519
well i mean

394
00:13:30,870 --> 00:13:29,040
basically would you agree with the

395
00:13:33,350 --> 00:13:30,880
premise that most of the time

396
00:13:33,990 --> 00:13:33,360
it will differ from person to person

397
00:13:36,550 --> 00:13:34,000
absolutely

398
00:13:37,990 --> 00:13:36,560
i mean especially during an ayahuasca

399
00:13:39,030 --> 00:13:38,000
ceremony you know at least a good

400
00:13:40,790 --> 00:13:39,040
healing center

401
00:13:42,150 --> 00:13:40,800
they're very respectful of that they

402
00:13:43,829 --> 00:13:42,160
recognize that you shouldn't have too

403
00:13:45,430 --> 00:13:43,839
many people in one group because there's

404
00:13:47,750 --> 00:13:45,440
ayahuasca centers that

405
00:13:49,750 --> 00:13:47,760
run groups of like hundreds of people um

406
00:13:51,590 --> 00:13:49,760
but if you're in a good ayahuasca center

407
00:13:53,910 --> 00:13:51,600
you know that the person who runs it

408
00:13:54,790 --> 00:13:53,920
you know is very they're they're very

409
00:13:56,790 --> 00:13:54,800
respected

410
00:13:58,150 --> 00:13:56,800
perspective of everybody's space you

411
00:14:00,069 --> 00:13:58,160
know so nobody is

412
00:14:01,910 --> 00:14:00,079
to enter anybody's space during an

413
00:14:02,629 --> 00:14:01,920
ayahuasca ayahuasca's experience if

414
00:14:05,030 --> 00:14:02,639
there's like

415
00:14:06,230 --> 00:14:05,040
you know six to 12 people because people

416
00:14:07,590 --> 00:14:06,240
have their own past their own

417
00:14:08,629 --> 00:14:07,600
experiences and they go through

418
00:14:10,310 --> 00:14:08,639
different things

419
00:14:11,509 --> 00:14:10,320
so like while one person might have a

420
00:14:12,790 --> 00:14:11,519
really good experience where

421
00:14:14,310 --> 00:14:12,800
everything's just you know

422
00:14:15,590 --> 00:14:14,320
full of love and they just want to get

423
00:14:17,110 --> 00:14:15,600
up and dance there might be somebody

424
00:14:18,710 --> 00:14:17,120
else who's crying or another peace

425
00:14:20,870 --> 00:14:18,720
person who's throwing up

426
00:14:23,030 --> 00:14:20,880
um and all of this comes from you know

427
00:14:25,030 --> 00:14:23,040
their past or current situations they're

428
00:14:26,710 --> 00:14:25,040
experiencing it's just like life

429
00:14:27,990 --> 00:14:26,720
everybody's on their own journey

430
00:14:29,910 --> 00:14:28,000
so they're going to have their own

431
00:14:32,949 --> 00:14:29,920
journey during a psychedelic experience

432
00:14:37,350 --> 00:14:36,310
right well um nathan i don't know i

433
00:14:40,790 --> 00:14:37,360
don't want to keep

434
00:14:43,269 --> 00:14:40,800
keep jumping around but i wanted to um i

435
00:14:46,310 --> 00:14:43,279
lost my little

436
00:14:47,750 --> 00:14:46,320
little tiny list here so basically

437
00:14:49,829 --> 00:14:47,760
i want to i don't want to jump

438
00:14:53,829 --> 00:14:49,839
immediately into into beings

439
00:14:57,269 --> 00:14:53,839
but this place that you found yourself

440
00:14:59,509 --> 00:14:57,279
to to be going what would you think

441
00:15:01,590 --> 00:14:59,519
that that is is it is it a different

442
00:15:03,189 --> 00:15:01,600
dimension or is it just a hallucination

443
00:15:04,790 --> 00:15:03,199
as everyone else would describe it

444
00:15:07,189 --> 00:15:04,800
i guess that question i guess how i

445
00:15:10,150 --> 00:15:07,199
answer that question depends on

446
00:15:11,829 --> 00:15:10,160
what you took and how much you took like

447
00:15:12,629 --> 00:15:11,839
because if you just eat a little bit of

448
00:15:14,069 --> 00:15:12,639
mushrooms

449
00:15:16,069 --> 00:15:14,079
you can it can be very spiritually

450
00:15:18,230 --> 00:15:16,079
rewarding but i don't feel like you ever

451
00:15:19,509 --> 00:15:18,240
leave this place it just alters your

452
00:15:20,310 --> 00:15:19,519
consciousness enough that you can

453
00:15:21,750 --> 00:15:20,320
perceive

454
00:15:23,990 --> 00:15:21,760
things that may not have been unaware to

455
00:15:25,430 --> 00:15:24,000
you um now if you eat a boatload which

456
00:15:27,910 --> 00:15:25,440
i've never done on mushrooms

457
00:15:30,310 --> 00:15:27,920
but i know a nun has but like other

458
00:15:31,590 --> 00:15:30,320
drugs like dmt or salvia

459
00:15:33,110 --> 00:15:31,600
it doesn't seem like i don't know it

460
00:15:33,749 --> 00:15:33,120
doesn't even matter how little you do

461
00:15:36,629 --> 00:15:33,759
you're in a

462
00:15:39,350 --> 00:15:36,639
you're transported to another place very

463
00:15:42,629 --> 00:15:39,360
briefly but you are you are transported

464
00:15:44,550 --> 00:15:42,639
um what other and then there's

465
00:15:46,230 --> 00:15:44,560
some i actually did a couple that you

466
00:15:46,870 --> 00:15:46,240
guys haven't done which i would not

467
00:15:49,910 --> 00:15:46,880
recommend

468
00:15:54,150 --> 00:15:52,790
oh well lsd i guess for me usually

469
00:15:56,310 --> 00:15:54,160
there's always a period of time where

470
00:15:57,670 --> 00:15:56,320
you seem like you feel like you've lost

471
00:15:59,829 --> 00:15:57,680
complete touch with this reality and

472
00:16:01,350 --> 00:15:59,839
you're experiencing another reality but

473
00:16:03,269 --> 00:16:01,360
it's nothing like hollywood that's for

474
00:16:04,629 --> 00:16:03,279
sure nothing like nothing like the the

475
00:16:06,389 --> 00:16:04,639
cartoons portray you know we're not

476
00:16:08,710 --> 00:16:06,399
homer simpson in the in the desert on

477
00:16:10,230 --> 00:16:08,720
peyote buttons but um so what

478
00:16:12,230 --> 00:16:10,240
does that answer your question or what

479
00:16:14,069 --> 00:16:12,240
exactly no that was it just

480
00:16:16,550 --> 00:16:14,079
we're not going into details right now

481
00:16:18,790 --> 00:16:16,560
we'll just simply uh basically

482
00:16:20,790 --> 00:16:18,800
they go get back on me we just wanted to

483
00:16:21,189 --> 00:16:20,800
cover these main points to kind of go

484
00:16:23,910 --> 00:16:21,199
through

485
00:16:25,910 --> 00:16:23,920
to them first and then uh once we get

486
00:16:28,870 --> 00:16:25,920
them covered then we can go into the

487
00:16:30,470 --> 00:16:28,880
individual uh psychedelic and individual

488
00:16:31,030 --> 00:16:30,480
individual trips and lessons learned

489
00:16:32,629 --> 00:16:31,040
from that

490
00:16:34,069 --> 00:16:32,639
so rick i wanted to ask you next

491
00:16:36,310 --> 00:16:34,079
basically so

492
00:16:38,550 --> 00:16:36,320
you know would you say it's a different

493
00:16:41,829 --> 00:16:38,560
dimension or is it just a hallucination

494
00:16:44,710 --> 00:16:41,839
what is your um your thought on that

495
00:16:46,470 --> 00:16:44,720
you know i don't know how to i don't

496
00:16:48,389 --> 00:16:46,480
know if i can really answer that like

497
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:48,399
you know is it just a hallucination i

498
00:16:51,670 --> 00:16:49,519
mean

499
00:16:53,269 --> 00:16:51,680
i would say that it's not i also want to

500
00:16:54,710 --> 00:16:53,279
say was i going anywhere

501
00:16:56,550 --> 00:16:54,720
i mean i think actually during a

502
00:16:58,629 --> 00:16:56,560
psychedelic experience like

503
00:17:00,629 --> 00:16:58,639
the big question becomes like who are

504
00:17:01,670 --> 00:17:00,639
you like because there's always a

505
00:17:03,990 --> 00:17:01,680
concept of you

506
00:17:05,829 --> 00:17:04,000
and like i had experiences yeah where i

507
00:17:07,029 --> 00:17:05,839
felt like maybe i personally went

508
00:17:09,590 --> 00:17:07,039
somewhere else but like

509
00:17:11,350 --> 00:17:09,600
my body was still here you know so like

510
00:17:13,510 --> 00:17:11,360
the question becomes who are you

511
00:17:14,789 --> 00:17:13,520
so i don't know i mean i think the same

512
00:17:16,230 --> 00:17:14,799
question could be you know you could

513
00:17:17,350 --> 00:17:16,240
almost apply the same question what

514
00:17:19,270 --> 00:17:17,360
happens when you die

515
00:17:20,710 --> 00:17:19,280
i don't know if you go to the same place

516
00:17:22,549 --> 00:17:20,720
when you die as if you go to a place

517
00:17:23,990 --> 00:17:22,559
like where i went on salvia but

518
00:17:26,230 --> 00:17:24,000
i can definitely tell you that on my

519
00:17:28,470 --> 00:17:26,240
salvia trip which is the first one i had

520
00:17:30,070 --> 00:17:28,480
i was not seeing what my eyes were

521
00:17:32,070 --> 00:17:30,080
seeing here

522
00:17:33,430 --> 00:17:32,080
so i don't know i don't know what that

523
00:17:36,470 --> 00:17:33,440
is right

524
00:17:39,909 --> 00:17:36,480
well so while i didn't you know have you

525
00:17:41,990 --> 00:17:39,919
um basically you know talking let's move

526
00:17:43,510 --> 00:17:42,000
on to the next point here so

527
00:17:45,190 --> 00:17:43,520
how would you generally rate your

528
00:17:48,070 --> 00:17:45,200
experiences uh

529
00:17:49,029 --> 00:17:48,080
positive negative bit to both uh what

530
00:17:50,630 --> 00:17:49,039
would you say

531
00:17:52,470 --> 00:17:50,640
i could start like i have positive or

532
00:17:55,350 --> 00:17:52,480
negative i think i've had both

533
00:17:56,390 --> 00:17:55,360
um i've had both i mean i guess i could

534
00:17:59,510 --> 00:17:56,400
say at the end of it

535
00:18:00,070 --> 00:17:59,520
even a negative experience is actually a

536
00:18:01,990 --> 00:18:00,080
positive

537
00:18:03,909 --> 00:18:02,000
one because there's things that you

538
00:18:05,510 --> 00:18:03,919
learn about the the

539
00:18:07,029 --> 00:18:05,520
negative experience that you had usually

540
00:18:10,230 --> 00:18:07,039
finally oh there was a reason

541
00:18:11,750 --> 00:18:10,240
i experienced that um but i that's the

542
00:18:13,190 --> 00:18:11,760
thing i mean i think it's also depends

543
00:18:15,510 --> 00:18:13,200
on like why you're approaching it like i

544
00:18:17,430 --> 00:18:15,520
feel like you really need to understand

545
00:18:19,110 --> 00:18:17,440
psychedelics like or at least understand

546
00:18:21,110 --> 00:18:19,120
as much as you can about them before you

547
00:18:23,270 --> 00:18:21,120
even attempt like if you were to even

548
00:18:24,950 --> 00:18:23,280
consider doing something like that you

549
00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:24,960
need to understand like it's

550
00:18:29,110 --> 00:18:27,200
it's not it's not a walk in the park

551
00:18:29,909 --> 00:18:29,120
like the iowa the guy at the ios build

552
00:18:31,029 --> 00:18:29,919
center said that

553
00:18:32,630 --> 00:18:31,039
during our meeting he's like you know

554
00:18:33,990 --> 00:18:32,640
he's like so you know if you came here

555
00:18:35,350 --> 00:18:34,000
thinking that you were you know

556
00:18:36,870 --> 00:18:35,360
going to have a party or this was going

557
00:18:38,070 --> 00:18:36,880
to be something fun you're in for a big

558
00:18:39,669 --> 00:18:38,080
freaking surprise

559
00:18:41,270 --> 00:18:39,679
and he's absolutely right about that

560
00:18:44,070 --> 00:18:41,280
it's not a walk in the park and

561
00:18:45,270 --> 00:18:44,080
like nathan said it's for learning so

562
00:18:46,870 --> 00:18:45,280
you know just like you have some

563
00:18:47,990 --> 00:18:46,880
teachers that are really really mean to

564
00:18:49,510 --> 00:18:48,000
you sometimes

565
00:18:51,270 --> 00:18:49,520
you know that's what an experience can

566
00:18:51,909 --> 00:18:51,280
be like too you can be it can be mean to

567
00:18:56,549 --> 00:18:51,919
you

568
00:18:58,230 --> 00:18:56,559
and be in an environment where

569
00:19:00,950 --> 00:18:58,240
you're you're safe to handle that that's

570
00:19:05,190 --> 00:19:03,350
so nathan what do you think well i agree

571
00:19:07,750 --> 00:19:05,200
with what rick said 100

572
00:19:09,430 --> 00:19:07,760
yeah i mean you can have uh what you

573
00:19:10,070 --> 00:19:09,440
perceive as both negative and positive

574
00:19:13,110 --> 00:19:10,080
experiences

575
00:19:14,870 --> 00:19:13,120
on the same in the same experience in

576
00:19:17,190 --> 00:19:14,880
the same trip on the same substance

577
00:19:19,110 --> 00:19:17,200
it can go back and forth several times

578
00:19:20,150 --> 00:19:19,120
um and sometimes it can be absolutely

579
00:19:22,470 --> 00:19:20,160
terrifying but

580
00:19:23,190 --> 00:19:22,480
yeah rick rick is right like usually

581
00:19:25,350 --> 00:19:23,200
when you

582
00:19:27,350 --> 00:19:25,360
in the middle of it it's the most

583
00:19:29,510 --> 00:19:27,360
terrifying thing you've ever experienced

584
00:19:31,430 --> 00:19:29,520
uh and then you realize later that it's

585
00:19:34,150 --> 00:19:31,440
like okay well now

586
00:19:35,669 --> 00:19:34,160
now i realize i i'm really grateful for

587
00:19:35,990 --> 00:19:35,679
having seen that experience to whatever

588
00:19:43,110 --> 00:19:36,000
the

589
00:19:43,990 --> 00:19:43,120
you don't actually see anything or if

590
00:19:45,510 --> 00:19:44,000
you do it's

591
00:19:47,350 --> 00:19:45,520
it's it's secondary to the to the

592
00:19:49,270 --> 00:19:47,360
feeling of it uh

593
00:19:50,870 --> 00:19:49,280
so yeah i agree it's it's both positive

594
00:19:52,710 --> 00:19:50,880
and and negative

595
00:19:54,310 --> 00:19:52,720
and and though i'm not condoning drug

596
00:19:56,549 --> 00:19:54,320
use i'd say overall

597
00:19:57,510 --> 00:19:56,559
uh it's the takeaway that i've taken

598
00:19:59,830 --> 00:19:57,520
from it has been

599
00:20:01,190 --> 00:19:59,840
rewarding to my life like the decisions

600
00:20:03,190 --> 00:20:01,200
that i've been able to make

601
00:20:04,390 --> 00:20:03,200
due to the things that were experienced

602
00:20:07,510 --> 00:20:04,400
on psychedelics

603
00:20:11,110 --> 00:20:07,520
have been uh valuable to me okay

604
00:20:12,870 --> 00:20:11,120
so i guess let's get into

605
00:20:14,230 --> 00:20:12,880
the part that you both keep itching to

606
00:20:16,390 --> 00:20:14,240
get into and so

607
00:20:19,590 --> 00:20:16,400
i figured uh everyone else would you

608
00:20:21,909 --> 00:20:19,600
know want to want to hear it so

609
00:20:24,070 --> 00:20:21,919
one of my very first experiences was

610
00:20:28,310 --> 00:20:24,080
with i don't know that nathan was there

611
00:20:29,990 --> 00:20:28,320
but rick i believe you were there um and

612
00:20:31,590 --> 00:20:30,000
we were what was that again i keep

613
00:20:34,070 --> 00:20:31,600
forgetting the salvia divinorum thank

614
00:20:37,110 --> 00:20:34,080
you salt it's actually a sage plant

615
00:20:39,190 --> 00:20:37,120
okay well anyway so let me

616
00:20:40,390 --> 00:20:39,200
so let's let's discuss some details so

617
00:20:42,710 --> 00:20:40,400
people know what we're talking about

618
00:20:44,390 --> 00:20:42,720
what what what happened so

619
00:20:46,830 --> 00:20:44,400
nathan i don't think was there but rick

620
00:20:48,470 --> 00:20:46,840
was so maybe just rick and i can discuss

621
00:20:51,430 --> 00:20:48,480
it

622
00:20:51,909 --> 00:20:51,440
the obviously before that i had no idea

623
00:20:53,590 --> 00:20:51,919
of

624
00:20:55,190 --> 00:20:53,600
any kind you know i was just

625
00:20:56,630 --> 00:20:55,200
straight-laced let's just

626
00:20:58,630 --> 00:20:56,640
you know do everything by the book the

627
00:21:00,310 --> 00:20:58,640
devil that was that was it that was my

628
00:21:03,510 --> 00:21:00,320
life

629
00:21:06,310 --> 00:21:03,520
when i guess when i first took it in

630
00:21:06,950 --> 00:21:06,320
you know the first thing that that that

631
00:21:10,310 --> 00:21:06,960
happened

632
00:21:12,950 --> 00:21:10,320
was that i immediately was

633
00:21:14,950 --> 00:21:12,960
you know basically still here but my

634
00:21:18,310 --> 00:21:14,960
mind was off the sudden

635
00:21:19,350 --> 00:21:18,320
seeing everything like a projection or a

636
00:21:21,990 --> 00:21:19,360
picture

637
00:21:22,789 --> 00:21:22,000
that you know the furthest away and the

638
00:21:26,149 --> 00:21:22,799
closest thing

639
00:21:28,070 --> 00:21:26,159
was all on the same same plane

640
00:21:29,510 --> 00:21:28,080
and so yes you could say oh your eyes a

641
00:21:31,190 --> 00:21:29,520
lot you know you somehow

642
00:21:33,510 --> 00:21:31,200
something happened to your eyes and you

643
00:21:36,230 --> 00:21:33,520
didn't have that depth perception

644
00:21:37,830 --> 00:21:36,240
but my experience at that time was that

645
00:21:40,630 --> 00:21:37,840
i wasn't seeing

646
00:21:42,310 --> 00:21:40,640
uh with my eyes you know and it was

647
00:21:44,070 --> 00:21:42,320
actually it was more like seeing with

648
00:21:45,909 --> 00:21:44,080
something more than just you know

649
00:21:47,830 --> 00:21:45,919
even though my eyes were open i had the

650
00:21:49,590 --> 00:21:47,840
experience you know you could

651
00:21:51,909 --> 00:21:49,600
you know there was a kind of like the

652
00:21:55,029 --> 00:21:51,919
first splash into the

653
00:21:57,750 --> 00:21:55,039
the ocean of that that psychedelics are

654
00:21:58,789 --> 00:21:57,760
you know to just kind of like what in

655
00:22:00,630 --> 00:21:58,799
the world is this

656
00:22:01,909 --> 00:22:00,640
it was a bit unnerving because we're so

657
00:22:03,830 --> 00:22:01,919
used to about

658
00:22:05,510 --> 00:22:03,840
you know seeing things and interacting

659
00:22:06,710 --> 00:22:05,520
with stuff when all of that kind of

660
00:22:08,870 --> 00:22:06,720
falls aside

661
00:22:10,390 --> 00:22:08,880
and it's all almost like a like a

662
00:22:13,510 --> 00:22:10,400
holograph around you

663
00:22:14,390 --> 00:22:13,520
um you know it was unnerving but i can't

664
00:22:17,190 --> 00:22:14,400
emphasize

665
00:22:18,149 --> 00:22:17,200
enough and i did it kind of intuitively

666
00:22:21,270 --> 00:22:18,159
i just calmed

667
00:22:22,390 --> 00:22:21,280
down instead of freaking out what in the

668
00:22:25,270 --> 00:22:22,400
world is happening

669
00:22:26,630 --> 00:22:25,280
i just calm down and observe it observed

670
00:22:29,909 --> 00:22:26,640
it for what it was

671
00:22:30,470 --> 00:22:29,919
you know and so as subtle and quick as

672
00:22:33,350 --> 00:22:30,480
that was

673
00:22:34,149 --> 00:22:33,360
you know i basically just they kind of

674
00:22:36,549 --> 00:22:34,159
like kind of

675
00:22:37,270 --> 00:22:36,559
got me my first taste of like did you

676
00:22:39,350 --> 00:22:37,280
know

677
00:22:40,789 --> 00:22:39,360
wow there's really a whole new world out

678
00:22:43,110 --> 00:22:40,799
there that that

679
00:22:44,630 --> 00:22:43,120
i i wasn't aware of maybe some people

680
00:22:45,750 --> 00:22:44,640
are aware of out there but it was the

681
00:22:47,909 --> 00:22:45,760
first time for me

682
00:22:50,070 --> 00:22:47,919
you know and after that it became more

683
00:22:51,830 --> 00:22:50,080
intriguing not like oh let's do drugs

684
00:22:52,470 --> 00:22:51,840
all the time it wasn't it at all it was

685
00:22:56,149 --> 00:22:52,480
like

686
00:22:57,669 --> 00:22:56,159
um a specific lessons where moving

687
00:22:59,990 --> 00:22:57,679
forward from then on specific

688
00:23:01,990 --> 00:23:00,000
lessons were were learned but i want to

689
00:23:05,430 --> 00:23:02,000
get into it that far for now so

690
00:23:07,669 --> 00:23:05,440
that was my first experience ever

691
00:23:10,149 --> 00:23:07,679
regarding that so nathan i don't know

692
00:23:10,950 --> 00:23:10,159
that you had that specific experience so

693
00:23:13,350 --> 00:23:10,960
while we're still

694
00:23:14,789 --> 00:23:13,360
on on salvia i want to ask rick about it

695
00:23:16,310 --> 00:23:14,799
so rick

696
00:23:18,789 --> 00:23:16,320
can you tell me a little bit about yours

697
00:23:20,630 --> 00:23:18,799
please yeah well

698
00:23:22,230 --> 00:23:20,640
once once it was the first time i ever

699
00:23:24,710 --> 00:23:22,240
did any kind of psychedelic

700
00:23:26,630 --> 00:23:24,720
and you know salvia is debatedly one of

701
00:23:28,230 --> 00:23:26,640
the most potent psychedelics known so

702
00:23:31,669 --> 00:23:28,240
what a great thing to start with

703
00:23:34,390 --> 00:23:31,679
right i was really in for a surprise um

704
00:23:35,590 --> 00:23:34,400
but what what really blew my mind was

705
00:23:37,270 --> 00:23:35,600
that all of a sudden like

706
00:23:38,870 --> 00:23:37,280
i was really complaining because i i

707
00:23:39,909 --> 00:23:38,880
wasn't getting anything you know like

708
00:23:41,990 --> 00:23:39,919
you have to like

709
00:23:43,110 --> 00:23:42,000
like when you we were smoking it you

710
00:23:44,470 --> 00:23:43,120
know so you have to hold it in your

711
00:23:46,470 --> 00:23:44,480
lungs for a long time so remember

712
00:23:48,390 --> 00:23:46,480
nan's like oh i'm here again i'm go i'm

713
00:23:49,590 --> 00:23:48,400
not here i'm i'm gone i'm not

714
00:23:51,830 --> 00:23:49,600
and i was like i really want that

715
00:23:53,590 --> 00:23:51,840
experience so i like you know suck this

716
00:23:54,549 --> 00:23:53,600
stuff and i held it in for like 30

717
00:23:56,310 --> 00:23:54,559
seconds and i

718
00:23:57,830 --> 00:23:56,320
blew it out and like i was like starting

719
00:23:59,669 --> 00:23:57,840
to wonder like you know maybe this whole

720
00:23:59,990 --> 00:23:59,679
psychedelic thing is just a big like you

721
00:24:02,710 --> 00:24:00,000
know

722
00:24:04,390 --> 00:24:02,720
like joke you're like sorry i'm like i

723
00:24:05,750 --> 00:24:04,400
tried like these like dream herbs that

724
00:24:06,470 --> 00:24:05,760
didn't help me with dreaming so i'm

725
00:24:08,230 --> 00:24:06,480
sitting there like

726
00:24:09,990 --> 00:24:08,240
this is ridiculous i don't think

727
00:24:10,950 --> 00:24:10,000
psychedelics even do anything people are

728
00:24:13,029 --> 00:24:10,960
just making this stuff

729
00:24:13,990 --> 00:24:13,039
up and while i'm like you know going on

730
00:24:15,909 --> 00:24:14,000
and on and on

731
00:24:17,510 --> 00:24:15,919
i start noticing that the fire in front

732
00:24:20,230 --> 00:24:17,520
of me is starting to move

733
00:24:20,710 --> 00:24:20,240
and i felt like there was a hand pushing

734
00:24:27,909 --> 00:24:20,720
my

735
00:24:30,070 --> 00:24:27,919
and all of a sudden i was like oh no

736
00:24:31,029 --> 00:24:30,080
that's when i'm like i was like oh i

737
00:24:32,390 --> 00:24:31,039
wasn't ready for this

738
00:24:34,630 --> 00:24:32,400
and it was like a train that was

739
00:24:36,549 --> 00:24:34,640
starting to go full speed down a hill

740
00:24:38,070 --> 00:24:36,559
and i wanted to get off of it but there

741
00:24:40,470 --> 00:24:38,080
was no getting off of it

742
00:24:41,510 --> 00:24:40,480
and i was like here you go you wanted it

743
00:24:43,990 --> 00:24:41,520
here you go

744
00:24:45,590 --> 00:24:44,000
and like it i remember like everything

745
00:24:46,470 --> 00:24:45,600
like all of a sudden everything i was

746
00:24:48,630 --> 00:24:46,480
seeing

747
00:24:49,990 --> 00:24:48,640
like started to zoom out and became

748
00:24:52,310 --> 00:24:50,000
two-dimensional

749
00:24:54,149 --> 00:24:52,320
and i felt like i was standing in a room

750
00:24:54,710 --> 00:24:54,159
and everything i was looking at was a

751
00:24:58,070 --> 00:24:54,720
picture

752
00:24:59,590 --> 00:24:58,080
on a wall and i was like my life is a

753
00:25:01,350 --> 00:24:59,600
picture on a wall

754
00:25:03,430 --> 00:25:01,360
and like there was a voice that came

755
00:25:04,070 --> 00:25:03,440
over like yeah have you forgotten

756
00:25:05,430 --> 00:25:04,080
everything

757
00:25:07,350 --> 00:25:05,440
this whole time you've been trying to

758
00:25:09,029 --> 00:25:07,360
practice doing astral projection

759
00:25:10,950 --> 00:25:09,039
and leave your mind and all you ever had

760
00:25:12,470 --> 00:25:10,960
to do was look up and i looked up

761
00:25:14,710 --> 00:25:12,480
and the whole scene changed and i was

762
00:25:16,310 --> 00:25:14,720
like i saw this big ferris wheel like

763
00:25:18,149 --> 00:25:16,320
emerge out of the ground

764
00:25:19,590 --> 00:25:18,159
and i remember seeing this ferris wheel

765
00:25:20,789 --> 00:25:19,600
like that like being encouraged to get

766
00:25:22,149 --> 00:25:20,799
on the ferris wheel i'm like

767
00:25:24,070 --> 00:25:22,159
i'm not getting on that thing and the

768
00:25:25,590 --> 00:25:24,080
voice said too late you're already on it

769
00:25:28,630 --> 00:25:25,600
and i got buckled in this thing i was

770
00:25:30,390 --> 00:25:28,640
like oh my god that was like

771
00:25:32,390 --> 00:25:30,400
you know it launched me it started

772
00:25:32,710 --> 00:25:32,400
spinning really fast and it launched me

773
00:25:56,070 --> 00:25:32,720
like

774
00:25:57,830 --> 00:25:56,080
my i don't know maybe

775
00:25:59,430 --> 00:25:57,840
my ethereal self floating around and the

776
00:26:01,029 --> 00:25:59,440
voice is like showing me like

777
00:26:02,950 --> 00:26:01,039
all these different visors and it's

778
00:26:04,470 --> 00:26:02,960
telling me like you know look at all

779
00:26:06,230 --> 00:26:04,480
these visors see these are

780
00:26:07,830 --> 00:26:06,240
all the different possible lifetimes you

781
00:26:08,789 --> 00:26:07,840
could live and experience if you choose

782
00:26:10,470 --> 00:26:08,799
to and i was like

783
00:26:11,830 --> 00:26:10,480
well i don't want to experience those i

784
00:26:13,430 --> 00:26:11,840
need to go back to the one that i was

785
00:26:15,350 --> 00:26:13,440
experiencing and

786
00:26:17,269 --> 00:26:15,360
eventually i went through some like some

787
00:26:18,950 --> 00:26:17,279
time warp and i felt like i was laying

788
00:26:20,549 --> 00:26:18,960
on like a table

789
00:26:22,789 --> 00:26:20,559
and there were like three or four like

790
00:26:24,470 --> 00:26:22,799
children like standing over me and i

791
00:26:25,269 --> 00:26:24,480
felt like they knew me and i know who

792
00:26:27,909 --> 00:26:25,279
they were

793
00:26:29,269 --> 00:26:27,919
me and i was like kind of getting

794
00:26:30,710 --> 00:26:29,279
irritated because i'm like

795
00:26:32,470 --> 00:26:30,720
you know who are these children laughing

796
00:26:34,149 --> 00:26:32,480
at me like they've been watching me live

797
00:26:35,430 --> 00:26:34,159
this life on this like planet

798
00:26:36,630 --> 00:26:35,440
and they're just sitting here laughing

799
00:26:37,430 --> 00:26:36,640
at me like they don't even have the

800
00:26:39,669 --> 00:26:37,440
courage to like

801
00:26:41,590 --> 00:26:39,679
do what i've been doing like why am i

802
00:26:43,269 --> 00:26:41,600
here and like this voice said like

803
00:26:45,269 --> 00:26:43,279
have have you forgotten everything

804
00:26:47,190 --> 00:26:45,279
you've been asleep for 26 years

805
00:26:49,269 --> 00:26:47,200
and i was 26 years old at the time and i

806
00:26:50,390 --> 00:26:49,279
was like well i want to go back to sleep

807
00:26:51,590 --> 00:26:50,400
because i don't want

808
00:26:52,950 --> 00:26:51,600
to wake up in front of them while

809
00:26:53,990 --> 00:26:52,960
they're laughing send me back i have

810
00:26:55,830 --> 00:26:54,000
stuff to do and

811
00:26:57,430 --> 00:26:55,840
so eventually i had said like very well

812
00:26:57,909 --> 00:26:57,440
and it flushed me through and i remember

813
00:27:06,070 --> 00:26:57,919
like

814
00:27:07,510 --> 00:27:06,080
voice rick

815
00:27:09,269 --> 00:27:07,520
rick are you okay and i started kind of

816
00:27:11,590 --> 00:27:09,279
coming out of it like i'm almost back

817
00:27:13,350 --> 00:27:11,600
hold on i'm almost back and everything

818
00:27:15,190 --> 00:27:13,360
stopped for a minute and it said

819
00:27:16,710 --> 00:27:15,200
hey you're 12 years old you just fell

820
00:27:18,230 --> 00:27:16,720
off your bike and hit your head on the

821
00:27:19,750 --> 00:27:18,240
common ground which is like this little

822
00:27:21,430 --> 00:27:19,760
piece of land in our neighborhood

823
00:27:22,870 --> 00:27:21,440
which is a true thing i did i flew off

824
00:27:24,149 --> 00:27:22,880
my bike and hit my head

825
00:27:26,070 --> 00:27:24,159
and he said you just forgot where you

826
00:27:28,230 --> 00:27:26,080
were i was like oh and i go

827
00:27:29,830 --> 00:27:28,240
sean who's my friend i was riding bikes

828
00:27:31,909 --> 00:27:29,840
with and i hear adan go

829
00:27:33,750 --> 00:27:31,919
sean and all of a sudden everything

830
00:27:34,310 --> 00:27:33,760
swooped back and there's adnan also i'm

831
00:27:36,870 --> 00:27:34,320
like

832
00:27:37,990 --> 00:27:36,880
oh it's on and that was the end of the

833
00:27:43,590 --> 00:27:38,000
experience

834
00:27:46,789 --> 00:27:45,669
all right so nathan although you weren't

835
00:27:49,909 --> 00:27:46,799
there during this

836
00:27:52,470 --> 00:27:49,919
this particular time so what was your

837
00:27:53,590 --> 00:27:52,480
first time experience with so my first

838
00:27:55,269 --> 00:27:53,600
experience was

839
00:27:56,870 --> 00:27:55,279
mushrooms it wasn't anything like rick

840
00:28:00,230 --> 00:27:56,880
just explained uh

841
00:28:01,350 --> 00:28:00,240
it was much more subtle mushrooms are

842
00:28:06,230 --> 00:28:01,360
much more subtle they

843
00:28:08,310 --> 00:28:06,240
kind of pick you up slowly uh

844
00:28:09,669 --> 00:28:08,320
you know you you have your experience

845
00:28:10,630 --> 00:28:09,679
and then they let you down slowly it's

846
00:28:12,789 --> 00:28:10,640
like it's very

847
00:28:13,909 --> 00:28:12,799
almost like a nurturing mother of

848
00:28:15,990 --> 00:28:13,919
psychedelics

849
00:28:17,990 --> 00:28:16,000
uh and i think i was only like 13 or 14

850
00:28:19,590 --> 00:28:18,000
at the time i started very young

851
00:28:21,350 --> 00:28:19,600
um just wanting to have experiences and

852
00:28:22,710 --> 00:28:21,360
back then i was just wanting to have fun

853
00:28:24,630 --> 00:28:22,720
and i think we were trying to find some

854
00:28:26,630 --> 00:28:24,640
weed and we were in uh

855
00:28:27,990 --> 00:28:26,640
we ran boulder colorado it's a college

856
00:28:28,870 --> 00:28:28,000
town and

857
00:28:30,789 --> 00:28:28,880
we went to the place where all the

858
00:28:32,470 --> 00:28:30,799
college kids hang out and it was uh

859
00:28:32,789 --> 00:28:32,480
supposedly very easy to find weed there

860
00:28:34,149 --> 00:28:32,799
and

861
00:28:36,470 --> 00:28:34,159
all we find was mushrooms it was almost

862
00:28:37,669 --> 00:28:36,480
like ordained because but that but that

863
00:28:40,710 --> 00:28:37,679
experience actually

864
00:28:41,750 --> 00:28:40,720
it was uh it was just it was just kind

865
00:28:43,269 --> 00:28:41,760
of like uh maybe

866
00:28:45,430 --> 00:28:43,279
it helped me just not be afraid of these

867
00:28:48,870 --> 00:28:45,440
things at an early age

868
00:28:50,789 --> 00:28:48,880
and uh it was uh it was it was just

869
00:28:52,070 --> 00:28:50,799
you know things on the wall moved like

870
00:28:54,470 --> 00:28:52,080
like if the wallpaper

871
00:28:55,510 --> 00:28:54,480
it was a lot like if you'd seen that

872
00:28:57,269 --> 00:28:55,520
movie with johnny depp

873
00:28:59,110 --> 00:28:57,279
fearing lolita in las vegas when he's on

874
00:29:01,909 --> 00:28:59,120
mushrooms in the um

875
00:29:03,510 --> 00:29:01,919
in the uh casino and things start

876
00:29:04,710 --> 00:29:03,520
growing up the walls and growing on

877
00:29:08,070 --> 00:29:04,720
people it was

878
00:29:09,190 --> 00:29:08,080
very visual like that and uh i think my

879
00:29:10,710 --> 00:29:09,200
friend might have been having a bad

880
00:29:11,909 --> 00:29:10,720
experience i actually i just realized

881
00:29:13,350 --> 00:29:11,919
that right now because he locked himself

882
00:29:15,110 --> 00:29:13,360
in his room in his basement

883
00:29:16,549 --> 00:29:15,120
and i kept going down there saying are

884
00:29:17,909 --> 00:29:16,559
you seeing what i'm seeing

885
00:29:20,149 --> 00:29:17,919
are you experiencing this this is

886
00:29:23,110 --> 00:29:20,159
incredible this is so different

887
00:29:23,830 --> 00:29:23,120
and and he was just like hiding under

888
00:29:26,149 --> 00:29:23,840
his blanket

889
00:29:27,430 --> 00:29:26,159
and stuff and i i wish i would have

890
00:29:28,950 --> 00:29:27,440
realized what was going on that i could

891
00:29:30,710 --> 00:29:28,960
have consoled them but i was so involved

892
00:29:32,870 --> 00:29:30,720
in my own experience which was

893
00:29:33,909 --> 00:29:32,880
fantastic actually not to condone the

894
00:29:37,029 --> 00:29:33,919
drug use but

895
00:29:38,710 --> 00:29:37,039
it was uh just a very uh actually it was

896
00:29:40,710 --> 00:29:38,720
a very stereotypical

897
00:29:41,990 --> 00:29:40,720
psychedelic experience i think it wasn't

898
00:29:45,909 --> 00:29:42,000
earth shattering it was just

899
00:29:47,909 --> 00:29:45,919
kind of a lot of visuals very giggly um

900
00:29:49,029 --> 00:29:47,919
and uh it just made me kind of i guess

901
00:29:50,630 --> 00:29:49,039
not afraid of them which

902
00:29:52,389 --> 00:29:50,640
i guess is a good or a bad thing because

903
00:29:55,750 --> 00:29:52,399
since then i i did it

904
00:29:59,110 --> 00:29:55,760
several several more times okay

905
00:30:01,990 --> 00:29:59,120
so basically that was

906
00:30:04,149 --> 00:30:02,000
uh salvia for for me for the first time

907
00:30:07,510 --> 00:30:04,159
savvy for rick and then

908
00:30:09,510 --> 00:30:07,520
suicidal mushrooms so um i guess

909
00:30:11,190 --> 00:30:09,520
what was the the second one i believe

910
00:30:14,630 --> 00:30:11,200
was then the

911
00:30:17,330 --> 00:30:14,640
um dmt and i think all three of us were

912
00:30:19,830 --> 00:30:17,340
there during that time and so um

913
00:30:22,149 --> 00:30:19,840
[Music]

914
00:30:23,990 --> 00:30:22,159
how so what was that so i don't i think

915
00:30:24,389 --> 00:30:24,000
i just basically it was just us three

916
00:30:27,750 --> 00:30:24,399
there was

917
00:30:29,990 --> 00:30:27,760
actually i've only had one notable

918
00:30:31,110 --> 00:30:30,000
psychedelic experience between that that

919
00:30:32,549 --> 00:30:31,120
first experience

920
00:30:34,630 --> 00:30:32,559
and when i did those when i was with you

921
00:30:37,430 --> 00:30:34,640
guys when we were roughly 26 i guess

922
00:30:38,870 --> 00:30:37,440
26 27 something like that so uh

923
00:30:40,630 --> 00:30:38,880
otherwise i think i did

924
00:30:42,070 --> 00:30:40,640
ask it a couple times with friends and

925
00:30:43,190 --> 00:30:42,080
you always get to that point where

926
00:30:44,870 --> 00:30:43,200
rick just said you're kind of strapped

927
00:30:45,510 --> 00:30:44,880
onto a roller coaster and you kind of

928
00:30:47,190 --> 00:30:45,520
sort of say

929
00:30:48,870 --> 00:30:47,200
oh my god i didn't want this this isn't

930
00:30:51,350 --> 00:30:48,880
what i wanted i regret taking that

931
00:30:53,029 --> 00:30:51,360
and it's too late uh but they are good

932
00:30:55,029 --> 00:30:53,039
experiences you know and then

933
00:30:56,149 --> 00:30:55,039
maybe mushrooms once again and i

934
00:30:58,230 --> 00:30:56,159
remember uh

935
00:30:59,909 --> 00:30:58,240
right but i wanted to cover just dmt for

936
00:31:01,990 --> 00:30:59,919
now sure which is going down the list

937
00:31:03,590 --> 00:31:02,000
you know not of all that you done just

938
00:31:05,269 --> 00:31:03,600
specifically dmt and

939
00:31:07,669 --> 00:31:05,279
all the experiences that had happened

940
00:31:09,990 --> 00:31:07,679
but because we were all three there

941
00:31:10,710 --> 00:31:10,000
i wanted to basically kind of get that

942
00:31:14,230 --> 00:31:10,720
covered

943
00:31:16,630 --> 00:31:14,240
so i believe like i don't know why

944
00:31:18,070 --> 00:31:16,640
like not that i don't know what i was

945
00:31:19,990 --> 00:31:18,080
thinking just maybe i was maybe

946
00:31:21,590 --> 00:31:20,000
selfish in some way but i would always

947
00:31:23,430 --> 00:31:21,600
make sure that there was food

948
00:31:25,430 --> 00:31:23,440
you know then you know there was just

949
00:31:26,950 --> 00:31:25,440
kind of like okay maybe if we're gonna

950
00:31:28,870 --> 00:31:26,960
go outside let's make a fire

951
00:31:30,630 --> 00:31:28,880
getting that all set up you know because

952
00:31:32,230 --> 00:31:30,640
i knew that's what would make me feel

953
00:31:32,549 --> 00:31:32,240
comfortable so i don't know if you guys

954
00:31:34,870 --> 00:31:32,559
would

955
00:31:36,230 --> 00:31:34,880
agree with that process but just tell me

956
00:31:37,190 --> 00:31:36,240
a little bit just to set up from your

957
00:31:39,590 --> 00:31:37,200
point of view

958
00:31:40,789 --> 00:31:39,600
yeah i definitely actually took note of

959
00:31:45,669 --> 00:31:40,799
your uh

960
00:31:47,190 --> 00:31:45,679
provided us and i really appreciate that

961
00:31:49,830 --> 00:31:47,200
you know that was you were living

962
00:31:50,710 --> 00:31:49,840
in missouri at the time a very secluded

963
00:31:52,310 --> 00:31:50,720
place

964
00:31:53,590 --> 00:31:52,320
and you provided a very comfortable set

965
00:31:54,950 --> 00:31:53,600
in setting sentencing i think was

966
00:31:55,269 --> 00:31:54,960
something that timothy leary came up

967
00:31:57,590 --> 00:31:55,279
with

968
00:31:58,310 --> 00:31:57,600
uh one of the pioneers of psychedelic

969
00:32:00,710 --> 00:31:58,320
research

970
00:32:01,830 --> 00:32:00,720
uh he turned i mean the mainstream me i

971
00:32:03,909 --> 00:32:01,840
don't know if he was cuckoo or not but

972
00:32:06,149 --> 00:32:03,919
the mainstream media ended up

973
00:32:07,669 --> 00:32:06,159
making him the poster child of why not

974
00:32:09,590 --> 00:32:07,679
to do psychedelics but

975
00:32:10,950 --> 00:32:09,600
anyway yeah anon had provided an

976
00:32:12,950 --> 00:32:10,960
environment for us that was

977
00:32:15,190 --> 00:32:12,960
felt very comfortable and that is very

978
00:32:16,470 --> 00:32:15,200
important and i do remember appreciating

979
00:32:19,350 --> 00:32:16,480
that you had taken

980
00:32:19,590 --> 00:32:19,360
time to do that for us well but there's

981
00:32:26,710 --> 00:32:19,600
a

982
00:32:27,269 --> 00:32:26,720
influence of your experience it being

983
00:32:28,630 --> 00:32:27,279
set up

984
00:32:30,230 --> 00:32:28,640
in a more comfortable environment as

985
00:32:31,830 --> 00:32:30,240
opposed to it like let's say being in a

986
00:32:33,990 --> 00:32:31,840
club where it's noisy and

987
00:32:34,870 --> 00:32:34,000
everyone around you that you don't know

988
00:32:37,029 --> 00:32:34,880
and then

989
00:32:37,909 --> 00:32:37,039
you go crazy what just just talk about

990
00:32:39,430 --> 00:32:37,919
that part

991
00:32:41,430 --> 00:32:39,440
because i want to set that up also for

992
00:32:43,830 --> 00:32:41,440
people just so that they understand

993
00:32:44,870 --> 00:32:43,840
like i said we're going to go into depth

994
00:32:46,950 --> 00:32:44,880
of this so

995
00:32:48,549 --> 00:32:46,960
every little bit of process whatever

996
00:32:50,710 --> 00:32:48,559
whatever we went through

997
00:32:52,230 --> 00:32:50,720
to kind of take everyone else on the

998
00:32:54,310 --> 00:32:52,240
journey with us

999
00:32:55,990 --> 00:32:54,320
so i'm trying to remember the difference

1000
00:32:57,669 --> 00:32:56,000
because we did that we did we did that

1001
00:32:59,029 --> 00:32:57,679
we did the dmt and then and then shortly

1002
00:33:00,630 --> 00:32:59,039
after we did mushrooms at your house

1003
00:33:02,870 --> 00:33:00,640
sort of in this similar setting setting

1004
00:33:04,149 --> 00:33:02,880
but whenever whenever you're going to go

1005
00:33:05,750 --> 00:33:04,159
into this experience you want to make

1006
00:33:06,389 --> 00:33:05,760
sure the people are right the energy is

1007
00:33:08,630 --> 00:33:06,399
right

1008
00:33:10,470 --> 00:33:08,640
and there's i don't know nothing

1009
00:33:12,470 --> 00:33:10,480
terrifying around you know like

1010
00:33:13,990 --> 00:33:12,480
uh and that was that was very helpful

1011
00:33:15,430 --> 00:33:14,000
that you did that so wait what exactly

1012
00:33:17,509 --> 00:33:15,440
are you asking me then

1013
00:33:19,430 --> 00:33:17,519
like i don't understand yes just talking

1014
00:33:21,350 --> 00:33:19,440
about the setup before

1015
00:33:22,789 --> 00:33:21,360
you know we'll get into the trip itself

1016
00:33:25,509 --> 00:33:22,799
i'm just talking about the setup

1017
00:33:25,830 --> 00:33:25,519
because i don't think uh i've considered

1018
00:33:27,750 --> 00:33:25,840
that

1019
00:33:28,870 --> 00:33:27,760
you know just to do to be at a peaceful

1020
00:33:31,430 --> 00:33:28,880
place to be

1021
00:33:32,789 --> 00:33:31,440
you know among people you trust you know

1022
00:33:33,990 --> 00:33:32,799
that's right and and things like that

1023
00:33:35,830 --> 00:33:34,000
that's what i'm talking about

1024
00:33:37,509 --> 00:33:35,840
uh rick what about you do you find that

1025
00:33:39,350 --> 00:33:37,519
that's also very important or does it

1026
00:33:41,509 --> 00:33:39,360
not matter

1027
00:33:42,710 --> 00:33:41,519
well i think it's very important uh that

1028
00:33:45,269 --> 00:33:42,720
your environment is

1029
00:33:46,070 --> 00:33:45,279
comfortable because especially since you

1030
00:33:47,190 --> 00:33:46,080
know if it's

1031
00:33:49,269 --> 00:33:47,200
something that you're doing for the

1032
00:33:50,710 --> 00:33:49,279
first time you don't know what you're

1033
00:33:52,149 --> 00:33:50,720
getting yourself into so it's very

1034
00:33:53,029 --> 00:33:52,159
important to not just have a comfortable

1035
00:33:56,149 --> 00:33:53,039
environment but to be

1036
00:33:57,269 --> 00:33:56,159
with people you trust and love and a lot

1037
00:33:58,070 --> 00:33:57,279
of times it ends up making the

1038
00:34:00,230 --> 00:33:58,080
experience

1039
00:34:01,590 --> 00:34:00,240
uh a lot better like strengthens your

1040
00:34:03,269 --> 00:34:01,600
relationship i feel

1041
00:34:04,870 --> 00:34:03,279
with the people that you're with because

1042
00:34:06,549 --> 00:34:04,880
you know just like if you travel to a

1043
00:34:08,069 --> 00:34:06,559
foreign country with somebody

1044
00:34:09,669 --> 00:34:08,079
you know it's the kind of same like

1045
00:34:12,230 --> 00:34:09,679
there's a reason we call it a trip

1046
00:34:12,710 --> 00:34:12,240
you know it is it it's a it's a mental

1047
00:34:14,950 --> 00:34:12,720
trip

1048
00:34:16,230 --> 00:34:14,960
and you learn a lot from it so yeah i

1049
00:34:20,389 --> 00:34:16,240
think it's very important

1050
00:34:23,430 --> 00:34:20,399
so nathan based on your

1051
00:34:25,190 --> 00:34:23,440
experience what did you when we were

1052
00:34:27,510 --> 00:34:25,200
i believe we were outside during that

1053
00:34:29,349 --> 00:34:27,520
time and sort of like around the fire

1054
00:34:31,510 --> 00:34:29,359
kind of trying to keep it very shamanic

1055
00:34:34,869 --> 00:34:31,520
like what was your experience

1056
00:34:36,470 --> 00:34:34,879
on dmt oh so

1057
00:34:38,069 --> 00:34:36,480
i don't think we smoked it right we

1058
00:34:38,950 --> 00:34:38,079
didn't so it wasn't like a full

1059
00:34:42,149 --> 00:34:38,960
experience

1060
00:34:43,270 --> 00:34:42,159
uh that could that could be gained but i

1061
00:34:46,710 --> 00:34:43,280
remember

1062
00:34:48,230 --> 00:34:46,720
we had uh we had used a little

1063
00:34:50,149 --> 00:34:48,240
like like because we knew we knew you

1064
00:34:51,829 --> 00:34:50,159
couldn't just uh uh

1065
00:34:53,510 --> 00:34:51,839
burn it straight into a pipe so i think

1066
00:34:55,669 --> 00:34:53,520
we like sprinkled it over tobacco

1067
00:34:56,869 --> 00:34:55,679
am i remembering that correctly like

1068
00:34:58,390 --> 00:34:56,879
because you're supposed to freebase it

1069
00:35:01,109 --> 00:34:58,400
we learned later on

1070
00:35:02,069 --> 00:35:01,119
like i don't think tobacco was involved

1071
00:35:03,990 --> 00:35:02,079
based on my memory

1072
00:35:05,750 --> 00:35:04,000
i think i don't think well i know i know

1073
00:35:07,190 --> 00:35:05,760
i think i think we it was our very first

1074
00:35:08,310 --> 00:35:07,200
attempt and i don't think we smoked it

1075
00:35:11,030 --> 00:35:08,320
exactly correct but

1076
00:35:12,790 --> 00:35:11,040
it definitely worked i remember you had

1077
00:35:15,030 --> 00:35:12,800
like a bong type thing

1078
00:35:16,390 --> 00:35:15,040
and you took the first hit paperweight

1079
00:35:18,630 --> 00:35:16,400
was a paperweight

1080
00:35:19,829 --> 00:35:18,640
yeah that's what i was told at the shop

1081
00:35:21,829 --> 00:35:19,839
i was like

1082
00:35:24,470 --> 00:35:21,839
you mean the paperweights of course like

1083
00:35:26,150 --> 00:35:24,480
oh yeah the paperweights

1084
00:35:27,829 --> 00:35:26,160
absolutely yeah i think how things have

1085
00:35:28,790 --> 00:35:27,839
lightened up nowadays now you go into

1086
00:35:29,990 --> 00:35:28,800
stores and they

1087
00:35:32,069 --> 00:35:30,000
don't talk about anything they don't

1088
00:35:33,109 --> 00:35:32,079
kick you out for using the word bong but

1089
00:35:35,270 --> 00:35:33,119
anyway

1090
00:35:36,390 --> 00:35:35,280
uh yeah you had taken the first hit and

1091
00:35:37,349 --> 00:35:36,400
you were sitting to my right i do

1092
00:35:39,270 --> 00:35:37,359
remember that

1093
00:35:40,790 --> 00:35:39,280
and you could tell it was had an

1094
00:35:41,589 --> 00:35:40,800
immediate effect because you immediately

1095
00:35:43,910 --> 00:35:41,599
got silent

1096
00:35:44,950 --> 00:35:43,920
and then i took that from you added mine

1097
00:35:45,510 --> 00:35:44,960
because we each had it measured out

1098
00:35:47,030 --> 00:35:45,520
which had the

1099
00:35:48,870 --> 00:35:47,040
precise amount measured out we used a

1100
00:35:50,230 --> 00:35:48,880
super precise scale we wanted to be as

1101
00:35:54,230 --> 00:35:50,240
scientific about it as we could

1102
00:35:58,150 --> 00:35:54,240
but also uh you know be explorers

1103
00:35:59,829 --> 00:35:58,160
and i took my hit and i remember the the

1104
00:36:02,150 --> 00:35:59,839
the hum was like the first thing that i

1105
00:36:03,030 --> 00:36:02,160
felt and it just got louder and louder

1106
00:36:07,109 --> 00:36:03,040
and louder

1107
00:36:10,310 --> 00:36:07,119
until but i don't oh i do oh oh man

1108
00:36:12,390 --> 00:36:10,320
wow i'm sorry if i okay it was it was

1109
00:36:13,510 --> 00:36:12,400
okay i guess we did it right we did

1110
00:36:16,870 --> 00:36:13,520
enough because

1111
00:36:17,510 --> 00:36:16,880
uh i remember like reaching a point

1112
00:36:19,910 --> 00:36:17,520
where i was

1113
00:36:21,270 --> 00:36:19,920
i felt the hum and then i felt i saw

1114
00:36:26,470 --> 00:36:21,280
like my my entire

1115
00:36:28,790 --> 00:36:26,480
vision was like lots of like um

1116
00:36:30,230 --> 00:36:28,800
undulating shapes but perfectly

1117
00:36:31,750 --> 00:36:30,240
symmetrical like

1118
00:36:33,510 --> 00:36:31,760
i don't know like you take a small

1119
00:36:35,430 --> 00:36:33,520
snowflake and just expand it over my

1120
00:36:37,030 --> 00:36:35,440
entire vision and add a bazillion colors

1121
00:36:39,190 --> 00:36:37,040
and it all seemed like it had a reason

1122
00:36:40,870 --> 00:36:39,200
like it wasn't just madness of shapes

1123
00:36:43,990 --> 00:36:40,880
and colors it all was very very

1124
00:36:47,750 --> 00:36:44,000
intricately designed with edges and and

1125
00:36:48,390 --> 00:36:47,760
shapes and then uh and then i remembered

1126
00:36:51,030 --> 00:36:48,400
uh from

1127
00:36:51,510 --> 00:36:51,040
reading the book dmt a spirit molecule

1128
00:36:55,670 --> 00:36:51,520
uh

1129
00:36:57,430 --> 00:36:55,680
question or tell his

1130
00:36:59,030 --> 00:36:57,440
researchers his uh this is this is a

1131
00:36:59,750 --> 00:36:59,040
book by rick strassman for a little

1132
00:37:02,790 --> 00:36:59,760
background

1133
00:37:04,950 --> 00:37:02,800
who he was the very first uh

1134
00:37:06,950 --> 00:37:04,960
scientist researcher to be able to

1135
00:37:07,510 --> 00:37:06,960
officially do research with psychedelics

1136
00:37:10,230 --> 00:37:07,520
again

1137
00:37:11,190 --> 00:37:10,240
since they outlawed them in the 60s uh

1138
00:37:12,870 --> 00:37:11,200
are since they you know

1139
00:37:13,990 --> 00:37:12,880
i guess yeah they may have scheduled one

1140
00:37:15,750 --> 00:37:14,000
it would they're supposedly not be

1141
00:37:18,550 --> 00:37:15,760
supposed to be used for any purpose even

1142
00:37:20,150 --> 00:37:18,560
medicinal um he was the first one and he

1143
00:37:21,510 --> 00:37:20,160
would he would instruct his patients is

1144
00:37:22,310 --> 00:37:21,520
when they got and then once i got to

1145
00:37:23,910 --> 00:37:22,320
this thing

1146
00:37:25,430 --> 00:37:23,920
and for a while there i was lost in its

1147
00:37:27,829 --> 00:37:25,440
beauty just all these

1148
00:37:28,790 --> 00:37:27,839
this this very like intricate

1149
00:37:31,750 --> 00:37:28,800
geometrical

1150
00:37:33,589 --> 00:37:31,760
shapes insulating and and and

1151
00:37:35,589 --> 00:37:33,599
interlocking amongst each other and

1152
00:37:37,109 --> 00:37:35,599
it was it wasn't it wasn't chaotic it

1153
00:37:37,670 --> 00:37:37,119
was perfect it was perfect it was

1154
00:37:39,510 --> 00:37:37,680
beautiful

1155
00:37:40,630 --> 00:37:39,520
i could have stared at it for hours uh

1156
00:37:41,910 --> 00:37:40,640
but then i remember like in the back of

1157
00:37:43,030 --> 00:37:41,920
my mind i remember i remember he would

1158
00:37:45,190 --> 00:37:43,040
instruct his patients

1159
00:37:46,310 --> 00:37:45,200
if you see that try to poke through and

1160
00:37:48,630 --> 00:37:46,320
see what's on the other side

1161
00:37:49,349 --> 00:37:48,640
so then i was like okay so then i just

1162
00:37:52,230 --> 00:37:49,359
sort of

1163
00:37:54,150 --> 00:37:52,240
mentally willed myself through this

1164
00:37:56,950 --> 00:37:54,160
vision of of i don't want to call it

1165
00:37:58,069 --> 00:37:56,960
like a sheet like it was i it was

1166
00:37:59,349 --> 00:37:58,079
that's the only way i can say it but it

1167
00:38:00,230 --> 00:37:59,359
wasn't a sheet because it was everywhere

1168
00:38:02,390 --> 00:38:00,240
and it was

1169
00:38:03,349 --> 00:38:02,400
but anyway so i i i get to it i put

1170
00:38:06,950 --> 00:38:03,359
myself through

1171
00:38:07,510 --> 00:38:06,960
and then there was this like this other

1172
00:38:09,750 --> 00:38:07,520
shape

1173
00:38:10,710 --> 00:38:09,760
with all these things spinning all

1174
00:38:14,230 --> 00:38:10,720
around it

1175
00:38:15,349 --> 00:38:14,240
and and i just sort of knew man i had i

1176
00:38:18,550 --> 00:38:15,359
wish i wish you would have

1177
00:38:21,190 --> 00:38:18,560
done this interview when we were 28.

1178
00:38:22,630 --> 00:38:21,200
uh so i remember no i tried you guys

1179
00:38:24,630 --> 00:38:22,640
don't remember but i tried

1180
00:38:26,390 --> 00:38:24,640
okay you guys should connect maybe maybe

1181
00:38:27,670 --> 00:38:26,400
maybe we had to have more experiences be

1182
00:38:29,829 --> 00:38:27,680
older be more mature

1183
00:38:31,589 --> 00:38:29,839
to be able to talk about it publicly and

1184
00:38:33,670 --> 00:38:31,599
i just remember knowing

1185
00:38:35,670 --> 00:38:33,680
knowing i knew what this was i knew it

1186
00:38:36,550 --> 00:38:35,680
was important and i don't want to say

1187
00:38:39,190 --> 00:38:36,560
that it was like

1188
00:38:40,790 --> 00:38:39,200
cosmic consciousness or it was it

1189
00:38:42,470 --> 00:38:40,800
definitely wasn't god i knew it wasn't

1190
00:38:44,710 --> 00:38:42,480
god but i knew it was

1191
00:38:45,990 --> 00:38:44,720
very intelligent and i could ask it

1192
00:38:49,750 --> 00:38:46,000
anything or i could not

1193
00:38:51,109 --> 00:38:49,760
i could just enjoy its presence um and i

1194
00:38:52,790 --> 00:38:51,119
and i and that was pretty much it and

1195
00:38:54,150 --> 00:38:52,800
then that was like that and once i once

1196
00:38:55,829 --> 00:38:54,160
i experienced being with this

1197
00:38:57,270 --> 00:38:55,839
for a while and i think it's like it's

1198
00:38:59,190 --> 00:38:57,280
almost as soon as i realized oh

1199
00:39:01,349 --> 00:38:59,200
this is what this is like of course duh

1200
00:39:03,829 --> 00:39:01,359
i remember this it was a matter of fact

1201
00:39:05,589 --> 00:39:03,839
and then and then it kind of settled

1202
00:39:07,109 --> 00:39:05,599
down but then it kind of stays with you

1203
00:39:09,270 --> 00:39:07,119
a while like although the whole

1204
00:39:10,790 --> 00:39:09,280
real experience is over in 15 minutes

1205
00:39:12,630 --> 00:39:10,800
there's a very

1206
00:39:14,470 --> 00:39:12,640
calm sense of peace that feels stays

1207
00:39:15,190 --> 00:39:14,480
with you kind of the energy's light and

1208
00:39:17,430 --> 00:39:15,200
buzzing

1209
00:39:18,950 --> 00:39:17,440
um and i remember the the trees were

1210
00:39:20,710 --> 00:39:18,960
moving and waving and almost like

1211
00:39:23,750 --> 00:39:20,720
communicating with us and there was

1212
00:39:25,109 --> 00:39:23,760
there was like uh entities in the trees

1213
00:39:26,310 --> 00:39:25,119
and i don't know if they're animals or

1214
00:39:27,270 --> 00:39:26,320
spirits or whatever but they were

1215
00:39:29,990 --> 00:39:27,280
definitely watching us

1216
00:39:31,510 --> 00:39:30,000
and anticipating and and sort of eager

1217
00:39:34,470 --> 00:39:31,520
with us like the excitement was all

1218
00:39:34,870 --> 00:39:34,480
it was together we felt very together

1219
00:39:38,870 --> 00:39:34,880
and

1220
00:39:41,270 --> 00:39:38,880
were experiencing this together

1221
00:39:43,109 --> 00:39:41,280
and and it was a sort of a sense of

1222
00:39:44,950 --> 00:39:43,119
oneness at that point and that sort of

1223
00:39:46,630 --> 00:39:44,960
and we didn't smoke it twice that night

1224
00:39:48,150 --> 00:39:46,640
did we we just did it the one time yeah

1225
00:39:49,430 --> 00:39:48,160
okay but that sort of stayed with us

1226
00:39:50,630 --> 00:39:49,440
that was the mood that stayed with us

1227
00:39:51,589 --> 00:39:50,640
just lesser and less and lesser

1228
00:39:53,829 --> 00:39:51,599
throughout the night

1229
00:39:55,190 --> 00:39:53,839
yeah and it was very very peaceful very

1230
00:39:56,710 --> 00:39:55,200
uh the there

1231
00:39:58,550 --> 00:39:56,720
was that moment of that buzzing that was

1232
00:40:01,510 --> 00:39:58,560
like oh crap

1233
00:40:02,310 --> 00:40:01,520
strap in uh but it was uh but it i

1234
00:40:03,910 --> 00:40:02,320
didn't need to

1235
00:40:06,870 --> 00:40:03,920
fear it at all at least that one you

1236
00:40:09,270 --> 00:40:06,880
know and it was it was nice

1237
00:40:10,150 --> 00:40:09,280
so brick uh what about you with the dnt

1238
00:40:12,550 --> 00:40:10,160
so like the

1239
00:40:14,230 --> 00:40:12,560
i i didn't actually feel like i broke

1240
00:40:15,589 --> 00:40:14,240
through like a lot of people say like

1241
00:40:16,950 --> 00:40:15,599
you know where they go and some people

1242
00:40:18,309 --> 00:40:16,960
feel like they go into like a place

1243
00:40:20,309 --> 00:40:18,319
where they just see all these geometric

1244
00:40:22,790 --> 00:40:20,319
stripes i felt like i kind of like

1245
00:40:23,990 --> 00:40:22,800
was in between that experience and like

1246
00:40:27,670 --> 00:40:24,000
i would actually classify

1247
00:40:30,309 --> 00:40:27,680
it as more of like a highly intensified

1248
00:40:32,470 --> 00:40:30,319
mushroom experience uh because like

1249
00:40:33,829 --> 00:40:32,480
salvia took me to a completely well

1250
00:40:35,589 --> 00:40:33,839
i will use the word it took me to a

1251
00:40:37,750 --> 00:40:35,599
completely different universe

1252
00:40:38,870 --> 00:40:37,760
i don't know where i went um but leontee

1253
00:40:41,589 --> 00:40:38,880
didn't do that but

1254
00:40:42,470 --> 00:40:41,599
what was really interesting is at dmt

1255
00:40:43,990 --> 00:40:42,480
like

1256
00:40:45,589 --> 00:40:44,000
i remember the only thing i really

1257
00:40:48,550 --> 00:40:45,599
remember from it is that

1258
00:40:50,950 --> 00:40:48,560
all the sky seemed very intense because

1259
00:40:53,349 --> 00:40:50,960
we were at your property in robertsville

1260
00:40:55,030 --> 00:40:53,359
and like the stars just like came out at

1261
00:40:55,990 --> 00:40:55,040
me like i felt like i could see every

1262
00:40:58,550 --> 00:40:56,000
star

1263
00:40:59,990 --> 00:40:58,560
and like i remember there's there like

1264
00:41:01,109 --> 00:41:00,000
there's there was always a part of me

1265
00:41:03,030 --> 00:41:01,119
that felt like guilty

1266
00:41:04,710 --> 00:41:03,040
doing like psychedelics because it's the

1267
00:41:06,230 --> 00:41:04,720
stigma in my mind right like oh you're

1268
00:41:07,030 --> 00:41:06,240
doing drugs what would your parents

1269
00:41:09,349 --> 00:41:07,040
think of you

1270
00:41:10,390 --> 00:41:09,359
you know and i remember eventually like

1271
00:41:13,030 --> 00:41:10,400
because it was fear

1272
00:41:14,470 --> 00:41:13,040
you know and i also had a headache from

1273
00:41:15,990 --> 00:41:14,480
something else i had been at work all

1274
00:41:19,030 --> 00:41:16,000
day and i had a headache at work

1275
00:41:20,150 --> 00:41:19,040
and my dmt experience i remember kind of

1276
00:41:21,670 --> 00:41:20,160
like took me

1277
00:41:23,829 --> 00:41:21,680
i felt like for the first time my

1278
00:41:25,190 --> 00:41:23,839
consciousness like split into like two

1279
00:41:26,710 --> 00:41:25,200
different personalities

1280
00:41:28,150 --> 00:41:26,720
so like the thing that's like saying

1281
00:41:29,510 --> 00:41:28,160
telling me like you know what are you

1282
00:41:31,750 --> 00:41:29,520
doing what would your parents like

1283
00:41:33,589 --> 00:41:31,760
it seemed to like get like pulled to

1284
00:41:35,430 --> 00:41:33,599
like the right side of my brain

1285
00:41:37,750 --> 00:41:35,440
almost to where like it was like its own

1286
00:41:38,470 --> 00:41:37,760
little voice yelling and screaming at me

1287
00:41:41,030 --> 00:41:38,480
going

1288
00:41:41,829 --> 00:41:41,040
way you do these things you're bad i

1289
00:41:43,589 --> 00:41:41,839
remember like

1290
00:41:46,150 --> 00:41:43,599
i was separated from it and i was like

1291
00:41:48,230 --> 00:41:46,160
looking at it like oh my god i said

1292
00:41:50,069 --> 00:41:48,240
what like what is this kicking screaming

1293
00:41:52,630 --> 00:41:50,079
child yelling at me right now

1294
00:41:53,750 --> 00:41:52,640
and it's the psychedelic voice that's

1295
00:41:55,349 --> 00:41:53,760
always with me

1296
00:41:56,630 --> 00:41:55,359
although i actually think it's probably

1297
00:41:58,630 --> 00:41:56,640
just my consciousness i think it's

1298
00:41:59,750 --> 00:41:58,640
always with me it's the good voice in my

1299
00:42:01,750 --> 00:41:59,760
head it's just

1300
00:42:03,510 --> 00:42:01,760
much more loud and clear when i'm in

1301
00:42:05,109 --> 00:42:03,520
that experience and it's telling me

1302
00:42:07,349 --> 00:42:05,119
that little voice that's yelling and

1303
00:42:08,790 --> 00:42:07,359
screaming at you is what you listen to

1304
00:42:10,550 --> 00:42:08,800
every single day it's the voice that

1305
00:42:11,670 --> 00:42:10,560
tells you you can't do anything it's the

1306
00:42:12,069 --> 00:42:11,680
one that tells you you're not good

1307
00:42:13,510 --> 00:42:12,079
enough

1308
00:42:16,069 --> 00:42:13,520
it's the one that makes you feel really

1309
00:42:17,670 --> 00:42:16,079
bad just look at it for what it is

1310
00:42:19,030 --> 00:42:17,680
it's a kicking screaming child isn't

1311
00:42:20,390 --> 00:42:19,040
that funny that you would let such a

1312
00:42:21,670 --> 00:42:20,400
little thing yell and scream at you all

1313
00:42:23,829 --> 00:42:21,680
day and i was like

1314
00:42:24,790 --> 00:42:23,839
yeah that is really funny like why do i

1315
00:42:26,710 --> 00:42:24,800
listen to that

1316
00:42:28,470 --> 00:42:26,720
it was just like so obvious yeah at the

1317
00:42:30,550 --> 00:42:28,480
time and so

1318
00:42:31,670 --> 00:42:30,560
then like i felt like i was connected

1319
00:42:33,910 --> 00:42:31,680
with you guys

1320
00:42:35,589 --> 00:42:33,920
like i could feel like your thoughts and

1321
00:42:38,150 --> 00:42:35,599
what you guys were thinking and

1322
00:42:40,230 --> 00:42:38,160
i even felt like this sounds weird i

1323
00:42:42,309 --> 00:42:40,240
felt like the trees were like

1324
00:42:43,910 --> 00:42:42,319
speaking to me and i was like are the

1325
00:42:45,430 --> 00:42:43,920
trees like really speaking to me and the

1326
00:42:47,430 --> 00:42:45,440
voices going yes yes it is

1327
00:42:49,030 --> 00:42:47,440
but you know don't worry about that

1328
00:42:49,750 --> 00:42:49,040
right now i felt like the trees were

1329
00:42:51,430 --> 00:42:49,760
just like

1330
00:42:53,430 --> 00:42:51,440
happy that i could hear them i wasn't

1331
00:42:55,430 --> 00:42:53,440
having a conversation i was just like

1332
00:42:56,790 --> 00:42:55,440
i felt like they they knew that i could

1333
00:42:58,150 --> 00:42:56,800
like interpret what they were doing

1334
00:42:59,030 --> 00:42:58,160
because i remember the wind really

1335
00:43:01,589 --> 00:42:59,040
picked up

1336
00:43:03,109 --> 00:43:01,599
so somehow in that experience i'm

1337
00:43:04,790 --> 00:43:03,119
picking all this stuff up i feel like

1338
00:43:06,309 --> 00:43:04,800
the trees are talking to me i feel like

1339
00:43:08,630 --> 00:43:06,319
i'm picking up your thoughts

1340
00:43:09,670 --> 00:43:08,640
and so the voice that starts asking me

1341
00:43:12,150 --> 00:43:09,680
so

1342
00:43:13,750 --> 00:43:12,160
mr rick you know when you go back to you

1343
00:43:14,230 --> 00:43:13,760
know when you go back to reality you

1344
00:43:15,430 --> 00:43:14,240
know

1345
00:43:16,790 --> 00:43:15,440
what are you gonna do when you're done

1346
00:43:17,750 --> 00:43:16,800
with this experience are you just gonna

1347
00:43:20,309 --> 00:43:17,760
sit around and

1348
00:43:21,750 --> 00:43:20,319
talk about it with everybody like you're

1349
00:43:23,829 --> 00:43:21,760
gonna spend like the next

1350
00:43:25,270 --> 00:43:23,839
three or four hours just talking and

1351
00:43:26,870 --> 00:43:25,280
talking and talking like

1352
00:43:28,710 --> 00:43:26,880
you know if you realize that you don't

1353
00:43:30,150 --> 00:43:28,720
need to talk to everybody then you know

1354
00:43:30,550 --> 00:43:30,160
you can just like speak with your mind

1355
00:43:34,069 --> 00:43:30,560
and

1356
00:43:36,790 --> 00:43:34,079
was like

1357
00:43:37,270 --> 00:43:36,800
oh my god like we could like is that

1358
00:43:38,870 --> 00:43:37,280
we're like

1359
00:43:40,309 --> 00:43:38,880
that's really possibility like we could

1360
00:43:40,790 --> 00:43:40,319
speak to each other on our mind i was

1361
00:43:45,589 --> 00:43:40,800
like

1362
00:43:45,990 --> 00:43:45,599
would change if nobody had to speak

1363
00:43:48,710 --> 00:43:46,000
think of

1364
00:43:50,230 --> 00:43:48,720
all the hours that would be saved all

1365
00:43:51,510 --> 00:43:50,240
the understanding that you could have by

1366
00:43:53,190 --> 00:43:51,520
just speaking your mind through your

1367
00:43:55,030 --> 00:43:53,200
mind everybody would know what every

1368
00:43:56,550 --> 00:43:55,040
everybody's thinking every project could

1369
00:43:58,230 --> 00:43:56,560
get done in a split second but

1370
00:43:59,829 --> 00:43:58,240
you got to sit around and have meetings

1371
00:44:00,630 --> 00:43:59,839
or sit around with your friends and talk

1372
00:44:02,630 --> 00:44:00,640
about things

1373
00:44:03,990 --> 00:44:02,640
why would you do that and i was like i

1374
00:44:07,430 --> 00:44:04,000
felt empty i was like

1375
00:44:09,510 --> 00:44:07,440
well well because i like to talk

1376
00:44:11,109 --> 00:44:09,520
that's i like to do that and the voice

1377
00:44:13,829 --> 00:44:11,119
was like very well

1378
00:44:14,550 --> 00:44:13,839
and never like it sent me again i felt

1379
00:44:16,550 --> 00:44:14,560
like this

1380
00:44:18,069 --> 00:44:16,560
low like i felt like i was being like

1381
00:44:19,750 --> 00:44:18,079
you know brought back down like my

1382
00:44:21,510 --> 00:44:19,760
consciousness was being backed down and

1383
00:44:23,190 --> 00:44:21,520
the trees everything like i heard the

1384
00:44:23,750 --> 00:44:23,200
trees everything kind of starts to close

1385
00:44:26,710 --> 00:44:23,760
up

1386
00:44:28,390 --> 00:44:26,720
and as soon as the conduit as i say it's

1387
00:44:30,150 --> 00:44:28,400
closed in my mind

1388
00:44:31,750 --> 00:44:30,160
i everything came to mind i remember i

1389
00:44:34,390 --> 00:44:31,760
just chuckled and i went

1390
00:44:35,510 --> 00:44:34,400
and then i heard how don't go like that

1391
00:44:38,470 --> 00:44:35,520
nathan goes

1392
00:44:39,109 --> 00:44:38,480
then we all went we all started laughing

1393
00:44:40,950 --> 00:44:39,119
at this

1394
00:44:42,309 --> 00:44:40,960
like like we all came down at the same

1395
00:44:46,870 --> 00:44:42,319
time and nathan just goes

1396
00:44:49,990 --> 00:44:46,880
man i love you guys and that was it

1397
00:44:53,030 --> 00:44:50,000
yeah that was it yeah

1398
00:44:55,270 --> 00:44:53,040
no i i remember that you know so

1399
00:44:56,710 --> 00:44:55,280
the way it's you know i think did i go

1400
00:44:58,550 --> 00:44:56,720
first again

1401
00:44:59,829 --> 00:44:58,560
yeah yeah with the dmt yeah so what

1402
00:45:01,510 --> 00:44:59,839
happened was uh from

1403
00:45:03,030 --> 00:45:01,520
from the the experience when we had

1404
00:45:04,790 --> 00:45:03,040
visalvia i kind of

1405
00:45:06,870 --> 00:45:04,800
you know knew that like it just rushes

1406
00:45:09,349 --> 00:45:06,880
you in immediately and so

1407
00:45:11,109 --> 00:45:09,359
i just kind of like after i took it in

1408
00:45:11,430 --> 00:45:11,119
you know i just immediately handed it

1409
00:45:13,190 --> 00:45:11,440
over

1410
00:45:14,470 --> 00:45:13,200
because i knew i was going to be out you

1411
00:45:17,990 --> 00:45:14,480
know and so

1412
00:45:19,510 --> 00:45:18,000
what was interesting was that um like

1413
00:45:21,750 --> 00:45:19,520
you said that that buzz

1414
00:45:22,950 --> 00:45:21,760
that hum that it immediately kind of

1415
00:45:25,270 --> 00:45:22,960
like everything just

1416
00:45:26,069 --> 00:45:25,280
kind of started feeling heavy and it was

1417
00:45:29,910 --> 00:45:26,079
just like this

1418
00:45:32,309 --> 00:45:29,920
oh you know like this frequency change

1419
00:45:33,430 --> 00:45:32,319
so it's like when you hear this high uh

1420
00:45:35,589 --> 00:45:33,440
noise in your ear

1421
00:45:36,870 --> 00:45:35,599
and then your ear kind of shuts off but

1422
00:45:38,790 --> 00:45:36,880
also came with that

1423
00:45:40,309 --> 00:45:38,800
heavy feeling like it literally felt

1424
00:45:43,270 --> 00:45:40,319
like something was

1425
00:45:43,990 --> 00:45:43,280
was coming down too and so i kind of

1426
00:45:47,030 --> 00:45:44,000
went with it

1427
00:45:49,589 --> 00:45:47,040
you know and i closed my eyes and then

1428
00:45:50,710 --> 00:45:49,599
it became more and more and more and

1429
00:45:52,550 --> 00:45:50,720
more intense

1430
00:45:54,230 --> 00:45:52,560
and i was like where in the hell is this

1431
00:45:56,150 --> 00:45:54,240
going you know and i'm

1432
00:45:57,270 --> 00:45:56,160
i'm sitting there and i don't know that

1433
00:45:58,550 --> 00:45:57,280
i haven't just

1434
00:46:00,630 --> 00:45:58,560
talked to you guys about this or

1435
00:46:01,829 --> 00:46:00,640
discussed this but so i'm sitting there

1436
00:46:04,309 --> 00:46:01,839
and it's like

1437
00:46:05,030 --> 00:46:04,319
getting like getting to a point to where

1438
00:46:08,150 --> 00:46:05,040
it's like

1439
00:46:09,349 --> 00:46:08,160
taking over my entire body and the next

1440
00:46:11,910 --> 00:46:09,359
thing i know

1441
00:46:13,990 --> 00:46:11,920
i'm at this you know basically frequency

1442
00:46:16,790 --> 00:46:14,000
where i'm sitting and i'm smiling and

1443
00:46:18,550 --> 00:46:16,800
it's basically an orgasm

1444
00:46:20,470 --> 00:46:18,560
and it was like this weird feeling

1445
00:46:22,069 --> 00:46:20,480
because there was no nothing bodily

1446
00:46:23,430 --> 00:46:22,079
happening it was just this state of

1447
00:46:25,430 --> 00:46:23,440
being

1448
00:46:26,790 --> 00:46:25,440
and it was it was a bit confusing but i

1449
00:46:28,950 --> 00:46:26,800
didn't think about that it was just like

1450
00:46:29,990 --> 00:46:28,960
i just let myself be immersed in that

1451
00:46:32,710 --> 00:46:30,000
experience

1452
00:46:33,910 --> 00:46:32,720
and so it lasted however long it did and

1453
00:46:36,950 --> 00:46:33,920
it just kind of

1454
00:46:37,750 --> 00:46:36,960
subsided back to how it was you know

1455
00:46:39,270 --> 00:46:37,760
there wasn't any

1456
00:46:40,790 --> 00:46:39,280
anything kind of weird happening or

1457
00:46:42,230 --> 00:46:40,800
whatever and it was just the

1458
00:46:45,270 --> 00:46:42,240
understanding of like

1459
00:46:46,950 --> 00:46:45,280
that is your true state of being and i

1460
00:46:49,829 --> 00:46:46,960
was like whoa

1461
00:46:51,270 --> 00:46:49,839
you know it was just like really took

1462
00:46:53,430 --> 00:46:51,280
took me back you know because

1463
00:46:55,349 --> 00:46:53,440
we only ever think of you know you know

1464
00:46:58,630 --> 00:46:55,359
orgasms as something sexual

1465
00:47:01,430 --> 00:46:58,640
something we do you know in hiding and

1466
00:47:03,030 --> 00:47:01,440
you know we don't want our kids to see

1467
00:47:05,030 --> 00:47:03,040
it you know but it's okay if they see

1468
00:47:07,030 --> 00:47:05,040
murder and killing and everything else

1469
00:47:07,910 --> 00:47:07,040
but you know god forbid people making

1470
00:47:11,190 --> 00:47:07,920
love you know

1471
00:47:12,309 --> 00:47:11,200
and so anyway so that kind of talking

1472
00:47:15,430 --> 00:47:12,319
about stigmas

1473
00:47:16,870 --> 00:47:15,440
broke away that part that it's something

1474
00:47:19,190 --> 00:47:16,880
naughty or whatever

1475
00:47:20,870 --> 00:47:19,200
and especially with such authority like

1476
00:47:21,990 --> 00:47:20,880
you know that is your true state of

1477
00:47:25,109 --> 00:47:22,000
being you know it's like

1478
00:47:27,990 --> 00:47:25,119
like wow like that that that

1479
00:47:28,630 --> 00:47:28,000
really you know resonated with me you

1480
00:47:30,790 --> 00:47:28,640
know and then

1481
00:47:32,470 --> 00:47:30,800
of course i'll get back into it later

1482
00:47:33,030 --> 00:47:32,480
you know this is like several months

1483
00:47:34,790 --> 00:47:33,040
later

1484
00:47:36,549 --> 00:47:34,800
where i understood more regarding that

1485
00:47:40,470 --> 00:47:36,559
but you know we'll get in

1486
00:47:42,390 --> 00:47:40,480
we'll get into that so help me decide

1487
00:47:44,630 --> 00:47:42,400
guys which

1488
00:47:47,589 --> 00:47:44,640
was the was the psilocybin mushrooms

1489
00:47:50,870 --> 00:47:48,950
yeah i think that's a good one i think

1490
00:47:53,109 --> 00:47:50,880
that's right i think that was the order

1491
00:47:54,790 --> 00:47:53,119
in which i i started salvia dmt

1492
00:47:57,270 --> 00:47:54,800
and then mushrooms that's how i remember

1493
00:47:58,630 --> 00:47:57,280
right so

1494
00:48:00,870 --> 00:47:58,640
talking about you know

1495
00:48:01,829 --> 00:48:00,880
intercommunication right and i think i

1496
00:48:03,430 --> 00:48:01,839
remember we were

1497
00:48:05,270 --> 00:48:03,440
we didn't for some reason we didn't go

1498
00:48:06,549 --> 00:48:05,280
outside or we were outside but i went

1499
00:48:08,790 --> 00:48:06,559
back in

1500
00:48:10,470 --> 00:48:08,800
and so because it just took a while and

1501
00:48:12,470 --> 00:48:10,480
i just didn't the only thing i remember

1502
00:48:13,270 --> 00:48:12,480
from nathan he was just like hawking up

1503
00:48:16,069 --> 00:48:13,280
along

1504
00:48:17,750 --> 00:48:16,079
you know i don't know just i was purging

1505
00:48:19,430 --> 00:48:17,760
yeah whatever you were doing and i was

1506
00:48:21,109 --> 00:48:19,440
like thinking are you okay but i was

1507
00:48:22,630 --> 00:48:21,119
like slowly starting to feel like

1508
00:48:24,150 --> 00:48:22,640
whatever was happening with me i'm like

1509
00:48:25,750 --> 00:48:24,160
i gotta worry about that

1510
00:48:27,190 --> 00:48:25,760
i'm sure you will work it out you know

1511
00:48:29,510 --> 00:48:27,200
as long as you don't die

1512
00:48:31,349 --> 00:48:29,520
you know and then rick was just you

1513
00:48:32,150 --> 00:48:31,359
weren't you you know we were just there

1514
00:48:33,829 --> 00:48:32,160
and just

1515
00:48:35,589 --> 00:48:33,839
relaxing we were basically waiting for

1516
00:48:37,510 --> 00:48:35,599
it to kind of kick in because

1517
00:48:39,430 --> 00:48:37,520
differently from everything else it has

1518
00:48:41,670 --> 00:48:39,440
to digest and then it kind of

1519
00:48:43,990 --> 00:48:41,680
gets distributed in your bloodstream and

1520
00:48:45,670 --> 00:48:44,000
or wherever it goes whatever happens i'm

1521
00:48:48,230 --> 00:48:45,680
not too familiar with the process

1522
00:48:50,150 --> 00:48:48,240
but the whole idea is that it you know

1523
00:48:52,390 --> 00:48:50,160
it takes a while it's not immediate

1524
00:48:54,150 --> 00:48:52,400
at least not for me and so that but i

1525
00:48:55,190 --> 00:48:54,160
remember it was enough to where we went

1526
00:48:57,829 --> 00:48:55,200
back inside

1527
00:48:58,870 --> 00:48:57,839
and so what was interesting is that i

1528
00:49:01,109 --> 00:48:58,880
started feeling

1529
00:49:02,309 --> 00:49:01,119
the same feelings that had that were

1530
00:49:05,109 --> 00:49:02,319
there present during

1531
00:49:05,829 --> 00:49:05,119
salvia and dmt took me to the same place

1532
00:49:07,750 --> 00:49:05,839
again

1533
00:49:08,950 --> 00:49:07,760
but what was different this time around

1534
00:49:11,349 --> 00:49:08,960
you know was

1535
00:49:12,950 --> 00:49:11,359
i was sitting there on my table you were

1536
00:49:15,829 --> 00:49:12,960
kind of laying down

1537
00:49:17,430 --> 00:49:15,839
on on the couch but it was just rick and

1538
00:49:18,950 --> 00:49:17,440
i sitting at the table and rick was

1539
00:49:21,109 --> 00:49:18,960
talking about something else

1540
00:49:22,710 --> 00:49:21,119
and for like a split instant i don't

1541
00:49:23,430 --> 00:49:22,720
know if you remember this rick i looked

1542
00:49:25,750 --> 00:49:23,440
at you

1543
00:49:27,910 --> 00:49:25,760
you looked at me and we connected and we

1544
00:49:30,390 --> 00:49:27,920
could understand and almost like

1545
00:49:31,270 --> 00:49:30,400
like oh we could if we wanted to we

1546
00:49:33,109 --> 00:49:31,280
could just

1547
00:49:34,390 --> 00:49:33,119
read each other's minds almost like

1548
00:49:37,430 --> 00:49:34,400
almost like we were

1549
00:49:39,349 --> 00:49:37,440
recognizing that we're one and we

1550
00:49:40,950 --> 00:49:39,359
i just kind of smiled and he smiled and

1551
00:49:42,390 --> 00:49:40,960
we started laughing together

1552
00:49:44,069 --> 00:49:42,400
because we were looking at each other

1553
00:49:45,990 --> 00:49:44,079
recognizing this this information

1554
00:49:47,990 --> 00:49:46,000
going back and forth you know and i

1555
00:49:50,470 --> 00:49:48,000
remember just laughing about it uh what

1556
00:49:52,470 --> 00:49:50,480
do you remember from that rick

1557
00:49:54,230 --> 00:49:52,480
yeah i do remember that and i've

1558
00:49:56,230 --> 00:49:54,240
actually had that with other people

1559
00:49:57,510 --> 00:49:56,240
you know that i've engaged in

1560
00:49:59,750 --> 00:49:57,520
experiences with too like

1561
00:50:01,270 --> 00:49:59,760
that same kind of thing happens and i

1562
00:50:01,910 --> 00:50:01,280
also remember at that point for some

1563
00:50:04,790 --> 00:50:01,920
reason i

1564
00:50:05,589 --> 00:50:04,800
i looked at nathan and nathan like i saw

1565
00:50:07,430 --> 00:50:05,599
i felt like

1566
00:50:08,710 --> 00:50:07,440
shape shifted into like a 12 year old

1567
00:50:11,030 --> 00:50:08,720
version of himself

1568
00:50:12,230 --> 00:50:11,040
like he was like it looked like he i

1569
00:50:13,670 --> 00:50:12,240
don't know i almost like looked like he

1570
00:50:15,030 --> 00:50:13,680
was like going through something or

1571
00:50:16,549 --> 00:50:15,040
thinking through something and he had

1572
00:50:18,150 --> 00:50:16,559
like this smile i felt like

1573
00:50:19,910 --> 00:50:18,160
whatever state that he was in he was

1574
00:50:20,950 --> 00:50:19,920
like reverting to his 12 year old self i

1575
00:50:24,390 --> 00:50:20,960
was like oh look

1576
00:50:29,109 --> 00:50:24,400
there's there's kid nathan oh yeah

1577
00:50:33,670 --> 00:50:31,430
okay so that was was that the entirety

1578
00:50:34,790 --> 00:50:33,680
of your experience or was there more

1579
00:50:37,030 --> 00:50:34,800
well i mean of course there's more

1580
00:50:38,630 --> 00:50:37,040
you're just i mean that was a very long

1581
00:50:39,990 --> 00:50:38,640
i mean it was a very long evening you

1582
00:50:41,270 --> 00:50:40,000
know i mean i think it's really hard for

1583
00:50:43,430 --> 00:50:41,280
me to like recount everything that

1584
00:50:45,349 --> 00:50:43,440
happened i just remembered that it like

1585
00:50:47,109 --> 00:50:45,359
um i also remember just like i was just

1586
00:50:48,150 --> 00:50:47,119
being captivated because you guys went

1587
00:50:49,990 --> 00:50:48,160
inside

1588
00:50:52,069 --> 00:50:50,000
and i just felt like i needed to sit in

1589
00:50:53,589 --> 00:50:52,079
a chair and just like you know

1590
00:50:56,230 --> 00:50:53,599
just take in what was going on because

1591
00:50:59,109 --> 00:50:56,240
i'd never like mushrooms are so much

1592
00:51:00,390 --> 00:50:59,119
lighter you know than like salvia or dmt

1593
00:51:02,549 --> 00:51:00,400
you know you don't get like this

1594
00:51:04,230 --> 00:51:02,559
launch or this like new universe but you

1595
00:51:07,190 --> 00:51:04,240
do have like this like

1596
00:51:08,790 --> 00:51:07,200
really like interesting form of clarity

1597
00:51:10,390 --> 00:51:08,800
um which is why i was like man everybody

1598
00:51:11,990 --> 00:51:10,400
talks about mushrooms like

1599
00:51:14,309 --> 00:51:12,000
why i think they're so bad like what is

1600
00:51:16,790 --> 00:51:14,319
so bad about what's happening right now

1601
00:51:19,270 --> 00:51:16,800
um and i it because it wasn't like being

1602
00:51:21,030 --> 00:51:19,280
drunk i didn't feel sick i didn't feel

1603
00:51:22,549 --> 00:51:21,040
like i was out of my mind i actually

1604
00:51:24,150 --> 00:51:22,559
felt like i was very

1605
00:51:25,589 --> 00:51:24,160
clear and there was like things that i

1606
00:51:27,349 --> 00:51:25,599
was like making sense of and like you

1607
00:51:29,750 --> 00:51:27,359
said a non we connected on

1608
00:51:31,270 --> 00:51:29,760
levels like maybe that we always connect

1609
00:51:31,990 --> 00:51:31,280
on we're just like not aware of it

1610
00:51:34,630 --> 00:51:32,000
because

1611
00:51:35,990 --> 00:51:34,640
right just so clouded with whatever junk

1612
00:51:37,589 --> 00:51:36,000
we've got going on

1613
00:51:38,549 --> 00:51:37,599
in our brains with whether i mean

1614
00:51:39,990 --> 00:51:38,559
there's there's a part of your brain

1615
00:51:40,630 --> 00:51:40,000
like unfortunately i'm not an expert on

1616
00:51:41,990 --> 00:51:40,640
this but

1617
00:51:43,829 --> 00:51:42,000
you know there's a part of your brain

1618
00:51:46,230 --> 00:51:43,839
that houses what they consider the

1619
00:51:47,030 --> 00:51:46,240
hold on is there an is there an expert

1620
00:51:49,430 --> 00:51:47,040
really ever

1621
00:51:51,349 --> 00:51:49,440
out there well i mean when it comes to

1622
00:51:53,109 --> 00:51:51,359
experiences maybe not but there's been

1623
00:51:54,790 --> 00:51:53,119
study at least on the brain that kind of

1624
00:51:56,549 --> 00:51:54,800
coincide with why people might

1625
00:51:59,030 --> 00:51:56,559
experience what they do

1626
00:52:00,150 --> 00:51:59,040
um and so like when they say for example

1627
00:52:01,750 --> 00:52:00,160
like they feel like they're more

1628
00:52:03,109 --> 00:52:01,760
conscious on mushrooms

1629
00:52:04,630 --> 00:52:03,119
it might just be that you know there's

1630
00:52:06,150 --> 00:52:04,640
other parts of the brain that are being

1631
00:52:07,750 --> 00:52:06,160
activated or other parts of the brain

1632
00:52:08,470 --> 00:52:07,760
that are being deactivated that are

1633
00:52:11,349 --> 00:52:08,480
usually

1634
00:52:13,030 --> 00:52:11,359
super activated every single day so your

1635
00:52:13,990 --> 00:52:13,040
altered reality is because of the

1636
00:52:17,430 --> 00:52:14,000
altered

1637
00:52:19,109 --> 00:52:17,440
your brain

1638
00:52:20,710 --> 00:52:19,119
which is why some things might seem

1639
00:52:21,750 --> 00:52:20,720
familiar to you because

1640
00:52:23,750 --> 00:52:21,760
these are things that you are

1641
00:52:24,950 --> 00:52:23,760
experiencing and you are picking up but

1642
00:52:27,030 --> 00:52:24,960
maybe you're just not as consciously

1643
00:52:27,670 --> 00:52:27,040
aware of it because you've got the ego

1644
00:52:30,549 --> 00:52:27,680
brain on

1645
00:52:31,670 --> 00:52:30,559
all day and it it has a different

1646
00:52:33,670 --> 00:52:31,680
perspective

1647
00:52:35,109 --> 00:52:33,680
so i don't know it might be that we're

1648
00:52:36,390 --> 00:52:35,119
always connected that way we're just not

1649
00:52:39,589 --> 00:52:36,400
as aware of it

1650
00:52:42,630 --> 00:52:39,599
so i don't know i mean that's something

1651
00:52:44,069 --> 00:52:42,640
go ahead well would you say that it

1652
00:52:48,150 --> 00:52:44,079
basically

1653
00:52:50,230 --> 00:52:48,160
um kind of it it starts out slow

1654
00:52:52,390 --> 00:52:50,240
and it keeps rising and rising and

1655
00:52:54,630 --> 00:52:52,400
rising and then it peaks

1656
00:52:55,990 --> 00:52:54,640
and then it kind of mellows off you know

1657
00:52:57,349 --> 00:52:56,000
because there's several times where i

1658
00:52:59,270 --> 00:52:57,359
thought like okay wow

1659
00:53:00,470 --> 00:52:59,280
that was whatever i was going through

1660
00:53:02,950 --> 00:53:00,480
whatever i experienced

1661
00:53:04,470 --> 00:53:02,960
um you know kind of peaked and then i

1662
00:53:06,309 --> 00:53:04,480
was like okay that that's

1663
00:53:07,589 --> 00:53:06,319
you know not not peaked but like it felt

1664
00:53:09,510 --> 00:53:07,599
like that was it

1665
00:53:10,710 --> 00:53:09,520
but that was just just the beginning

1666
00:53:13,109 --> 00:53:10,720
just you know when i

1667
00:53:14,230 --> 00:53:13,119
relaxed and i thought okay i can go

1668
00:53:16,230 --> 00:53:14,240
about what

1669
00:53:17,750 --> 00:53:16,240
you know getting a cup or whatever i'll

1670
00:53:19,829 --> 00:53:17,760
be in the middle of grabbing a cup and

1671
00:53:21,190 --> 00:53:19,839
then another experience starts

1672
00:53:23,829 --> 00:53:21,200
you know i don't know if you guys you

1673
00:53:26,870 --> 00:53:23,839
know you know had that experience but

1674
00:53:29,270 --> 00:53:26,880
it comes in waves but it also has like

1675
00:53:30,630 --> 00:53:29,280
even like on the down like on the trough

1676
00:53:31,589 --> 00:53:30,640
so to speak where you feel like it's

1677
00:53:33,990 --> 00:53:31,599
wearing off

1678
00:53:35,829 --> 00:53:34,000
i feel like there's always a part of you

1679
00:53:37,910 --> 00:53:35,839
that knows though that it's still

1680
00:53:40,069 --> 00:53:37,920
kind of there like there's always like

1681
00:53:43,510 --> 00:53:40,079
this underlying feeling of like uh

1682
00:53:45,589 --> 00:53:43,520
uh i'm not done with you yet you know

1683
00:53:47,430 --> 00:53:45,599
so you'll be like uh i don't know and

1684
00:53:48,150 --> 00:53:47,440
then all of a sudden the wave comes and

1685
00:53:51,270 --> 00:53:48,160
the wave

1686
00:53:52,630 --> 00:53:51,280
can be good sometimes it's not so good

1687
00:53:54,470 --> 00:53:52,640
sometimes like i don't know you might

1688
00:53:57,190 --> 00:53:54,480
get like i feel like during a lot of

1689
00:54:00,390 --> 00:53:57,200
experiences too i'm also like reminded

1690
00:54:01,270 --> 00:54:00,400
of my like inevitable parish on this

1691
00:54:03,270 --> 00:54:01,280
planet like

1692
00:54:05,190 --> 00:54:03,280
ah you know life is good life is great

1693
00:54:07,270 --> 00:54:05,200
but it doesn't last forever

1694
00:54:08,470 --> 00:54:07,280
and it's always kind of like a oh no

1695
00:54:10,150 --> 00:54:08,480
like i feel like i'm like

1696
00:54:11,910 --> 00:54:10,160
you know pinocchio or something or like

1697
00:54:12,630 --> 00:54:11,920
the boy that came here to play and it's

1698
00:54:14,790 --> 00:54:12,640
like

1699
00:54:16,870 --> 00:54:14,800
my parents telling me at some point it's

1700
00:54:18,790 --> 00:54:16,880
gonna be time to come inside again

1701
00:54:20,630 --> 00:54:18,800
so yeah and i'm always like oh and that

1702
00:54:23,750 --> 00:54:20,640
can really make my experience

1703
00:54:25,270 --> 00:54:23,760
tough and i don't think it's a weird

1704
00:54:28,069 --> 00:54:25,280
wave

1705
00:54:28,549 --> 00:54:28,079
well i wanted to um wanted to share just

1706
00:54:31,670 --> 00:54:28,559
you know

1707
00:54:34,069 --> 00:54:31,680
uh don't want to move on before i um

1708
00:54:35,109 --> 00:54:34,079
cover this part so i don't know if what

1709
00:54:37,430 --> 00:54:35,119
during this time

1710
00:54:39,190 --> 00:54:37,440
we're still in in that room i think you

1711
00:54:40,950 --> 00:54:39,200
were still on the bed or whatever but we

1712
00:54:42,630 --> 00:54:40,960
were just talking to each other

1713
00:54:44,870 --> 00:54:42,640
and then each one of us would kind of go

1714
00:54:47,109 --> 00:54:44,880
in and out after each experience

1715
00:54:48,710 --> 00:54:47,119
well i remember um i don't know how we

1716
00:54:49,750 --> 00:54:48,720
brought up a heart that subject came

1717
00:54:52,789 --> 00:54:49,760
about we were talking about the

1718
00:54:56,870 --> 00:54:54,789
and so i remember looking at at the

1719
00:54:59,109 --> 00:54:56,880
dollar bill and i was like oh guys

1720
00:55:00,789 --> 00:54:59,119
look the illuminati tried to control us

1721
00:55:02,230 --> 00:55:00,799
but at that point we were laughing not

1722
00:55:03,910 --> 00:55:02,240
because we were like out of control

1723
00:55:05,190 --> 00:55:03,920
because of the substance but because on

1724
00:55:08,230 --> 00:55:05,200
this different level

1725
00:55:10,309 --> 00:55:08,240
you realize there's nothing out there

1726
00:55:12,069 --> 00:55:10,319
that is a threat

1727
00:55:13,510 --> 00:55:12,079
that's what i perceived and i'll let you

1728
00:55:14,870 --> 00:55:13,520
guys talk about that you know about that

1729
00:55:15,990 --> 00:55:14,880
as well just hold that thought i'll

1730
00:55:18,870 --> 00:55:16,000
remind you of it too

1731
00:55:20,630 --> 00:55:18,880
but for one that there is no threat but

1732
00:55:21,430 --> 00:55:20,640
then what happened is basically is that

1733
00:55:24,789 --> 00:55:21,440
as i was

1734
00:55:27,430 --> 00:55:24,799
watching that that pyramid with that eye

1735
00:55:28,870 --> 00:55:27,440
more information came to me and i don't

1736
00:55:30,069 --> 00:55:28,880
know if i ever relayed that to you guys

1737
00:55:31,270 --> 00:55:30,079
at that moment maybe you might have

1738
00:55:33,430 --> 00:55:31,280
heard me talk about it

1739
00:55:34,950 --> 00:55:33,440
but what's interesting is that i saw the

1740
00:55:36,830 --> 00:55:34,960
whole world

1741
00:55:37,990 --> 00:55:36,840
as um

1742
00:55:41,510 --> 00:55:38,000
[Music]

1743
00:55:43,750 --> 00:55:41,520
basically like this this uh experiment

1744
00:55:45,510 --> 00:55:43,760
right but not not experienced by

1745
00:55:47,430 --> 00:55:45,520
somebody else experiment by some you

1746
00:55:50,549 --> 00:55:47,440
know imposed by somebody else but

1747
00:55:53,109 --> 00:55:50,559
it's our experience experiment as

1748
00:55:54,309 --> 00:55:53,119
these beings that we are these unlimited

1749
00:55:58,309 --> 00:55:54,319
infinite beings

1750
00:56:01,510 --> 00:55:58,319
to reduce our selves to this level

1751
00:56:03,750 --> 00:56:01,520
to what we're experiencing now and to

1752
00:56:04,950 --> 00:56:03,760
just see what would happen you know not

1753
00:56:06,710 --> 00:56:04,960
knowing who we are not

1754
00:56:08,390 --> 00:56:06,720
remembering and basically developing

1755
00:56:11,430 --> 00:56:08,400
life and i could just see

1756
00:56:13,990 --> 00:56:11,440
history happening you know uh

1757
00:56:15,990 --> 00:56:14,000
the ships sailing over the oceans you

1758
00:56:17,670 --> 00:56:16,000
know discovering new land and all this

1759
00:56:19,990 --> 00:56:17,680
other stuff that was happening

1760
00:56:21,349 --> 00:56:20,000
but what was interesting is that then i

1761
00:56:23,030 --> 00:56:21,359
don't know if it was you or rick that

1762
00:56:24,470 --> 00:56:23,040
mentioned something about you know

1763
00:56:26,470 --> 00:56:24,480
about what about the ones that are

1764
00:56:29,030 --> 00:56:26,480
controlling us i could see

1765
00:56:30,470 --> 00:56:29,040
how small of a group that actually is

1766
00:56:33,990 --> 00:56:30,480
that

1767
00:56:35,510 --> 00:56:34,000
control this somehow

1768
00:56:37,349 --> 00:56:35,520
right that's what i was seeing at that

1769
00:56:38,789 --> 00:56:37,359
moment that they can control this

1770
00:56:41,510 --> 00:56:38,799
somehow and so

1771
00:56:43,030 --> 00:56:41,520
through industry to corporations through

1772
00:56:45,589 --> 00:56:43,040
these different companies

1773
00:56:47,430 --> 00:56:45,599
um it's like a hidden hand to where they

1774
00:56:49,349 --> 00:56:47,440
try to kind of push and move these

1775
00:56:51,349 --> 00:56:49,359
pieces into place

1776
00:56:53,510 --> 00:56:51,359
but this is the part that i that then

1777
00:56:54,230 --> 00:56:53,520
went on to the next level for me which

1778
00:56:58,390 --> 00:56:54,240
was

1779
00:57:01,030 --> 00:56:58,400
selective

1780
00:57:01,829 --> 00:57:01,040
six or seven i still can't hone down the

1781
00:57:06,789 --> 00:57:01,839
number

1782
00:57:10,390 --> 00:57:06,799
um oversold it's kind of like these

1783
00:57:11,510 --> 00:57:10,400
six or seven uh i guess energy beings

1784
00:57:12,789 --> 00:57:11,520
whatever you want to call it i don't

1785
00:57:15,510 --> 00:57:12,799
know how to describe him

1786
00:57:16,069 --> 00:57:15,520
they were basically left in charge to

1787
00:57:20,069 --> 00:57:16,079
stay

1788
00:57:22,950 --> 00:57:20,079
we all are

1789
00:57:24,069 --> 00:57:22,960
to kind of be there so that we don't

1790
00:57:26,390 --> 00:57:24,079
like just

1791
00:57:28,150 --> 00:57:26,400
everything up you know it's kind of

1792
00:57:30,390 --> 00:57:28,160
like while we're all doing this

1793
00:57:32,870 --> 00:57:30,400
game while we're playing this game out

1794
00:57:35,670 --> 00:57:32,880
they're holding this higher frequency

1795
00:57:37,270 --> 00:57:35,680
and are you know making sure that things

1796
00:57:38,710 --> 00:57:37,280
don't go crazy so that

1797
00:57:41,829 --> 00:57:38,720
even these guys that we call the

1798
00:57:42,710 --> 00:57:41,839
illuminati are not necessarily aware of

1799
00:57:44,710 --> 00:57:42,720
this this

1800
00:57:46,150 --> 00:57:44,720
specific group and that's what i

1801
00:57:48,390 --> 00:57:46,160
experienced you know

1802
00:57:49,349 --> 00:57:48,400
during that time and so that's when like

1803
00:57:51,990 --> 00:57:49,359
and then because

1804
00:57:52,630 --> 00:57:52,000
then it took that whole thing out it was

1805
00:57:54,789 --> 00:57:52,640
like oh

1806
00:57:55,990 --> 00:57:54,799
it's just an experience some people are

1807
00:57:57,430 --> 00:57:56,000
going to have a great one

1808
00:57:59,109 --> 00:57:57,440
some people are going to have bad ones

1809
00:58:01,510 --> 00:57:59,119
such as being homeless

1810
00:58:02,470 --> 00:58:01,520
no food no home obviously it's

1811
00:58:05,670 --> 00:58:02,480
homelessness

1812
00:58:07,270 --> 00:58:05,680
but you know you know just relationships

1813
00:58:10,630 --> 00:58:07,280
horrible relationships

1814
00:58:14,069 --> 00:58:10,640
you know

1815
00:58:16,630 --> 00:58:14,079
and so the whole point was that

1816
00:58:18,309 --> 00:58:16,640
um there's nothing to worry about you

1817
00:58:20,309 --> 00:58:18,319
know there's something to worry about

1818
00:58:21,829 --> 00:58:20,319
everything is just fine just keep on

1819
00:58:23,349 --> 00:58:21,839
living you know living your experience

1820
00:58:26,150 --> 00:58:23,359
doing what you got to do

1821
00:58:26,789 --> 00:58:26,160
and it will all reveal itself eventually

1822
00:58:29,589 --> 00:58:26,799
so

1823
00:58:32,230 --> 00:58:29,599
nathan what did you did you did you have

1824
00:58:36,150 --> 00:58:32,240
any other experiences during that time

1825
00:58:37,910 --> 00:58:36,160
um oh yeah like like rick said uh

1826
00:58:39,510 --> 00:58:37,920
several but um i do remember that

1827
00:58:40,789 --> 00:58:39,520
particular that was actually my takeaway

1828
00:58:41,670 --> 00:58:40,799
from that experience i think that was

1829
00:58:44,870 --> 00:58:41,680
like the

1830
00:58:46,789 --> 00:58:44,880
shared and then

1831
00:58:48,630 --> 00:58:46,799
and then the the thing on the illuminati

1832
00:58:49,829 --> 00:58:48,640
we were kind of because up until then it

1833
00:58:51,109 --> 00:58:49,839
was something we always feared and

1834
00:58:52,630 --> 00:58:51,119
talked about when we researched we

1835
00:58:55,750 --> 00:58:52,640
shared information with people

1836
00:58:57,030 --> 00:58:55,760
you know and and uh we

1837
00:58:58,710 --> 00:58:57,040
for some reason yeah you looked at that

1838
00:58:59,750 --> 00:58:58,720
dollar bill and i don't know how much

1839
00:59:00,710 --> 00:58:59,760
went through your head but you should

1840
00:59:03,270 --> 00:59:00,720
like we shared with us

1841
00:59:05,190 --> 00:59:03,280
and and we just realized that how

1842
00:59:08,950 --> 00:59:05,200
ridiculous was to be afraid of these

1843
00:59:11,030 --> 00:59:08,960
people so and how to spend so much time

1844
00:59:12,549 --> 00:59:11,040
trying to figure out their plan and how

1845
00:59:13,510 --> 00:59:12,559
to stop their plan and stuff like that

1846
00:59:15,349 --> 00:59:13,520
when it's

1847
00:59:16,630 --> 00:59:15,359
it's i don't want to say it's just a

1848
00:59:18,309 --> 00:59:16,640
game but it's a

1849
00:59:20,390 --> 00:59:18,319
it's definitely just an experience and

1850
00:59:23,670 --> 00:59:20,400
there's well i don't mean a game in a

1851
00:59:25,910 --> 00:59:23,680
um in a downplaying it sense

1852
00:59:28,069 --> 00:59:25,920
it meaning game as in you were a

1853
00:59:30,309 --> 00:59:28,079
participant who chose to be here

1854
00:59:31,109 --> 00:59:30,319
not not you know trying to belittle

1855
00:59:32,630 --> 00:59:31,119
experiences

1856
00:59:34,230 --> 00:59:32,640
you know or anything like that that's

1857
00:59:35,750 --> 00:59:34,240
what i mean but by game

1858
00:59:37,349 --> 00:59:35,760
yeah that's a perfect way to explain it

1859
00:59:38,549 --> 00:59:37,359
yeah that's kind of what what what

1860
00:59:40,069 --> 00:59:38,559
what i remember that was my takeaway

1861
00:59:41,030 --> 00:59:40,079
from that experience that the main thing

1862
00:59:42,069 --> 00:59:41,040
was just kind of like

1863
00:59:43,510 --> 00:59:42,079
i don't think i ever looked at the

1864
00:59:45,190 --> 00:59:43,520
illuminati the same way again i don't

1865
00:59:46,390 --> 00:59:45,200
think i ever had that same sort of fear

1866
00:59:47,910 --> 00:59:46,400
that i had over

1867
00:59:49,190 --> 00:59:47,920
you know this this thing this secret

1868
00:59:50,710 --> 00:59:49,200
hand that controls everything that you

1869
00:59:52,870 --> 00:59:50,720
can't control you know that you can't

1870
00:59:56,710 --> 00:59:52,880
it's out of our control

1871
00:59:59,670 --> 00:59:56,720
so what so what you know

1872
01:00:01,030 --> 00:59:59,680
rick what about you this actually

1873
01:00:03,109 --> 01:00:01,040
reminds me i can't believe i forgot

1874
01:00:04,870 --> 01:00:03,119
about this i i think about actually this

1875
01:00:06,470 --> 01:00:04,880
this experience that we all had was like

1876
01:00:08,870 --> 01:00:06,480
i think 10 years ago

1877
01:00:10,150 --> 01:00:08,880
i think we were like it's a long time

1878
01:00:12,710 --> 01:00:10,160
ago

1879
01:00:14,230 --> 01:00:12,720
i i do remember like when we finally all

1880
01:00:15,030 --> 01:00:14,240
came together for the first time we all

1881
01:00:16,710 --> 01:00:15,040
went outside

1882
01:00:17,829 --> 01:00:16,720
you know back outside and that was

1883
01:00:18,549 --> 01:00:17,839
something i remember happening i

1884
01:00:21,030 --> 01:00:18,559
remember like

1885
01:00:21,670 --> 01:00:21,040
all of a sudden i i started realizing

1886
01:00:23,750 --> 01:00:21,680
like

1887
01:00:25,670 --> 01:00:23,760
how ridiculous everything that we're

1888
01:00:27,349 --> 01:00:25,680
doing like because i was really stressed

1889
01:00:28,950 --> 01:00:27,359
out at my job i mean for even years

1890
01:00:29,670 --> 01:00:28,960
after that i was still stressed out by

1891
01:00:31,190 --> 01:00:29,680
my job

1892
01:00:33,430 --> 01:00:31,200
you know and like i remember thinking it

1893
01:00:35,349 --> 01:00:33,440
was so ridiculous that everybody's like

1894
01:00:36,470 --> 01:00:35,359
speeding on the highway to get to work

1895
01:00:38,390 --> 01:00:36,480
on time like

1896
01:00:39,910 --> 01:00:38,400
oh my god i'm gonna be late i gotta get

1897
01:00:41,829 --> 01:00:39,920
to this job and like

1898
01:00:43,510 --> 01:00:41,839
you know oh look out there's chemtrails

1899
01:00:43,910 --> 01:00:43,520
and every like ah i remember thinking

1900
01:00:49,430 --> 01:00:43,920
like

1901
01:00:50,470 --> 01:00:49,440
what is everybody i remember just asking

1902
01:00:53,349 --> 01:00:50,480
that out loud like

1903
01:00:54,789 --> 01:00:53,359
what is everybody doing like what are we

1904
01:00:56,230 --> 01:00:54,799
all doing here like

1905
01:00:58,789 --> 01:00:56,240
and i remember just like seeing like the

1906
01:01:01,589 --> 01:00:58,799
planet is just like the trees

1907
01:01:02,950 --> 01:01:01,599
and the grass you know and here we are

1908
01:01:04,710 --> 01:01:02,960
these human beings living this

1909
01:01:05,750 --> 01:01:04,720
experience that we created and we've

1910
01:01:08,630 --> 01:01:05,760
created this

1911
01:01:10,069 --> 01:01:08,640
very stressful situation you know and at

1912
01:01:12,309 --> 01:01:10,079
that moment i just thought it was really

1913
01:01:14,230 --> 01:01:12,319
stupid you know i'm like why don't we do

1914
01:01:15,750 --> 01:01:14,240
this you know and

1915
01:01:18,150 --> 01:01:15,760
i remember just thinking like i don't

1916
01:01:19,190 --> 01:01:18,160
know i just thought i think we create a

1917
01:01:21,589 --> 01:01:19,200
lot of stress

1918
01:01:22,870 --> 01:01:21,599
um and we freak out about all kinds of

1919
01:01:23,990 --> 01:01:22,880
things and like actually really you know

1920
01:01:25,910 --> 01:01:24,000
you think about it i mean like

1921
01:01:27,190 --> 01:01:25,920
all of us are gonna die anyway and so

1922
01:01:28,950 --> 01:01:27,200
it's just like you know

1923
01:01:30,549 --> 01:01:28,960
but we'll freak out about little tiny

1924
01:01:32,309 --> 01:01:30,559
things that maybe

1925
01:01:33,910 --> 01:01:32,319
won't concern us or we'll never i don't

1926
01:01:35,349 --> 01:01:33,920
know i mean

1927
01:01:36,549 --> 01:01:35,359
i i don't know what to say i just

1928
01:01:37,510 --> 01:01:36,559
remember thinking it was just really

1929
01:01:39,750 --> 01:01:37,520
funny

1930
01:01:41,349 --> 01:01:39,760
everything right was were there any

1931
01:01:43,349 --> 01:01:41,359
other experiences you had during that

1932
01:01:49,190 --> 01:01:43,359
night

1933
01:01:50,789 --> 01:01:49,200
i mean i don't i guess i felt like you

1934
01:01:51,670 --> 01:01:50,799
guys did too about things like you know

1935
01:01:54,230 --> 01:01:51,680
like generally

1936
01:01:54,789 --> 01:01:54,240
i think everything's gonna be okay you

1937
01:01:56,230 --> 01:01:54,799
know but

1938
01:01:59,190 --> 01:01:56,240
you know then of course i'm also

1939
01:02:01,109 --> 01:01:59,200
reminded of like you know why

1940
01:02:02,710 --> 01:02:01,119
why things aren't always okay you know

1941
01:02:04,390 --> 01:02:02,720
because like we're we're

1942
01:02:05,670 --> 01:02:04,400
we're all here sharing an experience

1943
01:02:06,870 --> 01:02:05,680
like we're a bunch of kids playing in a

1944
01:02:09,670 --> 01:02:06,880
sandbox but

1945
01:02:10,069 --> 01:02:09,680
not everybody plays nice you know and

1946
01:02:13,430 --> 01:02:10,079
and

1947
01:02:15,270 --> 01:02:13,440
it's it's i don't know it's

1948
01:02:17,270 --> 01:02:15,280
it's twist i think i don't know it's

1949
01:02:19,270 --> 01:02:17,280
twisted i i did learn on another

1950
01:02:21,029 --> 01:02:19,280
mushroom experience later that i felt

1951
01:02:22,710 --> 01:02:21,039
like you know the mushroom represent

1952
01:02:24,710 --> 01:02:22,720
looks like kind of like it's like a dome

1953
01:02:26,390 --> 01:02:24,720
you know it kind of like almost like it

1954
01:02:28,230 --> 01:02:26,400
sends out like a radio signal

1955
01:02:30,309 --> 01:02:28,240
but now i'm like well your brain does

1956
01:02:32,069 --> 01:02:30,319
the same thing you know so like if you

1957
01:02:33,990 --> 01:02:32,079
want something or you even feel

1958
01:02:35,829 --> 01:02:34,000
something like you know you dream about

1959
01:02:37,510 --> 01:02:35,839
something you send waves out

1960
01:02:39,430 --> 01:02:37,520
and your waves bounce off other other

1961
01:02:41,029 --> 01:02:39,440
people's waves and those waves will come

1962
01:02:42,309 --> 01:02:41,039
back to you but they come to you in the

1963
01:02:44,390 --> 01:02:42,319
form of

1964
01:02:46,069 --> 01:02:44,400
natural law so you know it might be a

1965
01:02:47,430 --> 01:02:46,079
sign that you see it might be something

1966
01:02:47,990 --> 01:02:47,440
somebody says to you it might be

1967
01:02:50,309 --> 01:02:48,000
something

1968
01:02:51,829 --> 01:02:50,319
somebody introduces you to like giving

1969
01:02:52,950 --> 01:02:51,839
you things that you need to get what you

1970
01:02:54,710 --> 01:02:52,960
want and that doesn't mean it's

1971
01:02:57,109 --> 01:02:54,720
necessarily always something good

1972
01:02:58,710 --> 01:02:57,119
you know maybe it's like a an experience

1973
01:03:00,309 --> 01:02:58,720
that might make you feel bad but it's

1974
01:03:01,589 --> 01:03:00,319
something you need to experience because

1975
01:03:02,069 --> 01:03:01,599
you need to learn from it like the

1976
01:03:03,910 --> 01:03:02,079
universe

1977
01:03:05,349 --> 01:03:03,920
i don't think necessarily cares whether

1978
01:03:06,950 --> 01:03:05,359
you're happy or not because

1979
01:03:08,789 --> 01:03:06,960
it's only giving you what you need not

1980
01:03:09,589 --> 01:03:08,799
necessarily well maybe it is giving you

1981
01:03:11,270 --> 01:03:09,599
what you want

1982
01:03:13,510 --> 01:03:11,280
but it can be in the form of tough love

1983
01:03:14,789 --> 01:03:13,520
too but because we're not completely in

1984
01:03:16,549 --> 01:03:14,799
tune with everything

1985
01:03:19,029 --> 01:03:16,559
there are things that will be sent your

1986
01:03:21,430 --> 01:03:19,039
way like little little signs little

1987
01:03:23,109 --> 01:03:21,440
little yeah i guess symbols that you

1988
01:03:24,950 --> 01:03:23,119
just might not recognize

1989
01:03:26,390 --> 01:03:24,960
and these things happen every day and

1990
01:03:28,630 --> 01:03:26,400
they happen every day with everybody

1991
01:03:30,069 --> 01:03:28,640
so the mushroom like taught me that like

1992
01:03:32,069 --> 01:03:30,079
felt like wow you know

1993
01:03:33,349 --> 01:03:32,079
like it's you live in a you live on a

1994
01:03:34,710 --> 01:03:33,359
planet where there's there's these

1995
01:03:36,150 --> 01:03:34,720
different laws but like there's

1996
01:03:37,990 --> 01:03:36,160
we have these different like natural

1997
01:03:40,710 --> 01:03:38,000
laws that we live under so

1998
01:03:42,069 --> 01:03:40,720
and we can't break them uh so we're

1999
01:03:42,950 --> 01:03:42,079
learning we're learning to navigate

2000
01:03:45,190 --> 01:03:42,960
through all of that

2001
01:03:46,309 --> 01:03:45,200
that's that's what i've learned from it

2002
01:03:48,870 --> 01:03:46,319
so before

2003
01:03:49,829 --> 01:03:48,880
you know we go on much further with you

2004
01:03:51,190 --> 01:03:49,839
know with

2005
01:03:53,910 --> 01:03:51,200
more of the other experiences and

2006
01:03:56,870 --> 01:03:53,920
whatnot i wanted to cover

2007
01:03:58,549 --> 01:03:56,880
cover at least just at this point was

2008
01:04:01,829 --> 01:03:58,559
another point

2009
01:04:04,870 --> 01:04:01,839
have you either of you

2010
01:04:05,910 --> 01:04:04,880
at this point uh seen any kind of like

2011
01:04:08,789 --> 01:04:05,920
beings

2012
01:04:10,549 --> 01:04:08,799
or or specific like that came by to kind

2013
01:04:11,829 --> 01:04:10,559
of be your guides or to talk to you

2014
01:04:13,910 --> 01:04:11,839
anything like that

2015
01:04:15,029 --> 01:04:13,920
i'm asking for that specifically not not

2016
01:04:16,710 --> 01:04:15,039
things that happened like

2017
01:04:18,789 --> 01:04:16,720
rick was talking about children and he

2018
01:04:21,349 --> 01:04:18,799
was interacting i'm talking about

2019
01:04:23,029 --> 01:04:21,359
specifically like there was a being that

2020
01:04:24,870 --> 01:04:23,039
was very visual to you

2021
01:04:27,270 --> 01:04:24,880
looking straight at you kind of saying

2022
01:04:30,080 --> 01:04:27,280
hey i'm your guide or i'm here to

2023
01:04:32,150 --> 01:04:30,090
kind of help you with this experience um

2024
01:04:33,750 --> 01:04:32,160
[Music]

2025
01:04:36,950 --> 01:04:33,760
basically something like that nathan do

2026
01:04:39,190 --> 01:04:36,960
you remember anything like that

2027
01:04:39,990 --> 01:04:39,200
uh from from from what i remember right

2028
01:04:42,630 --> 01:04:40,000
now no

2029
01:04:44,069 --> 01:04:42,640
not in the strictest sense like not a a

2030
01:04:46,069 --> 01:04:44,079
humanoid bipedal being

2031
01:04:47,510 --> 01:04:46,079
like uh there was the experience on the

2032
01:04:49,349 --> 01:04:47,520
dmt where i

2033
01:04:51,109 --> 01:04:49,359
encountered this very intel

2034
01:04:54,230 --> 01:04:51,119
hyper-intelligent

2035
01:04:54,630 --> 01:04:54,240
uh very intelligent um that that it was

2036
01:04:59,270 --> 01:04:54,640
a

2037
01:05:01,430 --> 01:04:59,280
do you guys you guys might remember

2038
01:05:04,549 --> 01:05:01,440
maybe i remember it was very important

2039
01:05:05,430 --> 01:05:04,559
and uh it was very intelligent and it

2040
01:05:07,430 --> 01:05:05,440
was like i said it was a

2041
01:05:09,109 --> 01:05:07,440
it was a geometric shape of sorts or or

2042
01:05:09,829 --> 01:05:09,119
an undulate maybe a changing geometric

2043
01:05:11,270 --> 01:05:09,839
shape

2044
01:05:13,589 --> 01:05:11,280
and then these you know almost like

2045
01:05:15,430 --> 01:05:13,599
electrons flying around it and and

2046
01:05:16,789 --> 01:05:15,440
and it was conveying something but i

2047
01:05:17,670 --> 01:05:16,799
can't remember it's too long ago now i

2048
01:05:20,069 --> 01:05:17,680
feel bad

2049
01:05:21,589 --> 01:05:20,079
uh uh maybe maybe what maybe rick or you

2050
01:05:23,349 --> 01:05:21,599
or do you remember what that was but

2051
01:05:24,309 --> 01:05:23,359
other than that no nothing like a a

2052
01:05:26,309 --> 01:05:24,319
reptilian or

2053
01:05:27,829 --> 01:05:26,319
a gray or anything like that not not on

2054
01:05:29,589 --> 01:05:27,839
psychedelics

2055
01:05:31,029 --> 01:05:29,599
specifically no no i don't what about

2056
01:05:33,190 --> 01:05:31,039
you rick

2057
01:05:34,470 --> 01:05:33,200
no i don't i've never seen any kind of

2058
01:05:37,670 --> 01:05:34,480
being or anything

2059
01:05:42,789 --> 01:05:37,680
show before me now so

2060
01:05:47,589 --> 01:05:45,430
um i mean like i mean i can't say that i

2061
01:05:49,029 --> 01:05:47,599
feel like i've ever like hallucinated

2062
01:05:49,589 --> 01:05:49,039
well with you whatever board you want to

2063
01:05:52,230 --> 01:05:49,599
pick right

2064
01:05:54,549 --> 01:05:52,240
i've never i've never seen anything like

2065
01:05:56,870 --> 01:05:54,559
necessarily like appear in front of me

2066
01:05:58,470 --> 01:05:56,880
like in this reality like i'm like where

2067
01:05:59,270 --> 01:05:58,480
like if i'm sitting in your backyard for

2068
01:06:01,510 --> 01:05:59,280
example

2069
01:06:03,349 --> 01:06:01,520
and then i saw like a being or something

2070
01:06:04,710 --> 01:06:03,359
no i've never seen right no no i mean

2071
01:06:06,309 --> 01:06:04,720
it doesn't have to be industrial i'm

2072
01:06:07,829 --> 01:06:06,319
talking about wherever you shifted to

2073
01:06:10,549 --> 01:06:07,839
whatever you were doing

2074
01:06:11,990 --> 01:06:10,559
was was a visual if not was there at

2075
01:06:13,829 --> 01:06:12,000
least an auditory

2076
01:06:15,589 --> 01:06:13,839
guide well there's always well actually

2077
01:06:16,870 --> 01:06:15,599
i it's like i've referred to several

2078
01:06:19,109 --> 01:06:16,880
times there's that voice

2079
01:06:19,910 --> 01:06:19,119
that guides me through everything um and

2080
01:06:21,109 --> 01:06:19,920
that's there

2081
01:06:23,430 --> 01:06:21,119
actually through every experience i've

2082
01:06:25,190 --> 01:06:23,440
ever had it's always there um

2083
01:06:27,190 --> 01:06:25,200
but the closest i guess i could say than

2084
01:06:29,190 --> 01:06:27,200
to like having any kind of being

2085
01:06:30,390 --> 01:06:29,200
would be when i did uh ayahuasca and

2086
01:06:32,710 --> 01:06:30,400
peru um

2087
01:06:34,309 --> 01:06:32,720
i got a very clear mental almost like

2088
01:06:35,910 --> 01:06:34,319
kind of like i was dreaming

2089
01:06:38,069 --> 01:06:35,920
at the same time that i was awake it was

2090
01:06:39,829 --> 01:06:38,079
a very vivid image of what i considered

2091
01:06:41,510 --> 01:06:39,839
to be my higher self

2092
01:06:43,510 --> 01:06:41,520
um and i could describe to you what he

2093
01:06:45,910 --> 01:06:43,520
looked like he looked like me

2094
01:06:46,789 --> 01:06:45,920
um actually i even commented to him

2095
01:06:49,589 --> 01:06:46,799
about how he looked

2096
01:06:51,190 --> 01:06:49,599
he looked to me to be like an 18 year

2097
01:06:53,029 --> 01:06:51,200
old version of myself

2098
01:06:54,470 --> 01:06:53,039
but like was like in really like in

2099
01:06:56,150 --> 01:06:54,480
pretty good shape like he wasn't like

2100
01:06:57,750 --> 01:06:56,160
super muscular he's like the same size

2101
01:06:59,430 --> 01:06:57,760
as me i'm like an average guy

2102
01:07:00,789 --> 01:06:59,440
but he had like some tone on him you

2103
01:07:01,510 --> 01:07:00,799
know just a little bit of tone on his

2104
01:07:02,710 --> 01:07:01,520
arms

2105
01:07:04,309 --> 01:07:02,720
and his you know a little bit on his

2106
01:07:05,670 --> 01:07:04,319
stomach not like you know ripped or

2107
01:07:06,710 --> 01:07:05,680
anything but he just looked like he was

2108
01:07:09,029 --> 01:07:06,720
in good shape

2109
01:07:09,829 --> 01:07:09,039
his skin had absolutely no blemishes on

2110
01:07:11,910 --> 01:07:09,839
it he

2111
01:07:12,870 --> 01:07:11,920
his hair looked really nice and full he

2112
01:07:15,190 --> 01:07:12,880
looked healthy

2113
01:07:17,109 --> 01:07:15,200
he looked younger than me and he was

2114
01:07:19,270 --> 01:07:17,119
smarter and more secure than me

2115
01:07:20,230 --> 01:07:19,280
and i remember i asked him like he told

2116
01:07:23,109 --> 01:07:20,240
me like i'm you

2117
01:07:24,710 --> 01:07:23,119
and i was like well if you're me then

2118
01:07:26,549 --> 01:07:24,720
why don't i look like you because i'm

2119
01:07:27,589 --> 01:07:26,559
like at this time i'm like 32 i'm like a

2120
01:07:29,430 --> 01:07:27,599
little overweight

2121
01:07:30,710 --> 01:07:29,440
you know and he's like well you know

2122
01:07:32,150 --> 01:07:30,720
part of it's because you haven't been

2123
01:07:33,829 --> 01:07:32,160
living a healthy lifestyle you've

2124
01:07:34,630 --> 01:07:33,839
submitted yourself to working a job that

2125
01:07:36,230 --> 01:07:34,640
you hate

2126
01:07:38,150 --> 01:07:36,240
um you've been smoking you've been

2127
01:07:39,510 --> 01:07:38,160
drinking a lot so you know it's safe to

2128
01:07:41,029 --> 01:07:39,520
say that you really haven't been taking

2129
01:07:42,710 --> 01:07:41,039
care of yourself and i'm like yeah he's

2130
01:07:46,390 --> 01:07:42,720
like but the other thing is

2131
01:07:48,150 --> 01:07:46,400
that you're 32 years old and i was like

2132
01:07:49,510 --> 01:07:48,160
well i don't want to be 32 years old he

2133
01:07:51,109 --> 01:07:49,520
goes well yeah you do

2134
01:07:52,470 --> 01:07:51,119
i said well what do you mean i why do i

2135
01:07:54,309 --> 01:07:52,480
want to be that he's like because you

2136
01:07:56,230 --> 01:07:54,319
chose to be 32 years old

2137
01:07:57,910 --> 01:07:56,240
and i was like how did i choose to be 32

2138
01:07:59,270 --> 01:07:57,920
years old and that's when i was given

2139
01:08:01,190 --> 01:07:59,280
the images of like

2140
01:08:02,549 --> 01:08:01,200
drinking water and eating and doing

2141
01:08:03,750 --> 01:08:02,559
everything i do to survive on this

2142
01:08:04,230 --> 01:08:03,760
planet because he's like basically

2143
01:08:05,829 --> 01:08:04,240
saying

2144
01:08:07,270 --> 01:08:05,839
if you didn't want to be here you would

2145
01:08:08,870 --> 01:08:07,280
choose not to be here and you know how

2146
01:08:12,069 --> 01:08:08,880
you can choose not to be here

2147
01:08:16,070 --> 01:08:12,079
and i was like oh and we went into a

2148
01:08:20,789 --> 01:08:18,789
no good didn't you i mean oh okay i

2149
01:08:23,669 --> 01:08:20,799
wasn't sure if you want to get it

2150
01:08:24,229 --> 01:08:23,679
okay well so so anyway i was like he

2151
01:08:27,349 --> 01:08:24,239
started

2152
01:08:28,470 --> 01:08:27,359
he's like he basically like confirmed to

2153
01:08:30,390 --> 01:08:28,480
me he's like you know

2154
01:08:31,510 --> 01:08:30,400
like hey our time here is limited you

2155
01:08:33,030 --> 01:08:31,520
know so you know

2156
01:08:34,630 --> 01:08:33,040
i know everything seems very you know

2157
01:08:36,149 --> 01:08:34,640
like clear to you now but you know make

2158
01:08:36,789 --> 01:08:36,159
sure you get your questions answered

2159
01:08:38,070 --> 01:08:36,799
because

2160
01:08:39,430 --> 01:08:38,080
you know you're gonna forget most of

2161
01:08:41,269 --> 01:08:39,440
this when you go back you know how this

2162
01:08:42,950 --> 01:08:41,279
game works i was like okay

2163
01:08:44,870 --> 01:08:42,960
and i was like so he's like so he's like

2164
01:08:47,749 --> 01:08:44,880
basically he showed me this he's like

2165
01:08:48,630 --> 01:08:47,759
you chose to he said basically i exist

2166
01:08:51,269 --> 01:08:48,640
because of you

2167
01:08:51,990 --> 01:08:51,279
if you didn't exist i wouldn't exist i'm

2168
01:08:53,510 --> 01:08:52,000
a culmination

2169
01:08:55,349 --> 01:08:53,520
of all your experiences that you're

2170
01:08:57,669 --> 01:08:55,359
learning right now so

2171
01:08:59,110 --> 01:08:57,679
you chose to be 32 years old just like

2172
01:09:00,229 --> 01:08:59,120
you're going to choose to be 40 years

2173
01:09:01,189 --> 01:09:00,239
old just like you're going to choose to

2174
01:09:03,030 --> 01:09:01,199
be 50.

2175
01:09:04,950 --> 01:09:03,040
all of these experiences are different

2176
01:09:06,630 --> 01:09:04,960
because being a 50 year old is different

2177
01:09:08,789 --> 01:09:06,640
from being a 30 year old because

2178
01:09:10,709 --> 01:09:08,799
it's not just about like how you feel as

2179
01:09:11,829 --> 01:09:10,719
an old person but it's also how society

2180
01:09:13,669 --> 01:09:11,839
also looks at you

2181
01:09:15,510 --> 01:09:13,679
so you're gonna be growing you know

2182
01:09:16,309 --> 01:09:15,520
learning like as your body gets more

2183
01:09:18,550 --> 01:09:16,319
physically

2184
01:09:20,229 --> 01:09:18,560
you know hampered down you know you're

2185
01:09:21,910 --> 01:09:20,239
gonna feel the physical strain of being

2186
01:09:22,870 --> 01:09:21,920
50 your looks are going to change

2187
01:09:24,070 --> 01:09:22,880
people are going to look at you

2188
01:09:25,030 --> 01:09:24,080
differently but you're also going to

2189
01:09:26,390 --> 01:09:25,040
learn these things

2190
01:09:27,829 --> 01:09:26,400
all these different things that you're

2191
01:09:29,510 --> 01:09:27,839
learning are part of what makes your

2192
01:09:31,910 --> 01:09:29,520
learning experience here on earth

2193
01:09:33,430 --> 01:09:31,920
and you chose to be here so without you

2194
01:09:35,430 --> 01:09:33,440
i wouldn't exist

2195
01:09:37,349 --> 01:09:35,440
so you have to keep living so you chose

2196
01:09:39,669 --> 01:09:37,359
to be where you are because

2197
01:09:40,470 --> 01:09:39,679
that's what you chose to do and i was

2198
01:09:43,829 --> 01:09:40,480
like

2199
01:09:44,470 --> 01:09:43,839
the things that are physically straining

2200
01:09:45,749 --> 01:09:44,480
you are

2201
01:09:47,110 --> 01:09:45,759
like things that are happening on the

2202
01:09:48,470 --> 01:09:47,120
planet right now but that's not really

2203
01:09:49,510 --> 01:09:48,480
for us to discuss at the moment and

2204
01:09:50,229 --> 01:09:49,520
that's not something you're really going

2205
01:09:53,349 --> 01:09:50,239
to figure out

2206
01:09:55,510 --> 01:09:53,359
maybe necessarily in this lifetime so

2207
01:09:56,470 --> 01:09:55,520
you know just keep doing what you're

2208
01:09:58,149 --> 01:09:56,480
doing

2209
01:09:59,590 --> 01:09:58,159
you know and be proud of and he's like

2210
01:10:00,470 --> 01:09:59,600
you know and be proud of who you are you

2211
01:10:02,630 --> 01:10:00,480
know like you made

2212
01:10:04,550 --> 01:10:02,640
you finally left your job you know you

2213
01:10:05,270 --> 01:10:04,560
you you have the power to do what you

2214
01:10:08,070 --> 01:10:05,280
want you're just

2215
01:10:09,110 --> 01:10:08,080
you're afraid you know so just breaking

2216
01:10:10,550 --> 01:10:09,120
up recognize

2217
01:10:12,470 --> 01:10:10,560
you know what what you're capable of

2218
01:10:15,590 --> 01:10:12,480
doing it's

2219
01:10:18,709 --> 01:10:15,600
it's that simple and so

2220
01:10:21,910 --> 01:10:18,719
was was this experience more um

2221
01:10:25,189 --> 01:10:21,920
that you know did it kind of lead up uh

2222
01:10:26,390 --> 01:10:25,199
to to this you know or or did it did it

2223
01:10:29,510 --> 01:10:26,400
take a while to get there

2224
01:10:30,390 --> 01:10:29,520
that's fine absolutely so this happened

2225
01:10:33,669 --> 01:10:30,400
during the

2226
01:10:34,630 --> 01:10:33,679
the week that i spent um in an ayahuasca

2227
01:10:36,870 --> 01:10:34,640
center in peru

2228
01:10:38,149 --> 01:10:36,880
and so we drank three different nights

2229
01:10:40,310 --> 01:10:38,159
um and

2230
01:10:42,149 --> 01:10:40,320
i uh so the first it was almost like a

2231
01:10:43,590 --> 01:10:42,159
three-part series like it worked out

2232
01:10:46,390 --> 01:10:43,600
perfectly like that

2233
01:10:47,110 --> 01:10:46,400
like the first night i took it i freaked

2234
01:10:48,950 --> 01:10:47,120
out like

2235
01:10:50,229 --> 01:10:48,960
i would say generally on psychedelics

2236
01:10:52,709 --> 01:10:50,239
like before that i

2237
01:10:54,229 --> 01:10:52,719
i did pretty okay you know like i had

2238
01:10:55,750 --> 01:10:54,239
some things that were unnerving and made

2239
01:10:57,590 --> 01:10:55,760
me feel a little nervous but i didn't

2240
01:10:59,669 --> 01:10:57,600
feel like i freaked out ever but

2241
01:11:01,669 --> 01:10:59,679
this first night i had in ayahuasca in

2242
01:11:02,310 --> 01:11:01,679
peru just completely freaked me out

2243
01:11:04,630 --> 01:11:02,320
because

2244
01:11:06,149 --> 01:11:04,640
i had traveled by myself from colombia

2245
01:11:09,030 --> 01:11:06,159
to peru like by bus

2246
01:11:10,630 --> 01:11:09,040
and by a taxi and i think there and not

2247
01:11:11,270 --> 01:11:10,640
only that i had also quit and left my

2248
01:11:13,750 --> 01:11:11,280
job

2249
01:11:15,430 --> 01:11:13,760
so i completely jumped in a place where

2250
01:11:17,590 --> 01:11:15,440
like i wasn't even like

2251
01:11:19,110 --> 01:11:17,600
you know comfortable but like i was so

2252
01:11:20,790 --> 01:11:19,120
set on my goal like i'm not gonna be

2253
01:11:22,149 --> 01:11:20,800
afraid i'm going freaking south because

2254
01:11:24,390 --> 01:11:22,159
i said i'm doing that

2255
01:11:26,470 --> 01:11:24,400
and i did it and like there was a fear

2256
01:11:28,470 --> 01:11:26,480
that was chasing me the entire time

2257
01:11:30,630 --> 01:11:28,480
so when i did ayahuasca in peru my first

2258
01:11:32,950 --> 01:11:30,640
night all that fear

2259
01:11:34,470 --> 01:11:32,960
came back to me and exposed itself and

2260
01:11:36,470 --> 01:11:34,480
it reared its ugly head at me

2261
01:11:37,590 --> 01:11:36,480
and i had one of the most terrifying

2262
01:11:40,630 --> 01:11:37,600
experiences of

2263
01:11:42,630 --> 01:11:40,640
my life during that um

2264
01:11:44,550 --> 01:11:42,640
and like i spent my like night in the

2265
01:11:46,550 --> 01:11:44,560
bathroom by myself you know per the

2266
01:11:48,149 --> 01:11:46,560
experience you know per the the

2267
01:11:49,510 --> 01:11:48,159
permission of the ayahuasca centers like

2268
01:11:51,350 --> 01:11:49,520
can i go to the bathroom he said yeah

2269
01:11:52,709 --> 01:11:51,360
and then i was like stuck in there and

2270
01:11:55,510 --> 01:11:52,719
i felt like there was like something

2271
01:11:57,990 --> 01:11:55,520
breathing through me it was like a demon

2272
01:11:59,510 --> 01:11:58,000
oh man it was nuts and and like so the

2273
01:12:01,910 --> 01:11:59,520
first night was really bad

2274
01:12:03,030 --> 01:12:01,920
the second night was more kind of like a

2275
01:12:04,310 --> 01:12:03,040
like a bridge

2276
01:12:06,390 --> 01:12:04,320
like i remember like people would say

2277
01:12:07,990 --> 01:12:06,400
that when you do ayahuasca like you can

2278
01:12:09,910 --> 01:12:08,000
feel the spirit's fingers

2279
01:12:11,270 --> 01:12:09,920
like feeling over you and i remember

2280
01:12:12,310 --> 01:12:11,280
feeling like i felt like i was like

2281
01:12:14,070 --> 01:12:12,320
being scanned

2282
01:12:16,229 --> 01:12:14,080
so my second night was kind of i call it

2283
01:12:17,910 --> 01:12:16,239
the bridge the second night was me just

2284
01:12:19,669 --> 01:12:17,920
being calm and trying to understand what

2285
01:12:21,430 --> 01:12:19,679
the experience was doing to me

2286
01:12:23,270 --> 01:12:21,440
and then the third night was the night

2287
01:12:24,870 --> 01:12:23,280
where everything made sense and the

2288
01:12:26,390 --> 01:12:24,880
guide came to me and was like okay so

2289
01:12:28,470 --> 01:12:26,400
let's review what happened

2290
01:12:30,390 --> 01:12:28,480
and get you to understand why you had to

2291
01:12:32,630 --> 01:12:30,400
go through what you just went through

2292
01:12:34,470 --> 01:12:32,640
um so yeah it took three day two it was

2293
01:12:37,270 --> 01:12:34,480
my third day that led up to that

2294
01:12:37,910 --> 01:12:37,280
okay all right so uh uh nathan what

2295
01:12:41,430 --> 01:12:37,920
about you

2296
01:12:43,990 --> 01:12:41,440
regarding uh is

2297
01:12:45,510 --> 01:12:44,000
do you wanna maybe skip skip forward and

2298
01:12:47,510 --> 01:12:45,520
let's say

2299
01:12:48,790 --> 01:12:47,520
do you wanna share your negative

2300
01:12:50,390 --> 01:12:48,800
experiences because i know it's always

2301
01:12:53,110 --> 01:12:50,400
great to talk about the positive

2302
01:12:55,030 --> 01:12:53,120
and and and though they're i i believe

2303
01:12:55,910 --> 01:12:55,040
they're way more prevalent than negative

2304
01:12:57,590 --> 01:12:55,920
experiences

2305
01:12:59,750 --> 01:12:57,600
but do you want to jump to that and kind

2306
01:13:04,310 --> 01:12:59,760
of uh recall that uh

2307
01:13:08,229 --> 01:13:04,320
that cluster so i can't think of any

2308
01:13:09,030 --> 01:13:08,239
i mean man i i my mind works really well

2309
01:13:10,790 --> 01:13:09,040
at blocking out

2310
01:13:12,310 --> 01:13:10,800
negative memories like things that bad

2311
01:13:14,310 --> 01:13:12,320
have happened to me in my in

2312
01:13:15,590 --> 01:13:14,320
my life even growing up i i just don't

2313
01:13:17,669 --> 01:13:15,600
seem to remember them as well as i do

2314
01:13:18,950 --> 01:13:17,679
the positive ones i think that's that's

2315
01:13:21,590 --> 01:13:18,960
i think that works that way for

2316
01:13:23,590 --> 01:13:21,600
everybody um

2317
01:13:25,270 --> 01:13:23,600
i i could actually one thing that i that

2318
01:13:27,350 --> 01:13:25,280
rick kept when he was talking about this

2319
01:13:29,350 --> 01:13:27,360
it kept reminding me about another

2320
01:13:30,470 --> 01:13:29,360
uh experience that i would want to just

2321
01:13:31,910 --> 01:13:30,480
comment on briefly but

2322
01:13:33,590 --> 01:13:31,920
it was overwhelmingly positive not

2323
01:13:35,750 --> 01:13:33,600
negative yeah okay so

2324
01:13:38,070 --> 01:13:35,760
this was actually i guess the second

2325
01:13:40,470 --> 01:13:38,080
time i did mushrooms i did a lot less

2326
01:13:41,270 --> 01:13:40,480
um because i decided to share them with

2327
01:13:43,110 --> 01:13:41,280
my friends

2328
01:13:45,110 --> 01:13:43,120
and uh we got we went to the park we had

2329
01:13:48,229 --> 01:13:45,120
a great time we were looking at all the

2330
01:13:49,830 --> 01:13:48,239
beautiful beautiful the nature and just

2331
01:13:51,430 --> 01:13:49,840
being one with it and we could you know

2332
01:13:52,310 --> 01:13:51,440
feel it breathing and it was just felt

2333
01:13:55,189 --> 01:13:52,320
very

2334
01:13:57,189 --> 01:13:55,199
looked so interesting we wanted i

2335
01:13:59,270 --> 01:13:57,199
inspected everything every leaf every

2336
01:14:13,030 --> 01:13:59,280
bug so closely you know took everything

2337
01:14:19,030 --> 01:14:16,070
stopped and we're standing in a group

2338
01:14:20,149 --> 01:14:19,040
and i guess i i just assumed that these

2339
01:14:21,189 --> 01:14:20,159
guys were all experiencing the same

2340
01:14:24,550 --> 01:14:21,199
thing i was

2341
01:14:26,550 --> 01:14:24,560
and i had one of these experiences where

2342
01:14:28,229 --> 01:14:26,560
everything whether it was a guide or

2343
01:14:29,910 --> 01:14:28,239
what but it just

2344
01:14:31,430 --> 01:14:29,920
everything the answer to the universe

2345
01:14:32,870 --> 01:14:31,440
was just open to me and there there are

2346
01:14:36,149 --> 01:14:32,880
there is a term for it that in

2347
01:14:38,950 --> 01:14:36,159
in in mysticism uh i think the

2348
01:14:40,149 --> 01:14:38,960
uh hindu has hindis have a word for it

2349
01:14:42,790 --> 01:14:40,159
but i don't remember what it's called

2350
01:14:43,830 --> 01:14:42,800
anyway and everything was just open and

2351
01:14:46,709 --> 01:14:43,840
explained to me every

2352
01:14:47,430 --> 01:14:46,719
um everything i ever wanted to know the

2353
01:14:49,110 --> 01:14:47,440
purpose of

2354
01:14:51,030 --> 01:14:49,120
every little every blade of grass was

2355
01:14:52,550 --> 01:14:51,040
just there it was just it was made

2356
01:14:53,830 --> 01:14:52,560
obvious and clear to me and it's like oh

2357
01:14:55,110 --> 01:14:53,840
well of course that's why we're here

2358
01:14:57,110 --> 01:14:55,120
that's why we're doing this

2359
01:14:59,030 --> 01:14:57,120
man great and i thought for sure because

2360
01:15:01,110 --> 01:14:59,040
everything was so clear it was so

2361
01:15:02,229 --> 01:15:01,120
clear and evident to me that i would

2362
01:15:02,950 --> 01:15:02,239
remember this and i would be able to

2363
01:15:04,790 --> 01:15:02,960
explain it

2364
01:15:06,390 --> 01:15:04,800
but uh and then and then when it when it

2365
01:15:08,070 --> 01:15:06,400
started to fade i came back and i was

2366
01:15:09,430 --> 01:15:08,080
looked at my friends and i was like

2367
01:15:11,189 --> 01:15:09,440
well don't you know this is why we're

2368
01:15:12,070 --> 01:15:11,199
here this is what i do you guys saw it

2369
01:15:14,470 --> 01:15:12,080
too right and

2370
01:15:15,990 --> 01:15:14,480
and of course they didn't um and i've

2371
01:15:17,350 --> 01:15:16,000
had similar experience almost almost

2372
01:15:18,709 --> 01:15:17,360
every trip actually i have a moment like

2373
01:15:21,590 --> 01:15:18,719
that where things just become

2374
01:15:22,709 --> 01:15:21,600
super clear uh and and it's just like oh

2375
01:15:24,070 --> 01:15:22,719
well obviously this is

2376
01:15:25,430 --> 01:15:24,080
this is all makes perfect sense well

2377
01:15:26,709 --> 01:15:25,440
then it's there's no there's no reason

2378
01:15:28,149 --> 01:15:26,719
to be afraid we're

2379
01:15:30,790 --> 01:15:28,159
we yeah we chose to do this or whatever

2380
01:15:33,590 --> 01:15:30,800
the purpose is um

2381
01:15:34,950 --> 01:15:33,600
now negative experience is like i mean

2382
01:15:36,470 --> 01:15:34,960
like we were talking before the show

2383
01:15:37,669 --> 01:15:36,480
started there was one time i don't know

2384
01:15:38,709 --> 01:15:37,679
why i was possessed

2385
01:15:40,790 --> 01:15:38,719
maybe that's the right word i was

2386
01:15:42,070 --> 01:15:40,800
possessed uh rick and i took a little

2387
01:15:43,350 --> 01:15:42,080
bit of lsd and i wouldn't

2388
01:15:44,870 --> 01:15:43,360
first of all i don't recommend doing any

2389
01:15:45,590 --> 01:15:44,880
drugs i don't think they're necessary

2390
01:15:48,149 --> 01:15:45,600
you know i think

2391
01:15:49,669 --> 01:15:48,159
through meditation uh through just

2392
01:15:51,990 --> 01:15:49,679
spiritual experience i mean just

2393
01:15:54,630 --> 01:15:52,000
just just opening yourself up but if you

2394
01:15:56,870 --> 01:15:54,640
are i stay the hell away from

2395
01:15:58,310 --> 01:15:56,880
man-made ones start with all the all of

2396
01:15:58,630 --> 01:15:58,320
the things god put here you know what i

2397
01:16:01,270 --> 01:15:58,640
mean

2398
01:16:02,870 --> 01:16:01,280
if you feel adventurous it's on you you

2399
01:16:04,870 --> 01:16:02,880
know it's up to you but uh for whatever

2400
01:16:07,110 --> 01:16:04,880
reason one time i was possessed to

2401
01:16:08,470 --> 01:16:07,120
take more acid after we'd already taken

2402
01:16:10,149 --> 01:16:08,480
enough we probably took a hit

2403
01:16:12,070 --> 01:16:10,159
each maybe two i don't know you know it

2404
01:16:13,350 --> 01:16:12,080
was a little vile had about half full i

2405
01:16:14,470 --> 01:16:13,360
think it was 100 when it was full but it

2406
01:16:16,470 --> 01:16:14,480
had about half

2407
01:16:17,750 --> 01:16:16,480
and we just took a little drop and it

2408
01:16:19,189 --> 01:16:17,760
should have been fine and for whatever

2409
01:16:20,149 --> 01:16:19,199
reason i was possessed to take the rest

2410
01:16:22,630 --> 01:16:20,159
of it

2411
01:16:23,830 --> 01:16:22,640
um you just chug it i don't know yeah i

2412
01:16:25,030 --> 01:16:23,840
just took the rest of it you know

2413
01:16:25,990 --> 01:16:25,040
there's probably just a few drops left

2414
01:16:27,990 --> 01:16:26,000
in the bottom of the vial

2415
01:16:29,430 --> 01:16:28,000
i i ended up in the hospital that time

2416
01:16:31,510 --> 01:16:29,440
so um

2417
01:16:33,030 --> 01:16:31,520
and there was good experiences and

2418
01:16:34,709 --> 01:16:33,040
horrendous experiences with that oh i

2419
01:16:36,310 --> 01:16:34,719
absolutely did meet entities then

2420
01:16:37,830 --> 01:16:36,320
i forgot about that i was with these

2421
01:16:40,470 --> 01:16:37,840
guys this one was

2422
01:16:41,510 --> 01:16:40,480
and almost maybe like they were i don't

2423
01:16:43,910 --> 01:16:41,520
know different

2424
01:16:45,350 --> 01:16:43,920
archetypes of humanity maybe like there

2425
01:16:47,430 --> 01:16:45,360
was one that was like a

2426
01:16:49,270 --> 01:16:47,440
like he was like a big purple alien

2427
01:16:50,630 --> 01:16:49,280
looking thing but just like with

2428
01:16:52,470 --> 01:16:50,640
tentacles and he just looked like like

2429
01:16:55,910 --> 01:16:52,480
he was like the archetypal

2430
01:16:58,630 --> 01:16:55,920
of being uh

2431
01:17:00,310 --> 01:16:58,640
you know just gluttonous like just just

2432
01:17:01,030 --> 01:17:00,320
consuming everything that comes to him

2433
01:17:03,030 --> 01:17:01,040
you know and

2434
01:17:04,550 --> 01:17:03,040
and and i know we had a conversation but

2435
01:17:05,590 --> 01:17:04,560
man it was just it was too intense for

2436
01:17:06,870 --> 01:17:05,600
me to really bring back

2437
01:17:08,310 --> 01:17:06,880
and i rick might actually remember

2438
01:17:09,189 --> 01:17:08,320
better because he quizzed me on it after

2439
01:17:10,870 --> 01:17:09,199
i came back

2440
01:17:12,390 --> 01:17:10,880
and some of the experiences were very

2441
01:17:13,910 --> 01:17:12,400
moving and i encountered like three or

2442
01:17:15,110 --> 01:17:13,920
four different entities on that trip i

2443
01:17:18,229 --> 01:17:15,120
forgot about that

2444
01:17:19,590 --> 01:17:18,239
um it's just that it was so intense

2445
01:17:20,950 --> 01:17:19,600
and actually i kind of want to just

2446
01:17:22,229 --> 01:17:20,960
block that out from my memory because i

2447
01:17:23,510 --> 01:17:22,239
did end up in the hospital it would

2448
01:17:24,790 --> 01:17:23,520
change my life you know it's like one of

2449
01:17:26,950 --> 01:17:24,800
those things it's like all right

2450
01:17:28,950 --> 01:17:26,960
i i need to that's the last time i ever

2451
01:17:31,110 --> 01:17:28,960
touched anything like it you know so

2452
01:17:33,350 --> 01:17:31,120
um i don't know what possessed me what

2453
01:17:36,310 --> 01:17:33,360
overcame me to to do that but i did it

2454
01:17:36,630 --> 01:17:36,320
uh and if you don't want to get into it

2455
01:17:37,990 --> 01:17:36,640
but

2456
01:17:39,910 --> 01:17:38,000
do you mind sharing what happened at the

2457
01:17:43,189 --> 01:17:39,920
hospital oh at the hospital

2458
01:17:44,390 --> 01:17:43,199
well i remember you know so they i don't

2459
01:17:46,310 --> 01:17:44,400
remember anything i don't remember going

2460
01:17:47,669 --> 01:17:46,320
to the hospital all i do is remember

2461
01:17:50,630 --> 01:17:47,679
waking up in the hospital never being in

2462
01:17:52,950 --> 01:17:50,640
this bed and uh

2463
01:17:54,470 --> 01:17:52,960
they uh uh actually rick knows the story

2464
01:17:56,550 --> 01:17:54,480
better and uh

2465
01:17:57,590 --> 01:17:56,560
but it's uh like maybe what actually

2466
01:17:58,870 --> 01:17:57,600
happened at the hospital i don't know

2467
01:18:00,229 --> 01:17:58,880
keep that private rick because what he

2468
01:18:02,390 --> 01:18:00,239
explained to me i

2469
01:18:03,910 --> 01:18:02,400
i guess we could talk about it but uh

2470
01:18:05,830 --> 01:18:03,920
it's uh uh

2471
01:18:07,750 --> 01:18:05,840
the next thing i really remember is i

2472
01:18:10,390 --> 01:18:07,760
remember finally identifying where i was

2473
01:18:11,590 --> 01:18:10,400
and coming to you know and and but then

2474
01:18:13,030 --> 01:18:11,600
like going back out because it was still

2475
01:18:15,669 --> 01:18:13,040
kind of in waves and i had

2476
01:18:17,030 --> 01:18:15,679
you know i would talk with these

2477
01:18:18,470 --> 01:18:17,040
entities or whatever or have these

2478
01:18:21,910 --> 01:18:18,480
experiences and come back

2479
01:18:23,350 --> 01:18:21,920
and then uh you know evidently

2480
01:18:25,270 --> 01:18:23,360
yeah i wasn't making any sense talking

2481
01:18:26,709 --> 01:18:25,280
to the doctors and stuff and and

2482
01:18:27,910 --> 01:18:26,719
eventually just one of the i was like

2483
01:18:29,110 --> 01:18:27,920
i'm ready to go home and one of the

2484
01:18:30,630 --> 01:18:29,120
doctors like well you know where you are

2485
01:18:31,430 --> 01:18:30,640
and i looked out the window and i could

2486
01:18:35,110 --> 01:18:31,440
see

2487
01:18:35,830 --> 01:18:35,120
uh a a a monument that i i knew exactly

2488
01:18:36,950 --> 01:18:35,840
where i was

2489
01:18:38,070 --> 01:18:36,960
by seeing that i've seen it a million

2490
01:18:39,270 --> 01:18:38,080
times i've driven past it you know it's

2491
01:18:42,550 --> 01:18:39,280
the top of a building that i

2492
01:18:44,229 --> 01:18:42,560
recognize um and rick was actually on

2493
01:18:45,510 --> 01:18:44,239
lsd too so he said he kind of communed

2494
01:18:46,390 --> 01:18:45,520
with me and he realized that there was

2495
01:18:47,910 --> 01:18:46,400
some

2496
01:18:50,070 --> 01:18:47,920
other entity not a good one a very

2497
01:18:51,189 --> 01:18:50,080
demonic one like some sort of

2498
01:18:52,310 --> 01:18:51,199
you know like i said i think i went

2499
01:18:53,430 --> 01:18:52,320
through all the different archives of

2500
01:18:54,630 --> 01:18:53,440
humanity like and this was like the

2501
01:18:55,750 --> 01:18:54,640
pervert

2502
01:18:57,030 --> 01:18:55,760
entity or whatever all the different

2503
01:18:58,229 --> 01:18:57,040
demons of humanity the demons we

2504
01:18:59,110 --> 01:18:58,239
classify as demons whether they're good

2505
01:19:01,110 --> 01:18:59,120
or bad i don't know

2506
01:19:02,630 --> 01:19:01,120
you know who's to say uh are you sorry i

2507
01:19:05,830 --> 01:19:02,640
didn't talk about actual or

2508
01:19:07,030 --> 01:19:05,840
just like a representation of well no

2509
01:19:09,430 --> 01:19:07,040
it's felt like there is this

2510
01:19:10,870 --> 01:19:09,440
this entity with me right and and he and

2511
01:19:11,350 --> 01:19:10,880
he was kind of like i don't know if he

2512
01:19:13,270 --> 01:19:11,360
was

2513
01:19:14,470 --> 01:19:13,280
maybe possessing me if that's the right

2514
01:19:16,149 --> 01:19:14,480
word he was just like

2515
01:19:18,149 --> 01:19:16,159
super gluttonous and just consuming

2516
01:19:20,229 --> 01:19:18,159
everything just food and

2517
01:19:21,590 --> 01:19:20,239
and whatever garbage he could put into

2518
01:19:23,350 --> 01:19:21,600
his body maybe it was like

2519
01:19:25,110 --> 01:19:23,360
maybe it was representative of of me

2520
01:19:25,910 --> 01:19:25,120
trying to putting this much lsd in my

2521
01:19:29,189 --> 01:19:25,920
body

2522
01:19:31,750 --> 01:19:29,199
um and then uh uh

2523
01:19:32,950 --> 01:19:31,760
oh that was it was creepy it was life

2524
01:19:34,310 --> 01:19:32,960
changing

2525
01:19:35,270 --> 01:19:34,320
let's move to rick see if he remembers

2526
01:19:36,550 --> 01:19:35,280
anything more about that experience or

2527
01:19:38,950 --> 01:19:36,560
his own experiences

2528
01:19:41,590 --> 01:19:38,960
yeah rick what do you remember about

2529
01:19:44,870 --> 01:19:41,600
that about nathan's experience

2530
01:19:46,870 --> 01:19:44,880
yeah well i obviously wasn't in the same

2531
01:19:49,750 --> 01:19:46,880
like plane as he was but like

2532
01:19:50,070 --> 01:19:49,760
on on this plane it was like terrifying

2533
01:19:52,709 --> 01:19:50,080
like

2534
01:19:53,510 --> 01:19:52,719
what to see him going through that

2535
01:19:55,830 --> 01:19:53,520
because like

2536
01:19:56,950 --> 01:19:55,840
i remember like he didn't even like look

2537
01:19:58,950 --> 01:19:56,960
like himself

2538
01:20:01,350 --> 01:19:58,960
like like his eyes everything like even

2539
01:20:02,709 --> 01:20:01,360
he like it was like the shape of nathan

2540
01:20:05,590 --> 01:20:02,719
but it wasn't nathan like

2541
01:20:06,149 --> 01:20:05,600
just his eyes he looked like like like a

2542
01:20:07,910 --> 01:20:06,159
bird

2543
01:20:09,510 --> 01:20:07,920
or something it was really bizarre man

2544
01:20:12,229 --> 01:20:09,520
and like and he was like

2545
01:20:12,550 --> 01:20:12,239
like like it wasn't even him you know

2546
01:20:18,149 --> 01:20:12,560
like

2547
01:20:19,270 --> 01:20:18,159
took a little bit of lsd right because i

2548
01:20:21,030 --> 01:20:19,280
was thinking well you know i've got like

2549
01:20:22,709 --> 01:20:21,040
this creative video project i want to

2550
01:20:23,990 --> 01:20:22,719
work on maybe this might help me

2551
01:20:25,430 --> 01:20:24,000
i thought we were just going to chill

2552
01:20:27,189 --> 01:20:25,440
and have some music but like something

2553
01:20:27,669 --> 01:20:27,199
happened when i took a step outside and

2554
01:20:31,590 --> 01:20:27,679
he

2555
01:20:33,030 --> 01:20:31,600
ground like convulsing or something and

2556
01:20:34,550 --> 01:20:33,040
i was like what the heck and i'm like

2557
01:20:36,149 --> 01:20:34,560
looking around to see if like he took

2558
01:20:37,270 --> 01:20:36,159
something else like i didn't know and i

2559
01:20:40,470 --> 01:20:37,280
also i see this

2560
01:20:43,669 --> 01:20:40,480
empty vial of lsd and i was like

2561
01:20:47,590 --> 01:20:43,679
oh my god oh my god

2562
01:20:49,830 --> 01:20:47,600
no i was like why would you do that

2563
01:20:51,030 --> 01:20:49,840
and and so like i was like oh my god so

2564
01:20:52,390 --> 01:20:51,040
you know i had my brother

2565
01:20:54,229 --> 01:20:52,400
come over my brother had just gotten

2566
01:20:55,590 --> 01:20:54,239
back from thailand so this is like two

2567
01:20:57,750 --> 01:20:55,600
in the morning

2568
01:20:59,270 --> 01:20:57,760
and you know he's like jet lagged and he

2569
01:21:01,350 --> 01:20:59,280
lives right down the street so i'm like

2570
01:21:02,870 --> 01:21:01,360
can you come over here and tell me like

2571
01:21:03,990 --> 01:21:02,880
what's happening and like if do i need

2572
01:21:05,189 --> 01:21:04,000
to call somebody because

2573
01:21:07,189 --> 01:21:05,199
i don't know what's going on so my

2574
01:21:08,550 --> 01:21:07,199
brother comes over and sees this he's

2575
01:21:09,030 --> 01:21:08,560
like is this and he was like kind of

2576
01:21:20,709 --> 01:21:09,040
like

2577
01:21:22,070 --> 01:21:20,719
so i i called hold on a minute did you

2578
01:21:25,430 --> 01:21:22,080
hold on a minute i

2579
01:21:27,030 --> 01:21:25,440
i don't know how i even forget forgot

2580
01:21:29,430 --> 01:21:27,040
about this did you call me

2581
01:21:30,790 --> 01:21:29,440
i think you're trying to call me okay i

2582
01:21:32,310 --> 01:21:30,800
remember now oh my god how could i

2583
01:21:33,110 --> 01:21:32,320
forget about that because he was calling

2584
01:21:35,180 --> 01:21:33,120
me

2585
01:21:36,470 --> 01:21:35,190
you know and he was basically um

2586
01:21:38,149 --> 01:21:36,480
[Music]

2587
01:21:39,830 --> 01:21:38,159
you're saying it's like this is what's

2588
01:21:40,790 --> 01:21:39,840
happening i'm like yeah it's like what

2589
01:21:42,550 --> 01:21:40,800
should i do

2590
01:21:43,990 --> 01:21:42,560
i'm like what happened and he told me i

2591
01:21:45,590 --> 01:21:44,000
was like holy

2592
01:21:47,990 --> 01:21:45,600
you know it's like why would you do that

2593
01:21:49,990 --> 01:21:48,000
you know because it's i don't know like

2594
01:21:51,350 --> 01:21:50,000
it's one thing it's like i trust myself

2595
01:21:53,110 --> 01:21:51,360
to do stupid

2596
01:21:54,470 --> 01:21:53,120
when i'm by myself and no one else

2597
01:21:56,790 --> 01:21:54,480
around but it was

2598
01:21:58,470 --> 01:21:56,800
so unlike you and i was like man and he

2599
01:21:59,189 --> 01:21:58,480
was telling me about stuff and i'm just

2600
01:22:01,189 --> 01:21:59,199
like

2601
01:22:02,790 --> 01:22:01,199
well i was telling him it this way it's

2602
01:22:04,709 --> 01:22:02,800
like look

2603
01:22:06,310 --> 01:22:04,719
i think correct me if i'm wrong rick i

2604
01:22:08,870 --> 01:22:06,320
think i remember saying something

2605
01:22:10,310 --> 01:22:08,880
to you like it's one thing that if he's

2606
01:22:11,430 --> 01:22:10,320
going through experiences they need to

2607
01:22:13,830 --> 01:22:11,440
go through that

2608
01:22:15,590 --> 01:22:13,840
but if he does end up dying you know

2609
01:22:17,669 --> 01:22:15,600
there's a lot to be explained

2610
01:22:19,510 --> 01:22:17,679
that he's going to leave you behind

2611
01:22:22,629 --> 01:22:19,520
that's going to have to deal with that

2612
01:22:25,750 --> 01:22:22,639
so go ahead and call the hospital if i

2613
01:22:28,390 --> 01:22:25,760
if i remember that correctly uh uh

2614
01:22:29,830 --> 01:22:28,400
please clarify well yeah this at this

2615
01:22:31,510 --> 01:22:29,840
point we'd already been at the hospital

2616
01:22:32,470 --> 01:22:31,520
for several hours so you know my brother

2617
01:22:34,149 --> 01:22:32,480
came with me

2618
01:22:35,990 --> 01:22:34,159
you know and like i remember like after

2619
01:22:38,390 --> 01:22:36,000
being there and of course i

2620
01:22:39,270 --> 01:22:38,400
am i'm tripping too i've got lsd so i'm

2621
01:22:41,510 --> 01:22:39,280
trying to like

2622
01:22:42,870 --> 01:22:41,520
you know keep my cool and you know i'm

2623
01:22:43,350 --> 01:22:42,880
also worried like great are they going

2624
01:22:45,510 --> 01:22:43,360
to like

2625
01:22:47,030 --> 01:22:45,520
you know bust us all now for having like

2626
01:22:48,229 --> 01:22:47,040
some subs like i didn't know what was

2627
01:22:50,149 --> 01:22:48,239
going on i'm like i'm like

2628
01:22:52,070 --> 01:22:50,159
but i was seriously i was in the

2629
01:22:54,629 --> 01:22:52,080
position of i'm either gonna risk

2630
01:22:55,430 --> 01:22:54,639
going to jail for you know possessing or

2631
01:22:57,510 --> 01:22:55,440
having at least

2632
01:22:58,470 --> 01:22:57,520
indulged in some kind of federally

2633
01:23:00,790 --> 01:22:58,480
scheduled drug

2634
01:23:02,790 --> 01:23:00,800
or you know my friend's gonna die and

2635
01:23:03,350 --> 01:23:02,800
i'm gonna go into jail for life for that

2636
01:23:06,950 --> 01:23:03,360
like

2637
01:23:07,910 --> 01:23:06,960
friend die i don't care what happens

2638
01:23:09,750 --> 01:23:07,920
this is not

2639
01:23:11,030 --> 01:23:09,760
what's gonna happen so i call but i'm

2640
01:23:12,790 --> 01:23:11,040
also freaking out

2641
01:23:14,229 --> 01:23:12,800
you know that he's gonna die or if he

2642
01:23:14,790 --> 01:23:14,239
doesn't die we're both gonna get in

2643
01:23:16,470 --> 01:23:14,800
trouble

2644
01:23:17,990 --> 01:23:16,480
or you know he's gonna die and i'm gonna

2645
01:23:20,310 --> 01:23:18,000
get i was i was i

2646
01:23:21,030 --> 01:23:20,320
had to keep myself so cool and i

2647
01:23:22,470 --> 01:23:21,040
remember like

2648
01:23:23,910 --> 01:23:22,480
sitting in the chair and the doctors

2649
01:23:25,430 --> 01:23:23,920
were trying to ask me what happened i

2650
01:23:26,149 --> 01:23:25,440
couldn't even remember what happened

2651
01:23:27,750 --> 01:23:26,159
because i'm like

2652
01:23:29,510 --> 01:23:27,760
i remember at one point sitting in the

2653
01:23:30,550 --> 01:23:29,520
chair like just going through my mind

2654
01:23:32,709 --> 01:23:30,560
and like i saw like

2655
01:23:34,870 --> 01:23:32,719
this chair like the floor was even

2656
01:23:36,390 --> 01:23:34,880
moving and at one point there was like a

2657
01:23:37,270 --> 01:23:36,400
light that started appearing in front of

2658
01:23:40,310 --> 01:23:37,280
me i'm like no no

2659
01:23:42,709 --> 01:23:40,320
come on not now please okay i hate to

2660
01:23:44,310 --> 01:23:42,719
focus on this reality right now

2661
01:23:45,750 --> 01:23:44,320
you know and everything ended up being

2662
01:23:46,950 --> 01:23:45,760
fine even my brother told me goes

2663
01:23:48,709 --> 01:23:46,960
actually rick he goes

2664
01:23:50,070 --> 01:23:48,719
you are actually behaving quite fine

2665
01:23:50,790 --> 01:23:50,080
like i wouldn't have even known you were

2666
01:23:52,149 --> 01:23:50,800
on a drug

2667
01:23:53,430 --> 01:23:52,159
so i think everything was okay i was

2668
01:23:54,870 --> 01:23:53,440
like okay he's like yeah you actually

2669
01:23:56,310 --> 01:23:54,880
handled yourself pretty well on it i

2670
01:23:58,229 --> 01:23:56,320
said all right well thanks because

2671
01:24:00,229 --> 01:23:58,239
there was some weird there's some weird

2672
01:24:01,030 --> 01:24:00,239
happening in my brain but nobody

2673
01:24:04,229 --> 01:24:01,040
noticed it

2674
01:24:06,390 --> 01:24:04,239
how could he know if he was also no

2675
01:24:09,270 --> 01:24:06,400
carrie my brother wasn't on it

2676
01:24:10,629 --> 01:24:09,280
oh okay no you called him that's right

2677
01:24:12,629 --> 01:24:10,639
yeah he came over because i said i need

2678
01:24:13,990 --> 01:24:12,639
a sober mind to analyze the situation

2679
01:24:14,870 --> 01:24:14,000
because i think i'm freaking out i'm not

2680
01:24:16,870 --> 01:24:14,880
in a position

2681
01:24:18,709 --> 01:24:16,880
to be making any kind of calls right now

2682
01:24:21,830 --> 01:24:18,719
i didn't know this was going to happen

2683
01:24:22,790 --> 01:24:21,840
you know and so like so anyway i'm sorry

2684
01:24:24,310 --> 01:24:22,800
man

2685
01:24:25,669 --> 01:24:24,320
well i'm just glad it didn't turn out

2686
01:24:26,390 --> 01:24:25,679
worse because it could have been worse

2687
01:24:28,550 --> 01:24:26,400
you know and

2688
01:24:29,510 --> 01:24:28,560
and so like but anyway i remember i had

2689
01:24:30,870 --> 01:24:29,520
to take a break

2690
01:24:32,870 --> 01:24:30,880
i had to go i was like carrie can you

2691
01:24:35,590 --> 01:24:32,880
just like sit here for a minute

2692
01:24:37,030 --> 01:24:35,600
and like you know he's like yeah because

2693
01:24:38,629 --> 01:24:37,040
that's when i took one outside to take a

2694
01:24:39,189 --> 01:24:38,639
breather out don i called you or on the

2695
01:24:42,229 --> 01:24:39,199
phone

2696
01:24:43,189 --> 01:24:42,239
so you know so nathan's in icu right so

2697
01:24:45,030 --> 01:24:43,199
there's like you know

2698
01:24:46,229 --> 01:24:45,040
all these different beds that are around

2699
01:24:48,310 --> 01:24:46,239
right and

2700
01:24:49,270 --> 01:24:48,320
like all these people are laying around

2701
01:24:50,470 --> 01:24:49,280
and i walk in

2702
01:24:52,070 --> 01:24:50,480
and my brother's just sitting there

2703
01:24:54,390 --> 01:24:52,080
looking with this horrified look on his

2704
01:24:56,310 --> 01:24:54,400
face

2705
01:25:00,310 --> 01:24:56,320
and but i remember like nathan nathan

2706
01:25:04,149 --> 01:25:02,709
it was whoa it was so weird yeah oh it's

2707
01:25:05,350 --> 01:25:04,159
great and my brother i was like harry

2708
01:25:08,629 --> 01:25:05,360
what's going on he gets he goes

2709
01:25:09,910 --> 01:25:08,639
ricky's he's like speaking some weird

2710
01:25:11,590 --> 01:25:09,920
languages like it's like he's having

2711
01:25:12,550 --> 01:25:11,600
like conversations with things i swear

2712
01:25:14,310 --> 01:25:12,560
to god's like really

2713
01:25:15,669 --> 01:25:14,320
you know he's like talking to something

2714
01:25:17,350 --> 01:25:15,679
and he's like speaking in like

2715
01:25:18,790 --> 01:25:17,360
different languages like it's like

2716
01:25:20,709 --> 01:25:18,800
really freaking weird i was like

2717
01:25:22,470 --> 01:25:20,719
and i remember in the s when i remember

2718
01:25:23,990 --> 01:25:22,480
nathan had his

2719
01:25:27,270 --> 01:25:24,000
his eyes were closed and his head was

2720
01:25:30,310 --> 01:25:28,790
and then he turned his head to the other

2721
01:25:31,750 --> 01:25:30,320
side he goes yeah that's interesting

2722
01:25:33,910 --> 01:25:31,760
that's really interesting i was

2723
01:25:36,950 --> 01:25:33,920
like holy

2724
01:25:38,629 --> 01:25:36,960
i was like oh my god like it's so

2725
01:25:39,990 --> 01:25:38,639
eventually the doctors come and start

2726
01:25:41,669 --> 01:25:40,000
asking like all right so

2727
01:25:43,189 --> 01:25:41,679
what's his name what's his name's nathan

2728
01:25:44,709 --> 01:25:43,199
all right nathan you know

2729
01:25:46,390 --> 01:25:44,719
nathan where are you from you're like

2730
01:25:49,350 --> 01:25:46,400
what state you're from you're like

2731
01:25:51,510 --> 01:25:49,360
missouri and you're like what what part

2732
01:25:54,950 --> 01:25:51,520
what city of missouri he goes

2733
01:25:56,709 --> 01:25:54,960
reality he's like reality reality

2734
01:25:58,470 --> 01:25:56,719
because you're from reality in missouri

2735
01:26:00,229 --> 01:25:58,480
and you're like yeah yeah that's where

2736
01:26:02,550 --> 01:26:00,239
i'm from

2737
01:26:04,070 --> 01:26:02,560
i was like so eventually the doctors

2738
01:26:05,510 --> 01:26:04,080
like transferred him

2739
01:26:07,510 --> 01:26:05,520
and there was another doctor that came

2740
01:26:09,590 --> 01:26:07,520
to me and was like i just want to thank

2741
01:26:11,189 --> 01:26:09,600
you very much for bringing him in today

2742
01:26:13,030 --> 01:26:11,199
i know that was probably very hard for

2743
01:26:13,590 --> 01:26:13,040
you to do but he really needed to come

2744
01:26:15,350 --> 01:26:13,600
in here

2745
01:26:16,950 --> 01:26:15,360
um do you have any contact with his

2746
01:26:18,629 --> 01:26:16,960
parents i was like my god you know

2747
01:26:20,229 --> 01:26:18,639
i'm gonna have to contact his parents

2748
01:26:21,990 --> 01:26:20,239
because it's labor day and they probably

2749
01:26:23,270 --> 01:26:22,000
i know he's got plans with him they're

2750
01:26:23,910 --> 01:26:23,280
going to wonder where the hell he is i'm

2751
01:26:25,270 --> 01:26:23,920
like great

2752
01:26:27,750 --> 01:26:25,280
you know here we are in our 30s and i

2753
01:26:30,550 --> 01:26:27,760
got to call his parents you know so

2754
01:26:33,110 --> 01:26:30,560
i did i haven't called his dad you know

2755
01:26:34,709 --> 01:26:33,120
i had to admit to him what happened and

2756
01:26:36,070 --> 01:26:34,719
you know it was an awkward conversation

2757
01:26:37,669 --> 01:26:36,080
but a good thing they sent them there

2758
01:26:39,270 --> 01:26:37,679
because apparently he told me he had to

2759
01:26:40,390 --> 01:26:39,280
go on a breathing machine and all this

2760
01:26:42,950 --> 01:26:40,400
stuff so

2761
01:26:44,470 --> 01:26:42,960
it got serious and got really serious

2762
01:26:48,070 --> 01:26:44,480
wait did you

2763
01:26:49,669 --> 01:26:48,080
how far did you die no i don't think so

2764
01:26:51,270 --> 01:26:49,679
no i do remember the nurses did tell me

2765
01:26:53,430 --> 01:26:51,280
i was speaking different languages right

2766
01:26:55,189 --> 01:26:53,440
and then uh and you know at that point

2767
01:26:57,590 --> 01:26:55,199
you didn't speak it differently i spoke

2768
01:26:59,590 --> 01:26:57,600
i was learning spanish oh okay but but i

2769
01:27:02,629 --> 01:26:59,600
didn't speak it fluently yeah but i do

2770
01:27:04,629 --> 01:27:02,639
um it wasn't spanish you spoke then

2771
01:27:05,830 --> 01:27:04,639
no the one nurse evidently absolutely

2772
01:27:08,550 --> 01:27:05,840
identified it to spanish

2773
01:27:09,189 --> 01:27:08,560
yeah one the one language but um and

2774
01:27:11,270 --> 01:27:09,199
then uh

2775
01:27:12,950 --> 01:27:11,280
and i do there was like a positive

2776
01:27:15,590 --> 01:27:12,960
takeaway from that

2777
01:27:17,270 --> 01:27:15,600
but it man and par part of it is i just

2778
01:27:19,270 --> 01:27:17,280
don't i don't need

2779
01:27:20,310 --> 01:27:19,280
drugs or psychedelics or anything

2780
01:27:21,990 --> 01:27:20,320
anymore um

2781
01:27:24,229 --> 01:27:22,000
and maybe i just scared myself straight

2782
01:27:27,510 --> 01:27:24,239
you know that was just too much

2783
01:27:28,390 --> 01:27:27,520
so yeah you know i'm glad yeah it's not

2784
01:27:31,430 --> 01:27:28,400
about me

2785
01:27:33,030 --> 01:27:31,440
you know but i'm um i'm glad i did the

2786
01:27:34,629 --> 01:27:33,040
up on my own

2787
01:27:36,229 --> 01:27:34,639
so if something was gonna happen it

2788
01:27:38,149 --> 01:27:36,239
would just be me not everyone wants to

2789
01:27:39,750 --> 01:27:38,159
evolve you guys go out to the whole new

2790
01:27:41,189 --> 01:27:39,760
level it's like let's get

2791
01:27:43,430 --> 01:27:41,199
everyone because i got called your

2792
01:27:45,110 --> 01:27:43,440
parents got called everything was going

2793
01:27:47,510 --> 01:27:45,120
on i was like

2794
01:27:48,470 --> 01:27:47,520
i'm i'm just glad that at least for a

2795
01:27:50,310 --> 01:27:48,480
very selfish

2796
01:27:52,070 --> 01:27:50,320
reason you're still here you went

2797
01:27:53,830 --> 01:27:52,080
through whatever you went through

2798
01:27:55,360 --> 01:27:53,840
whatever you got out of it to get out of

2799
01:27:58,149 --> 01:27:55,370
it you know and um

2800
01:28:00,310 --> 01:27:58,159
[Music]

2801
01:28:01,510 --> 01:28:00,320
it just cracks me up because i i see it

2802
01:28:03,030 --> 01:28:01,520
in a

2803
01:28:04,629 --> 01:28:03,040
because you know how we usually are

2804
01:28:07,110 --> 01:28:04,639
we're just everything is

2805
01:28:09,030 --> 01:28:07,120
fun joke and all that and it's like when

2806
01:28:10,310 --> 01:28:09,040
we know each other and someone says oh

2807
01:28:12,550 --> 01:28:10,320
so-and-so's did this

2808
01:28:13,590 --> 01:28:12,560
it's even that much fun you're like yep

2809
01:28:17,590 --> 01:28:13,600
you know

2810
01:28:19,350 --> 01:28:17,600
about this part

2811
01:28:21,110 --> 01:28:19,360
because it's like we all know kind of

2812
01:28:22,550 --> 01:28:21,120
each other's silliness you know and so

2813
01:28:25,270 --> 01:28:22,560
if we

2814
01:28:27,189 --> 01:28:25,280
kind of do an exaggerated version of how

2815
01:28:28,390 --> 01:28:27,199
we kind of generally are that makes it

2816
01:28:30,229 --> 01:28:28,400
that much more funny

2817
01:28:31,669 --> 01:28:30,239
although somebody watching they might be

2818
01:28:33,750 --> 01:28:31,679
like that's not funny like

2819
01:28:34,790 --> 01:28:33,760
you went to a hospital this happened

2820
01:28:36,709 --> 01:28:34,800
that happened

2821
01:28:38,310 --> 01:28:36,719
what is so funny about that but like

2822
01:28:39,830 --> 01:28:38,320
they always say sometimes you just gotta

2823
01:28:45,270 --> 01:28:39,840
laugh about life

2824
01:28:49,430 --> 01:28:47,590
right i can tell because when when you

2825
01:28:52,310 --> 01:28:49,440
had called me you know you were

2826
01:28:53,669 --> 01:28:52,320
you were you know talking and and i was

2827
01:28:55,510 --> 01:28:53,679
genuinely trying to

2828
01:28:57,270 --> 01:28:55,520
because it was late and i was wondering

2829
01:28:58,950 --> 01:28:57,280
like rick usually doesn't call me this

2830
01:29:01,350 --> 01:28:58,960
late but i know you're up

2831
01:29:02,870 --> 01:29:01,360
and i was like what's going on you know

2832
01:29:04,390 --> 01:29:02,880
you know i was trying to

2833
01:29:06,950 --> 01:29:04,400
i think i must have missed you call the

2834
01:29:08,390 --> 01:29:06,960
first time so i called back because i

2835
01:29:10,070 --> 01:29:08,400
thought it was something more serious so

2836
01:29:13,270 --> 01:29:10,080
if it's something that

2837
01:29:15,590 --> 01:29:13,280
you know you would need me to do

2838
01:29:18,310 --> 01:29:15,600
this point that i wanted to save for

2839
01:29:21,669 --> 01:29:18,320
last is

2840
01:29:23,350 --> 01:29:21,679
what lessened lessons throughout all

2841
01:29:24,629 --> 01:29:23,360
these different journeys that you've

2842
01:29:27,270 --> 01:29:24,639
learned

2843
01:29:30,950 --> 01:29:27,280
can you definitely say you've taken them

2844
01:29:34,629 --> 01:29:32,950
does that make sense sure yeah okay

2845
01:29:37,189 --> 01:29:34,639
nathan do you want to start

2846
01:29:38,390 --> 01:29:37,199
yeah well it's it's difficult for me to

2847
01:29:41,270 --> 01:29:38,400
go from that

2848
01:29:42,709 --> 01:29:41,280
story to this but i guess the the main

2849
01:29:44,310 --> 01:29:42,719
thing is is that

2850
01:29:46,070 --> 01:29:44,320
it doesn't have to be a particular order

2851
01:29:48,310 --> 01:29:46,080
it could be just pick

2852
01:29:49,669 --> 01:29:48,320
certain things that you've learned and

2853
01:29:49,990 --> 01:29:49,679
you're like i'm going to take this with

2854
01:29:52,390 --> 01:29:50,000
me

2855
01:29:53,030 --> 01:29:52,400
well just in general psychedelics and i

2856
01:29:54,550 --> 01:29:53,040
wouldn't say

2857
01:29:56,390 --> 01:29:54,560
they've taught me directly but maybe

2858
01:29:58,229 --> 01:29:56,400
they were the key that i needed to just

2859
01:29:59,189 --> 01:29:58,239
open up my awareness to something that i

2860
01:30:01,189 --> 01:29:59,199
already knew

2861
01:30:02,550 --> 01:30:01,199
that's kind of what it always has come

2862
01:30:03,590 --> 01:30:02,560
to me as it's just something like you

2863
01:30:05,990 --> 01:30:03,600
already know this

2864
01:30:07,350 --> 01:30:06,000
you know this like like i don't know why

2865
01:30:08,629 --> 01:30:07,360
you play these games and you act like

2866
01:30:11,590 --> 01:30:08,639
you don't but you do

2867
01:30:11,990 --> 01:30:11,600
and and and and just just don't forget

2868
01:30:15,270 --> 01:30:12,000
and

2869
01:30:17,830 --> 01:30:15,280
remember you know remember

2870
01:30:18,709 --> 01:30:17,840
that that it does have a purpose there

2871
01:30:20,229 --> 01:30:18,719
is an order

2872
01:30:22,070 --> 01:30:20,239
there it doesn't matter how chaotic

2873
01:30:23,350 --> 01:30:22,080
things seem it there is an order it does

2874
01:30:25,830 --> 01:30:23,360
have a purpose

2875
01:30:26,550 --> 01:30:25,840
uh keep moving forward in a positive

2876
01:30:28,310 --> 01:30:26,560
direction

2877
01:30:29,910 --> 01:30:28,320
you know um whatever you think is

2878
01:30:31,510 --> 01:30:29,920
positive you know i guess i guess that's

2879
01:30:32,310 --> 01:30:31,520
that piece but it that is important is

2880
01:30:36,310 --> 01:30:32,320
to like

2881
01:30:38,229 --> 01:30:36,320
to be up to live proactively um

2882
01:30:39,669 --> 01:30:38,239
and uh i'm sure there's there's other

2883
01:30:41,590 --> 01:30:39,679
that will come to me but that that's

2884
01:30:43,830 --> 01:30:41,600
that's mainly that i get that sort of

2885
01:30:45,270 --> 01:30:43,840
almost every time just sort of or i even

2886
01:30:47,590 --> 01:30:45,280
get that on weed sometimes

2887
01:30:48,870 --> 01:30:47,600
like just sort of this there's there is

2888
01:30:52,149 --> 01:30:48,880
a purpose

2889
01:30:55,350 --> 01:30:52,159
it's good it's it is good whatever it is

2890
01:30:58,790 --> 01:30:55,360
there's and it's uh uh live proactively

2891
01:31:02,229 --> 01:30:58,800
and live in love be loving and kind okay

2892
01:31:03,350 --> 01:31:02,239
well actually uh um for totally forgot

2893
01:31:06,629 --> 01:31:03,360
to ask

2894
01:31:09,910 --> 01:31:06,639
i don't want to skip over wheat so um

2895
01:31:11,270 --> 01:31:09,920
um dude you know

2896
01:31:13,110 --> 01:31:11,280
we'll get back to that let me get the

2897
01:31:14,550 --> 01:31:13,120
answer from from rick first so

2898
01:31:16,709 --> 01:31:14,560
uh rick what about you was there

2899
01:31:19,590 --> 01:31:16,719
anything specific that like i said

2900
01:31:21,110 --> 01:31:19,600
that you've taken uh from many different

2901
01:31:24,149 --> 01:31:21,120
journeys and you basically

2902
01:31:25,910 --> 01:31:24,159
have applied it to your life yeah for me

2903
01:31:26,629 --> 01:31:25,920
it's actually a perspective more on like

2904
01:31:29,350 --> 01:31:26,639
how people

2905
01:31:30,629 --> 01:31:29,360
operate you know i feel like you know

2906
01:31:32,229 --> 01:31:30,639
all these things that we've discussed

2907
01:31:33,830 --> 01:31:32,239
about you know are kind of you know

2908
01:31:35,350 --> 01:31:33,840
laughing matters exciting kind of a

2909
01:31:36,870 --> 01:31:35,360
light show so to speak

2910
01:31:38,709 --> 01:31:36,880
um and that's all kind of entertaining

2911
01:31:39,590 --> 01:31:38,719
to talk about so long as we survive it

2912
01:31:42,390 --> 01:31:39,600
right

2913
01:31:44,550 --> 01:31:42,400
but um but actually i think the biggest

2914
01:31:46,149 --> 01:31:44,560
thing i got from it was um

2915
01:31:48,229 --> 01:31:46,159
really how to deal with other people i

2916
01:31:50,149 --> 01:31:48,239
actually felt like my dmt experience for

2917
01:31:52,870 --> 01:31:50,159
example was a direct result of how i

2918
01:31:54,790 --> 01:31:52,880
like handled my job uh when i worked at

2919
01:31:57,110 --> 01:31:54,800
uh when i worked in retail

2920
01:31:58,070 --> 01:31:57,120
as a customer service representative

2921
01:32:00,790 --> 01:31:58,080
because i realized

2922
01:32:01,510 --> 01:32:00,800
that like i feel like well actually it's

2923
01:32:03,830 --> 01:32:01,520
true our

2924
01:32:06,070 --> 01:32:03,840
life is a psychedelic experience because

2925
01:32:07,350 --> 01:32:06,080
our bodies are made up of chemicals

2926
01:32:08,709 --> 01:32:07,360
you know and even from like you know

2927
01:32:09,750 --> 01:32:08,719
going from male to female you know

2928
01:32:11,430 --> 01:32:09,760
there's slightly

2929
01:32:13,110 --> 01:32:11,440
different measurements of certain types

2930
01:32:14,709 --> 01:32:13,120
of chemicals in each one of us

2931
01:32:15,910 --> 01:32:14,719
therefore that's why i even come to

2932
01:32:16,390 --> 01:32:15,920
conclusion oh my god that's why the

2933
01:32:17,990 --> 01:32:16,400
female

2934
01:32:19,430 --> 01:32:18,000
like well we have other reasons too but

2935
01:32:21,830 --> 01:32:19,440
like that's also why we might

2936
01:32:23,510 --> 01:32:21,840
not necessarily understand how females

2937
01:32:25,030 --> 01:32:23,520
think or why females wonder why men

2938
01:32:25,990 --> 01:32:25,040
think the way they do because i feel

2939
01:32:27,990 --> 01:32:26,000
like it's probably

2940
01:32:29,590 --> 01:32:28,000
something to do with the different

2941
01:32:31,350 --> 01:32:29,600
balance of chemicals that we have so we

2942
01:32:33,990 --> 01:32:31,360
all share a very similar experience

2943
01:32:35,189 --> 01:32:34,000
as males explain uh females have that

2944
01:32:36,950 --> 01:32:35,199
other experience and then of course that

2945
01:32:37,270 --> 01:32:36,960
gets into the whole debate we have now

2946
01:32:39,270 --> 01:32:37,280
of

2947
01:32:40,870 --> 01:32:39,280
what is male and female there's probably

2948
01:32:42,149 --> 01:32:40,880
a good like there might be a good reason

2949
01:32:43,750 --> 01:32:42,159
for that in regard to like

2950
01:32:45,270 --> 01:32:43,760
the chemical aspect not just the

2951
01:32:46,790 --> 01:32:45,280
biological aspect

2952
01:32:49,430 --> 01:32:46,800
but like when it comes to dealing with

2953
01:32:51,110 --> 01:32:49,440
the customer too i realize like you know

2954
01:32:52,950 --> 01:32:51,120
they're like i got this idea from

2955
01:32:54,790 --> 01:32:52,960
psychedelic experiences that like i feel

2956
01:32:56,870 --> 01:32:54,800
like everybody has like a core

2957
01:32:58,790 --> 01:32:56,880
that runs through them like that makes

2958
01:33:00,870 --> 01:32:58,800
up themselves like who they are as a

2959
01:33:01,669 --> 01:33:00,880
self as their true that their true

2960
01:33:03,189 --> 01:33:01,679
selves

2961
01:33:05,430 --> 01:33:03,199
and like we have all these different

2962
01:33:07,990 --> 01:33:05,440
things that can like rattle that

2963
01:33:09,910 --> 01:33:08,000
that that can rattle that that that rod

2964
01:33:11,830 --> 01:33:09,920
and go around it and disrupt it and

2965
01:33:13,510 --> 01:33:11,840
it comes from many different reasons but

2966
01:33:14,870 --> 01:33:13,520
like for example like when a customer

2967
01:33:16,709 --> 01:33:14,880
comes into the store

2968
01:33:18,149 --> 01:33:16,719
and they start freaking out about you

2969
01:33:19,590 --> 01:33:18,159
know a product that you know they gotta

2970
01:33:20,790 --> 01:33:19,600
return or they don't like the fact that

2971
01:33:22,310 --> 01:33:20,800
the lines too long

2972
01:33:23,990 --> 01:33:22,320
they start yelling and screaming or

2973
01:33:24,950 --> 01:33:24,000
whatever it is and i looked at that

2974
01:33:26,709 --> 01:33:24,960
person i realized

2975
01:33:28,149 --> 01:33:26,719
oh my god this person's having a

2976
01:33:29,669 --> 01:33:28,159
psychedelic experience

2977
01:33:31,110 --> 01:33:29,679
what do i do when the person when you

2978
01:33:33,110 --> 01:33:31,120
know one of my friends is having a bad

2979
01:33:34,470 --> 01:33:33,120
time during a psychedelic experience

2980
01:33:35,750 --> 01:33:34,480
you sit there and you help them and you

2981
01:33:36,310 --> 01:33:35,760
balance them you just let them go

2982
01:33:38,070 --> 01:33:36,320
through it

2983
01:33:39,669 --> 01:33:38,080
and then bring them back to earth and i

2984
01:33:40,310 --> 01:33:39,679
remember like not long after my first

2985
01:33:42,149 --> 01:33:40,320
mushroom

2986
01:33:43,910 --> 01:33:42,159
or the dmt trip i had this experience

2987
01:33:45,510 --> 01:33:43,920
with this woman who was mad that we

2988
01:33:47,910 --> 01:33:45,520
wouldn't put a rope

2989
01:33:49,189 --> 01:33:47,920
to guide people and she's like you know

2990
01:33:50,629 --> 01:33:49,199
i just why don't you put i was a

2991
01:33:52,229 --> 01:33:50,639
supervisor too and she's like

2992
01:33:53,990 --> 01:33:52,239
why why don't you put a sign there i'm

2993
01:33:54,709 --> 01:33:54,000
like i said i understand ma'am i know

2994
01:33:56,229 --> 01:33:54,719
exactly why

2995
01:33:57,669 --> 01:33:56,239
you know why you're upset about that i

2996
01:33:58,870 --> 01:33:57,679
said i know it makes sense to put a sign

2997
01:34:00,229 --> 01:33:58,880
that they just won't let us do it she's

2998
01:34:01,750 --> 01:34:00,239
like well i just think that's really

2999
01:34:03,030 --> 01:34:01,760
stupid and i'm glad she just keeps going

3000
01:34:04,470 --> 01:34:03,040
on and on and on and

3001
01:34:06,470 --> 01:34:04,480
i just kept really calm and just kind of

3002
01:34:08,149 --> 01:34:06,480
like gazed at her kind of like i would

3003
01:34:08,950 --> 01:34:08,159
gaze at my friend during a psychedelic

3004
01:34:10,470 --> 01:34:08,960
experience

3005
01:34:11,590 --> 01:34:10,480
and i remember as she's like getting

3006
01:34:12,070 --> 01:34:11,600
crazy she's like you know they put that

3007
01:34:13,510 --> 01:34:12,080
down there

3008
01:34:15,350 --> 01:34:13,520
that she stopped she goes uh she thought

3009
01:34:17,910 --> 01:34:15,360
she looks at me she smiles she goes

3010
01:34:19,270 --> 01:34:17,920
you're doing a great job and i was like

3011
01:34:21,430 --> 01:34:19,280
thank you

3012
01:34:23,350 --> 01:34:21,440
it was like like she got it and so i

3013
01:34:25,750 --> 01:34:23,360
felt like i i do i feel like my

3014
01:34:27,350 --> 01:34:25,760
psychedelic experiences

3015
01:34:28,550 --> 01:34:27,360
helped me become more forgiving with

3016
01:34:30,149 --> 01:34:28,560
other people going through their own

3017
01:34:31,830 --> 01:34:30,159
psychedelic experiences

3018
01:34:33,350 --> 01:34:31,840
so i told my i told my friend uh like

3019
01:34:34,709 --> 01:34:33,360
one of my friends that like she said her

3020
01:34:36,229 --> 01:34:34,719
best friend was pregnant

3021
01:34:37,590 --> 01:34:36,239
and she was acting really strange i said

3022
01:34:39,189 --> 01:34:37,600
well why don't you just let her go

3023
01:34:40,470 --> 01:34:39,199
through sweet she's having a psychedelic

3024
01:34:41,750 --> 01:34:40,480
experience right now and she doesn't

3025
01:34:43,350 --> 01:34:41,760
know how to handle all of it

3026
01:34:44,950 --> 01:34:43,360
this is she's pregnant there's all kinds

3027
01:34:46,070 --> 01:34:44,960
of things going so just you know just

3028
01:34:47,669 --> 01:34:46,080
guide her through it don't take it

3029
01:34:49,430 --> 01:34:47,679
personal whatever she says

3030
01:34:51,510 --> 01:34:49,440
and she's like all right i'll try that

3031
01:34:52,149 --> 01:34:51,520
approach she's just having a psychedelic

3032
01:34:54,629 --> 01:34:52,159
experience

3033
01:34:58,310 --> 01:34:54,639
and that's that's what i think it is

3034
01:35:01,990 --> 01:35:00,550
you know i had a similar experience what

3035
01:35:05,750 --> 01:35:02,000
you were describing

3036
01:35:06,470 --> 01:35:05,760
um so this was during one of one of my

3037
01:35:11,669 --> 01:35:06,480
times when i

3038
01:35:15,990 --> 01:35:14,229
i guess maybe i i could tell tell it now

3039
01:35:19,270 --> 01:35:16,000
i guess there's better time than any

3040
01:35:21,109 --> 01:35:19,280
um one of these times now that

3041
01:35:22,709 --> 01:35:21,119
everyone would know i was referred to

3042
01:35:24,310 --> 01:35:22,719
you as my friend but now i didn't know

3043
01:35:27,109 --> 01:35:24,320
who this friend is

3044
01:35:27,669 --> 01:35:27,119
um so you had come over and we had our

3045
01:35:30,709 --> 01:35:27,679
our

3046
01:35:31,990 --> 01:35:30,719
trip right and you know with sosa

3047
01:35:34,070 --> 01:35:32,000
mushrooms

3048
01:35:35,669 --> 01:35:34,080
well you didn't know where else you were

3049
01:35:36,470 --> 01:35:35,679
gonna leave it so he's like hey can i

3050
01:35:38,390 --> 01:35:36,480
leave this

3051
01:35:40,070 --> 01:35:38,400
stuff with you you know with you and i'm

3052
01:35:40,629 --> 01:35:40,080
like sure i mean got the whole house to

3053
01:35:42,950 --> 01:35:40,639
myself

3054
01:35:44,070 --> 01:35:42,960
no kids nobody's gonna get into it you

3055
01:35:47,669 --> 01:35:44,080
know and

3056
01:35:51,109 --> 01:35:47,679
this was like a lot it was like a bag

3057
01:35:54,310 --> 01:35:51,119
of just a lot of mushrooms

3058
01:35:56,229 --> 01:35:54,320
and i was like okay so you had

3059
01:35:58,310 --> 01:35:56,239
you know you left everyone else left and

3060
01:36:00,310 --> 01:35:58,320
so this was two days later

3061
01:36:02,070 --> 01:36:00,320
i don't know what i'm obviously talking

3062
01:36:03,109 --> 01:36:02,080
about one of those things was just like

3063
01:36:04,550 --> 01:36:03,119
it i would i'd

3064
01:36:05,990 --> 01:36:04,560
i'm not using i don't want to use the

3065
01:36:06,709 --> 01:36:06,000
word possess but there was something

3066
01:36:10,310 --> 01:36:06,719
like a

3067
01:36:12,870 --> 01:36:10,320
a drive within me that just says

3068
01:36:14,550 --> 01:36:12,880
let's just take the whole bag you know

3069
01:36:15,990 --> 01:36:14,560
there's no idea why i thought they were

3070
01:36:18,310 --> 01:36:16,000
like let's just take the whole bag

3071
01:36:19,430 --> 01:36:18,320
you know and so i think but he's going

3072
01:36:21,750 --> 01:36:19,440
to be pissed you know

3073
01:36:22,790 --> 01:36:21,760
it's like it's like i basically took up

3074
01:36:24,229 --> 01:36:22,800
his whole stash

3075
01:36:25,669 --> 01:36:24,239
and i was like i'll just pay him i'll

3076
01:36:28,229 --> 01:36:25,679
just pay him back and it'll be fine he

3077
01:36:32,149 --> 01:36:28,239
can get more everything will be okay

3078
01:36:35,030 --> 01:36:32,159
you know and so then basically

3079
01:36:36,550 --> 01:36:35,040
i just started eating it and eating i

3080
01:36:38,709 --> 01:36:36,560
ate up the whole bag

3081
01:36:39,990 --> 01:36:38,719
right and i'm just sitting there and i'm

3082
01:36:42,790 --> 01:36:40,000
just like

3083
01:36:43,669 --> 01:36:42,800
yeah nothing's going to happen yeah that

3084
01:36:47,270 --> 01:36:43,679
was my mind

3085
01:36:50,470 --> 01:36:47,280
mindset i was like yeah bull you know

3086
01:36:54,390 --> 01:36:50,480
and so as i was you know basically

3087
01:36:56,790 --> 01:36:54,400
sitting there this slowly it starts

3088
01:36:57,910 --> 01:36:56,800
winding up you know but but that time i

3089
01:36:59,830 --> 01:36:57,920
was already in bed

3090
01:37:00,950 --> 01:36:59,840
thinking nothing's going to be happening

3091
01:37:04,870 --> 01:37:00,960
and so

3092
01:37:08,629 --> 01:37:04,880
i was just basically it's just

3093
01:37:12,550 --> 01:37:08,639
i think it got me the closest

3094
01:37:15,350 --> 01:37:12,560
that i could say to death

3095
01:37:16,950 --> 01:37:15,360
that i can that i can remember because

3096
01:37:19,669 --> 01:37:16,960
you know

3097
01:37:21,270 --> 01:37:19,679
at this point it was after my hawaiian

3098
01:37:22,950 --> 01:37:21,280
baby woodrow of seeds where i had the

3099
01:37:26,070 --> 01:37:22,960
near-death experience

3100
01:37:27,510 --> 01:37:26,080
and so this was like very much like on

3101
01:37:30,550 --> 01:37:27,520
that verge

3102
01:37:31,750 --> 01:37:30,560
right but it was to a point to where all

3103
01:37:33,350 --> 01:37:31,760
these other things that i've been

3104
01:37:35,189 --> 01:37:33,360
learning from bashar at that time were

3105
01:37:38,229 --> 01:37:35,199
kind of like being conveyed to me

3106
01:37:41,109 --> 01:37:38,239
about how we actually time

3107
01:37:42,870 --> 01:37:41,119
is happening by us shifting our reality

3108
01:37:45,189 --> 01:37:42,880
billion times a second

3109
01:37:46,229 --> 01:37:45,199
and so by us doing that shift at the

3110
01:37:48,470 --> 01:37:46,239
shift after shift

3111
01:37:50,070 --> 01:37:48,480
creates this illusion of time and

3112
01:37:53,510 --> 01:37:50,080
passage of time

3113
01:37:54,149 --> 01:37:53,520
you know and so that was going through

3114
01:37:57,830 --> 01:37:54,159
my head

3115
01:38:01,350 --> 01:37:57,840
was trying to

3116
01:38:03,430 --> 01:38:01,360
to kind of adjust myself but hand i mean

3117
01:38:05,109 --> 01:38:03,440
i moved my hand and there was like a

3118
01:38:06,790 --> 01:38:05,119
bazillion hands there

3119
01:38:08,709 --> 01:38:06,800
that moved my head and the hand again

3120
01:38:10,229 --> 01:38:08,719
and then the same hand was there

3121
01:38:12,229 --> 01:38:10,239
and i was like doing all kinds of till

3122
01:38:14,070 --> 01:38:12,239
my vision was basically just blurred up

3123
01:38:16,790 --> 01:38:14,080
with a whole bunch of my hands

3124
01:38:18,149 --> 01:38:16,800
and each of one of the individual frames

3125
01:38:21,270 --> 01:38:18,159
was left behind

3126
01:38:21,990 --> 01:38:21,280
of from the origin to to you know

3127
01:38:25,830 --> 01:38:22,000
wherever it

3128
01:38:27,910 --> 01:38:25,840
ended up at and so that was interesting

3129
01:38:29,350 --> 01:38:27,920
to have a visual of that but then again

3130
01:38:30,870 --> 01:38:29,360
it was one of those examples where i

3131
01:38:33,750 --> 01:38:30,880
wasn't necessarily

3132
01:38:37,270 --> 01:38:33,760
seeing with my with my eyes i could see

3133
01:38:39,270 --> 01:38:37,280
the reality i'm in but there was another

3134
01:38:40,629 --> 01:38:39,280
experience you know to be had well

3135
01:38:42,870 --> 01:38:40,639
anyway that then

3136
01:38:44,390 --> 01:38:42,880
it got so deep i it i think it's gonna

3137
01:38:45,830 --> 01:38:44,400
take me like another two three hours to

3138
01:38:48,070 --> 01:38:45,840
explain that experience but

3139
01:38:48,870 --> 01:38:48,080
i'm just going to skip forward to to

3140
01:38:52,149 --> 01:38:48,880
make a point

3141
01:38:56,070 --> 01:38:52,159
to what uh rick was saying um

3142
01:38:56,629 --> 01:38:56,080
so rick you know what was interesting is

3143
01:38:59,830 --> 01:38:56,639
that

3144
01:39:00,950 --> 01:38:59,840
i the next day i was so still very much

3145
01:39:04,550 --> 01:39:00,960
in touch

3146
01:39:06,870 --> 01:39:04,560
with this aspect that

3147
01:39:08,470 --> 01:39:06,880
of oneness and this is something that

3148
01:39:09,189 --> 01:39:08,480
that i don't know we haven't gotten into

3149
01:39:10,629 --> 01:39:09,199
very much

3150
01:39:12,229 --> 01:39:10,639
but it's like that we're that we're

3151
01:39:16,950 --> 01:39:12,239
basically all one

3152
01:39:20,149 --> 01:39:16,960
you know and as i was you know

3153
01:39:22,310 --> 01:39:20,159
having that driving to work right

3154
01:39:24,950 --> 01:39:22,320
and that you know it was like this

3155
01:39:28,629 --> 01:39:24,960
understanding that

3156
01:39:32,790 --> 01:39:28,639
all my experiences all my family members

3157
01:39:34,790 --> 01:39:32,800
all my friends everything is within

3158
01:39:36,550 --> 01:39:34,800
and so as i was driving to work i was

3159
01:39:37,430 --> 01:39:36,560
like well then what is the point of me

3160
01:39:39,750 --> 01:39:37,440
trying to go out

3161
01:39:40,870 --> 01:39:39,760
there to make contact with the person

3162
01:39:43,669 --> 01:39:40,880
just contact

3163
01:39:44,709 --> 01:39:43,679
you know get in touch with the with this

3164
01:39:47,669 --> 01:39:44,719
you know with

3165
01:39:49,189 --> 01:39:47,679
nathan with my part that is nathan with

3166
01:39:50,950 --> 01:39:49,199
my part that is rick

3167
01:39:52,310 --> 01:39:50,960
and everyone else that i know just get

3168
01:39:54,310 --> 01:39:52,320
in touch there

3169
01:39:55,830 --> 01:39:54,320
and i don't have to traverse through any

3170
01:39:58,310 --> 01:39:55,840
space through any kind of

3171
01:39:59,510 --> 01:39:58,320
challenges or difficulties just get in

3172
01:40:01,590 --> 01:39:59,520
touch there

3173
01:40:03,750 --> 01:40:01,600
and so i was still kind of very much

3174
01:40:05,350 --> 01:40:03,760
going through that as i'm going to work

3175
01:40:06,229 --> 01:40:05,360
i'm entering the building i'm scanning

3176
01:40:09,030 --> 01:40:06,239
my id

3177
01:40:10,390 --> 01:40:09,040
and i'm set down in my cubicle so my

3178
01:40:12,390 --> 01:40:10,400
boss she came to me

3179
01:40:14,470 --> 01:40:12,400
and i was at my desk and and she's like

3180
01:40:16,790 --> 01:40:14,480
yeah and i turned around

3181
01:40:17,590 --> 01:40:16,800
and she was basically like in the middle

3182
01:40:19,750 --> 01:40:17,600
of like just

3183
01:40:21,350 --> 01:40:19,760
rambling on and on about something about

3184
01:40:22,149 --> 01:40:21,360
what i needed to do because i had just

3185
01:40:24,629 --> 01:40:22,159
gotten there

3186
01:40:26,550 --> 01:40:24,639
or whatever and so i'm i'm looking at

3187
01:40:27,669 --> 01:40:26,560
her i'm partially recently listening to

3188
01:40:30,310 --> 01:40:27,679
what she's saying

3189
01:40:31,669 --> 01:40:30,320
but part of me like you know was still

3190
01:40:33,669 --> 01:40:31,679
working that out

3191
01:40:35,990 --> 01:40:33,679
and i was like well she's also a part of

3192
01:40:36,950 --> 01:40:36,000
my reality and so i just went within and

3193
01:40:39,350 --> 01:40:36,960
i just said

3194
01:40:40,310 --> 01:40:39,360
hi the second i said that she stopped

3195
01:40:44,390 --> 01:40:40,320
talking

3196
01:40:46,390 --> 01:40:44,400
and she's staring at me

3197
01:40:48,390 --> 01:40:46,400
and i'm just smiling but staring back at

3198
01:40:50,149 --> 01:40:48,400
her and she's like

3199
01:40:51,669 --> 01:40:50,159
i have no idea what i was saying i don't

3200
01:40:54,870 --> 01:40:51,679
know why i just stopped

3201
01:40:56,709 --> 01:40:54,880
you know it was like you know like just

3202
01:40:58,950 --> 01:40:56,719
just kind of stopped in the tracks you

3203
01:41:00,870 --> 01:40:58,960
know but to have that correlation of the

3204
01:41:01,910 --> 01:41:00,880
second i just kind of got in touch and i

3205
01:41:04,550 --> 01:41:01,920
just like hi

3206
01:41:06,550 --> 01:41:04,560
it immediately saw a response you know

3207
01:41:07,189 --> 01:41:06,560
and there was that the the the heaviest

3208
01:41:09,350 --> 01:41:07,199
connection

3209
01:41:11,270 --> 01:41:09,360
that i felt during that time because

3210
01:41:13,510 --> 01:41:11,280
obviously over the periods of time

3211
01:41:14,390 --> 01:41:13,520
you know your you you kind of get out of

3212
01:41:16,390 --> 01:41:14,400
it you

3213
01:41:17,510 --> 01:41:16,400
then eat some food you take some water

3214
01:41:19,510 --> 01:41:17,520
in and all that

3215
01:41:20,870 --> 01:41:19,520
other stuff happens so anyway rick i'm

3216
01:41:23,910 --> 01:41:20,880
just kind of um

3217
01:41:24,390 --> 01:41:23,920
it's not exactly the same but similar to

3218
01:41:27,189 --> 01:41:24,400
where

3219
01:41:29,030 --> 01:41:27,199
i was having an effect on my outside

3220
01:41:29,990 --> 01:41:29,040
world based on my or based on my

3221
01:41:31,990 --> 01:41:30,000
understanding

3222
01:41:33,030 --> 01:41:32,000
you know do you understand what i'm

3223
01:41:35,350 --> 01:41:33,040
saying rick

3224
01:41:36,470 --> 01:41:35,360
yeah 100 i think it does and it's like

3225
01:41:37,990 --> 01:41:36,480
it's why like

3226
01:41:39,750 --> 01:41:38,000
when somebody says like wow you know

3227
01:41:41,669 --> 01:41:39,760
you're a really unique person

3228
01:41:43,270 --> 01:41:41,679
it's like no it's just i learned i got a

3229
01:41:44,149 --> 01:41:43,280
new perspective and i learned something

3230
01:41:47,430 --> 01:41:44,159
that maybe

3231
01:41:48,950 --> 01:41:47,440
people aren't equipped with and

3232
01:41:50,950 --> 01:41:48,960
i think you learned the same thing like

3233
01:41:52,950 --> 01:41:50,960
it's it's kind of profound there's

3234
01:41:55,270 --> 01:41:52,960
definitely great things to be had

3235
01:41:56,390 --> 01:41:55,280
and learned from from psychedelic

3236
01:41:58,470 --> 01:41:56,400
experiences and i think

3237
01:41:59,669 --> 01:41:58,480
they should be looked at as teachers you

3238
01:42:01,750 --> 01:41:59,679
know not

3239
01:42:02,870 --> 01:42:01,760
not a party it's not it's not a party

3240
01:42:04,950 --> 01:42:02,880
and it's not

3241
01:42:05,990 --> 01:42:04,960
like nathan said like do i recommend

3242
01:42:08,070 --> 01:42:06,000
that people go do

3243
01:42:09,270 --> 01:42:08,080
psychologics i don't know i mean i don't

3244
01:42:10,070 --> 01:42:09,280
think it's good for everybody

3245
01:42:11,590 --> 01:42:10,080
necessarily

3246
01:42:14,709 --> 01:42:11,600
it's you just need to decide if it's

3247
01:42:15,270 --> 01:42:14,719
right for you and i don't know well i

3248
01:42:17,910 --> 01:42:15,280
think

3249
01:42:19,189 --> 01:42:17,920
it has to be purposeful in my opinion it

3250
01:42:21,430 --> 01:42:19,199
has to have a purpose

3251
01:42:22,870 --> 01:42:21,440
you know because all of us we weren't i

3252
01:42:26,550 --> 01:42:22,880
know we had fun

3253
01:42:27,270 --> 01:42:26,560
you know but we weren't uh like i can't

3254
01:42:29,189 --> 01:42:27,280
even say

3255
01:42:30,629 --> 01:42:29,199
irresponsibly because based on when

3256
01:42:32,790 --> 01:42:30,639
everyone listens to our stories they're

3257
01:42:34,790 --> 01:42:32,800
like that is totally irresponsible

3258
01:42:36,709 --> 01:42:34,800
but at least we were not playing with

3259
01:42:38,870 --> 01:42:36,719
other people's lives

3260
01:42:40,629 --> 01:42:38,880
whatever was going on i i don't know if

3261
01:42:42,070 --> 01:42:40,639
you guys would agree like we all did it

3262
01:42:44,550 --> 01:42:42,080
for our own reasons on our

3263
01:42:46,310 --> 01:42:44,560
own time you know and yes it involved

3264
01:42:48,229 --> 01:42:46,320
other people but in the sense of

3265
01:42:49,750 --> 01:42:48,239
we got their attention but they were not

3266
01:42:52,790 --> 01:42:49,760
in danger

3267
01:42:53,510 --> 01:42:52,800
going through was only going through for

3268
01:42:57,189 --> 01:42:53,520
you

3269
01:42:58,870 --> 01:42:57,199
golf a bit worse would have happened it

3270
01:43:00,629 --> 01:42:58,880
would have only happened to you

3271
01:43:02,470 --> 01:43:00,639
you know it's not like we were like hey

3272
01:43:03,590 --> 01:43:02,480
let's you know get high and then let's

3273
01:43:06,229 --> 01:43:03,600
go drive

3274
01:43:07,030 --> 01:43:06,239
you know or or or any of the other silly

3275
01:43:09,030 --> 01:43:07,040
stuff which

3276
01:43:10,950 --> 01:43:09,040
it's just that is irresponsible that's

3277
01:43:12,950 --> 01:43:10,960
just i don't know

3278
01:43:14,390 --> 01:43:12,960
this just blows my blood you know it's

3279
01:43:14,950 --> 01:43:14,400
like if you're going to do something

3280
01:43:17,590 --> 01:43:14,960
just

3281
01:43:18,310 --> 01:43:17,600
on your own on your own time with no one

3282
01:43:21,189 --> 01:43:18,320
else around

3283
01:43:23,109 --> 01:43:21,199
you know but anyway i wanted to because

3284
01:43:25,510 --> 01:43:23,119
i was initially you know want to

3285
01:43:26,790 --> 01:43:25,520
put into my you know my two cents about

3286
01:43:27,669 --> 01:43:26,800
you know what have we learned that we

3287
01:43:30,790 --> 01:43:27,679
take him with us

3288
01:43:34,390 --> 01:43:33,830
to me it was like it was the general

3289
01:43:36,070 --> 01:43:34,400
over the

3290
01:43:38,790 --> 01:43:36,080
the period of all these different

3291
01:43:42,229 --> 01:43:38,800
journeys it was learning that

3292
01:43:45,189 --> 01:43:42,239
it's everything is one everything is

3293
01:43:45,990 --> 01:43:45,199
basically this one being that it's

3294
01:43:49,350 --> 01:43:46,000
experiencing

3295
01:43:52,310 --> 01:43:49,360
itself um throughout

3296
01:43:54,149 --> 01:43:52,320
time and space and it's it created

3297
01:43:55,430 --> 01:43:54,159
itself into everything that it could

3298
01:43:57,669 --> 01:43:55,440
possibly be

3299
01:43:58,629 --> 01:43:57,679
you know it's the rocks it's the chairs

3300
01:44:00,550 --> 01:43:58,639
it's the air

3301
01:44:02,310 --> 01:44:00,560
it's everything we're part of it it's

3302
01:44:06,229 --> 01:44:02,320
part of us you know

3303
01:44:08,310 --> 01:44:06,239
and this because

3304
01:44:09,590 --> 01:44:08,320
this is the as i said before like this

3305
01:44:12,790 --> 01:44:09,600
is a game

3306
01:44:15,430 --> 01:44:12,800
is that everyone else is here to

3307
01:44:17,830 --> 01:44:15,440
to serve you to on your journey and

3308
01:44:19,510 --> 01:44:17,840
basically be a reflection back to you

3309
01:44:21,510 --> 01:44:19,520
of whatever you're doing they're

3310
01:44:22,149 --> 01:44:21,520
reflecting it to you so that you can

3311
01:44:24,950 --> 01:44:22,159
then

3312
01:44:25,590 --> 01:44:24,960
um take it and analyze it and learn from

3313
01:44:27,830 --> 01:44:25,600
it and

3314
01:44:29,030 --> 01:44:27,840
and figure some things out and so the

3315
01:44:30,709 --> 01:44:29,040
best way

3316
01:44:33,270 --> 01:44:30,719
to describe it is basically like i

3317
01:44:36,070 --> 01:44:33,280
always it then it wasn't from experience

3318
01:44:36,709 --> 01:44:36,080
just kind of my own imagination i

3319
01:44:39,189 --> 01:44:36,719
imagined

3320
01:44:40,950 --> 01:44:39,199
basically just having these buttons and

3321
01:44:43,590 --> 01:44:40,960
it's always in the heart

3322
01:44:45,189 --> 01:44:43,600
place having a button that when you i

3323
01:44:45,910 --> 01:44:45,199
guess somebody pushes it that's what

3324
01:44:47,750 --> 01:44:45,920
triggers you

3325
01:44:49,669 --> 01:44:47,760
whatever it is you know somebody says

3326
01:44:51,350 --> 01:44:49,679
something oh i'm so pissed off you know

3327
01:44:53,430 --> 01:44:51,360
then they push another button he's like

3328
01:44:56,709 --> 01:44:53,440
ah you know you're just mad about it

3329
01:44:58,550 --> 01:44:56,719
and so i was learning that

3330
01:44:59,910 --> 01:44:58,560
all these people that are in your life

3331
01:45:01,590 --> 01:44:59,920
to piss you off to

3332
01:45:03,590 --> 01:45:01,600
to what we generally consider to be

3333
01:45:07,270 --> 01:45:03,600
negative

3334
01:45:09,750 --> 01:45:07,280
they're there to to show you to say hey

3335
01:45:11,510 --> 01:45:09,760
friend you have a button there that me

3336
01:45:14,470 --> 01:45:11,520
you know that i can push

3337
01:45:16,550 --> 01:45:14,480
look into it why why is it that's there

3338
01:45:18,950 --> 01:45:16,560
if you pissed off why why are you pissed

3339
01:45:21,030 --> 01:45:18,960
off analyze it it requires a lot of work

3340
01:45:22,709 --> 01:45:21,040
but once you figure it out that button

3341
01:45:24,950 --> 01:45:22,719
almost kind of like turns off

3342
01:45:26,310 --> 01:45:24,960
and doesn't it's not active so that next

3343
01:45:27,830 --> 01:45:26,320
time they come around they're like let

3344
01:45:28,310 --> 01:45:27,840
me push your buttons and you're just

3345
01:45:31,590 --> 01:45:28,320
like

3346
01:45:33,270 --> 01:45:31,600
it's it's malfunctioned you know and so

3347
01:45:35,430 --> 01:45:33,280
the whole you know and that was the the

3348
01:45:37,030 --> 01:45:35,440
lessons i got from that to where

3349
01:45:38,629 --> 01:45:37,040
yes a lot of times when something

3350
01:45:40,229 --> 01:45:38,639
happens i'm like that you

3351
01:45:41,750 --> 01:45:40,239
know i will get pissed off or whatever

3352
01:45:43,590 --> 01:45:41,760
but then i immediately stop

3353
01:45:45,990 --> 01:45:43,600
and i go back and i'm like i have this

3354
01:45:47,990 --> 01:45:46,000
tool set that i can now use to say

3355
01:45:49,350 --> 01:45:48,000
all right this person said this this

3356
01:45:52,149 --> 01:45:49,360
person did this

3357
01:45:53,109 --> 01:45:52,159
you know it made me mad and now i can go

3358
01:45:55,830 --> 01:45:53,119
like why

3359
01:45:57,830 --> 01:45:55,840
what is it that made me react that way

3360
01:45:58,229 --> 01:45:57,840
and so i understand not everyone does

3361
01:45:59,750 --> 01:45:58,239
this

3362
01:46:01,910 --> 01:45:59,760
they have their reasons why they don't

3363
01:46:02,950 --> 01:46:01,920
do it but for me it's like i'm only here

3364
01:46:05,430 --> 01:46:02,960
as adnan

3365
01:46:07,030 --> 01:46:05,440
uh one time in this lifetime and it's

3366
01:46:08,629 --> 01:46:07,040
like why wouldn't i make that part of my

3367
01:46:10,550 --> 01:46:08,639
journey trying to figure that out

3368
01:46:11,990 --> 01:46:10,560
why wouldn't i you know you know some

3369
01:46:14,629 --> 01:46:12,000
people spend

3370
01:46:15,990 --> 01:46:14,639
um and i love soccer so i don't mean to

3371
01:46:17,430 --> 01:46:16,000
say this in a negative way

3372
01:46:19,669 --> 01:46:17,440
i mean some people spend a lifetime

3373
01:46:21,750 --> 01:46:19,679
chasing after a ball

3374
01:46:23,990 --> 01:46:21,760
if you really break it down it's grown

3375
01:46:25,750 --> 01:46:24,000
ass man chasing after a ball

3376
01:46:28,390 --> 01:46:25,760
and and then they get pat themselves on

3377
01:46:30,310 --> 01:46:28,400
the back of who kicks the ball the best

3378
01:46:31,510 --> 01:46:30,320
right i mean really when you when you

3379
01:46:34,550 --> 01:46:31,520
break it down

3380
01:46:37,109 --> 01:46:34,560
in that way you know it's like it's

3381
01:46:38,629 --> 01:46:37,119
you know and so the to them it's a

3382
01:46:39,590 --> 01:46:38,639
source of pride so i was like well why

3383
01:46:41,990 --> 01:46:39,600
can't i

3384
01:46:43,590 --> 01:46:42,000
do the same where i actually not only

3385
01:46:45,510 --> 01:46:43,600
will it help me but then

3386
01:46:47,590 --> 01:46:45,520
my friends would benefit from it you

3387
01:46:49,189 --> 01:46:47,600
know because then they will ask me and i

3388
01:46:50,790 --> 01:46:49,199
was like well i don't know if this would

3389
01:46:52,070 --> 01:46:50,800
apply to you but this is how i dealt

3390
01:46:54,470 --> 01:46:52,080
with my problem

3391
01:46:55,750 --> 01:46:54,480
you know and so it could help them it

3392
01:46:57,750 --> 01:46:55,760
could not i don't know

3393
01:46:58,870 --> 01:46:57,760
but that's what i got from this

3394
01:47:01,750 --> 01:46:58,880
experience overall

3395
01:47:03,109 --> 01:47:01,760
like an overall general lesson journey

3396
01:47:05,430 --> 01:47:03,119
from all these different

3397
01:47:06,950 --> 01:47:05,440
you know because it wasn't just one

3398
01:47:08,790 --> 01:47:06,960
classroom it was several different

3399
01:47:10,709 --> 01:47:08,800
classrooms teaching me different

3400
01:47:11,990 --> 01:47:10,719
different things but the very important

3401
01:47:14,550 --> 01:47:12,000
part was this

3402
01:47:15,750 --> 01:47:14,560
you know that i think everyone you know

3403
01:47:17,669 --> 01:47:15,760
in their lives can

3404
01:47:18,790 --> 01:47:17,679
can apply anyway so that's that's what i

3405
01:47:22,550 --> 01:47:18,800
got from it

3406
01:47:24,790 --> 01:47:22,560
um so

3407
01:47:26,229 --> 01:47:24,800
all right i think i think we're we've

3408
01:47:27,750 --> 01:47:26,239
been going on for a while so

3409
01:47:29,830 --> 01:47:27,760
for any of you out there if you have

3410
01:47:30,310 --> 01:47:29,840
questions please make sure you put the

3411
01:47:33,189 --> 01:47:30,320
three

3412
01:47:34,070 --> 01:47:33,199
stars um and then ask a question after

3413
01:47:36,870 --> 01:47:34,080
for a chat or

3414
01:47:38,470 --> 01:47:36,880
log into telegram and then i'll see you

3415
01:47:40,950 --> 01:47:38,480
pop up on my list and

3416
01:47:43,189 --> 01:47:40,960
you know we'll ask a question of me

3417
01:47:44,790 --> 01:47:43,199
nathan rick or all three of us so

3418
01:47:46,629 --> 01:47:44,800
we'll hang around if there's any

3419
01:47:47,830 --> 01:47:46,639
questions then of course we'll keep on

3420
01:47:50,470 --> 01:47:47,840
going answering them

3421
01:47:52,229 --> 01:47:50,480
um otherwise we were thinking about just

3422
01:47:54,070 --> 01:47:52,239
wrapping it up for today i think we

3423
01:47:55,830 --> 01:47:54,080
we shared quite a bit and i hope we gave

3424
01:47:59,350 --> 01:47:55,840
you give you

3425
01:48:02,229 --> 01:47:59,360
um a perspective three perspectives

3426
01:48:03,510 --> 01:48:02,239
on what is happening what can happen you

3427
01:48:06,709 --> 01:48:03,520
know and so

3428
01:48:07,669 --> 01:48:06,719
um i don't know maybe there's people out

3429
01:48:09,910 --> 01:48:07,679
there they're

3430
01:48:11,669 --> 01:48:09,920
sharing it more openly or not i don't

3431
01:48:14,390 --> 01:48:11,679
know but at least by

3432
01:48:16,229 --> 01:48:14,400
by us doing that it will just expand

3433
01:48:18,709 --> 01:48:16,239
your world a little bit more

3434
01:48:19,910 --> 01:48:18,719
you know so not saying or condoning that

3435
01:48:21,590 --> 01:48:19,920
you know any of this

3436
01:48:23,430 --> 01:48:21,600
we're just simply saying this is what we

3437
01:48:27,990 --> 01:48:23,440
did this is what happened to us

3438
01:48:31,830 --> 01:48:30,629
i will add there there was uh uh the the

3439
01:48:32,950 --> 01:48:31,840
one take takeaway recently because

3440
01:48:35,109 --> 01:48:32,960
actually like i said i don't

3441
01:48:36,629 --> 01:48:35,119
touch anything i guess you'd call hard

3442
01:48:38,790 --> 01:48:36,639
or serious anymore but

3443
01:48:40,550 --> 01:48:38,800
uh i do smoke weed periodically and i

3444
01:48:42,629 --> 01:48:40,560
think sometimes that that can be i think

3445
01:48:44,070 --> 01:48:42,639
it's chemically classified as a hypnotic

3446
01:48:44,310 --> 01:48:44,080
but i think sometimes it's psychedelic

3447
01:48:45,669 --> 01:48:44,320
or

3448
01:48:47,590 --> 01:48:45,679
especially if you eat enough of it if

3449
01:48:49,189 --> 01:48:47,600
you eat edibles um

3450
01:48:50,709 --> 01:48:49,199
there's just one time in bogota here

3451
01:48:53,030 --> 01:48:50,719
recently

3452
01:48:54,229 --> 01:48:53,040
that it did just bogota the laws are

3453
01:48:55,350 --> 01:48:54,239
always sometimes it's legal sometimes

3454
01:48:56,470 --> 01:48:55,360
it's not it was legal when we were there

3455
01:48:57,830 --> 01:48:56,480
the last time and you could just buy

3456
01:49:00,709 --> 01:48:57,840
edibles at a store

3457
01:49:02,070 --> 01:49:00,719
and uh it was our last night we were

3458
01:49:03,189 --> 01:49:02,080
gonna get on the plane the next day and

3459
01:49:04,470 --> 01:49:03,199
we're like well we don't know if we can

3460
01:49:05,750 --> 01:49:04,480
take these or not you know the laws are

3461
01:49:07,430 --> 01:49:05,760
weird everywhere so we just started

3462
01:49:09,030 --> 01:49:07,440
eating these cookies and i think the the

3463
01:49:11,189 --> 01:49:09,040
shop owner said i don't know take one

3464
01:49:12,950 --> 01:49:11,199
bite maybe share one cookie between you

3465
01:49:14,950 --> 01:49:12,960
and we ate like eight cookies between my

3466
01:49:17,109 --> 01:49:14,960
wife and i um

3467
01:49:18,870 --> 01:49:17,119
it became pretty psychedelic and i think

3468
01:49:20,229 --> 01:49:18,880
the big and the other takeaway and even

3469
01:49:21,750 --> 01:49:20,239
when i just smoked a little bit now it's

3470
01:49:23,910 --> 01:49:21,760
uh not only just the oneness of

3471
01:49:25,669 --> 01:49:23,920
everything but that the time is now

3472
01:49:27,669 --> 01:49:25,679
so like for some reason that's very

3473
01:49:29,270 --> 01:49:27,679
important to me recently the time is now

3474
01:49:30,950 --> 01:49:29,280
like now is a very important time in

3475
01:49:34,149 --> 01:49:30,960
human history i guess or in the

3476
01:49:36,950 --> 01:49:34,159
awakening process of us all and uh

3477
01:49:38,070 --> 01:49:36,960
it's the time is now like get up do it

3478
01:49:39,990 --> 01:49:38,080
if you're gonna try it

3479
01:49:41,430 --> 01:49:40,000
try it we're not condoning it if you're

3480
01:49:42,470 --> 01:49:41,440
if you're not if you have something

3481
01:49:43,510 --> 01:49:42,480
you've been wanting to do that you think

3482
01:49:44,870 --> 01:49:43,520
will help people

3483
01:49:47,030 --> 01:49:44,880
if you want to write a book if you want

3484
01:49:49,669 --> 01:49:47,040
to start a website if you want to

3485
01:49:50,629 --> 01:49:49,679
act if you want to uh you know start a

3486
01:49:52,550 --> 01:49:50,639
company do it now

3487
01:49:55,669 --> 01:49:52,560
like we have a short period of time here

3488
01:49:57,109 --> 01:49:55,679
and and make it your best enjoy it

3489
01:49:58,790 --> 01:49:57,119
and really there's there's you don't

3490
01:50:01,910 --> 01:49:58,800
fail if you don't give up

3491
01:50:04,070 --> 01:50:01,920
so just keep moving forward rick

3492
01:50:07,350 --> 01:50:04,080
what about you do you have any uh uh

3493
01:50:13,589 --> 01:50:11,350
um yeah i don't know i was trying to

3494
01:50:17,430 --> 01:50:13,599
think if i had any of those

3495
01:50:18,950 --> 01:50:17,440
um no not really i mean

3496
01:50:21,270 --> 01:50:18,960
no i don't i think i actually agree with

3497
01:50:23,109 --> 01:50:21,280
nathan you know the the time

3498
01:50:24,390 --> 01:50:23,119
everything comes down to the time is now

3499
01:50:26,070 --> 01:50:24,400
because like

3500
01:50:28,229 --> 01:50:26,080
you know at the end of the day like you

3501
01:50:30,310 --> 01:50:28,239
i do believe you write your own history

3502
01:50:31,830 --> 01:50:30,320
um uh you know actually what i was going

3503
01:50:32,950 --> 01:50:31,840
to say actually this would be a good

3504
01:50:34,950 --> 01:50:32,960
closing statement like

3505
01:50:36,709 --> 01:50:34,960
you know when it came to the the fact

3506
01:50:37,589 --> 01:50:36,719
where i had the experience of oh you

3507
01:50:39,910 --> 01:50:37,599
know like

3508
01:50:41,109 --> 01:50:39,920
we could tell we could we could use

3509
01:50:43,030 --> 01:50:41,119
telepathy to talk

3510
01:50:44,229 --> 01:50:43,040
potentially that's kind of maybe we can

3511
01:50:46,790 --> 01:50:44,239
maybe we can't i don't know

3512
01:50:47,990 --> 01:50:46,800
but if that were possible you know and

3513
01:50:49,910 --> 01:50:48,000
we're in this stage of like

3514
01:50:51,910 --> 01:50:49,920
talking then like why are we talking oh

3515
01:50:53,189 --> 01:50:51,920
because i like talking and i think well

3516
01:50:54,950 --> 01:50:53,199
you know like

3517
01:50:56,390 --> 01:50:54,960
kind of like how a child has to go

3518
01:50:58,390 --> 01:50:56,400
through that phase in their life where

3519
01:51:00,629 --> 01:50:58,400
they like to really play with their toys

3520
01:51:02,070 --> 01:51:00,639
you know we as a collective society or

3521
01:51:03,669 --> 01:51:02,080
as human beings have to go through a

3522
01:51:04,390 --> 01:51:03,679
series of trials too like obviously

3523
01:51:06,149 --> 01:51:04,400
we're not

3524
01:51:08,310 --> 01:51:06,159
nearly as barb well i guess that could

3525
01:51:09,990 --> 01:51:08,320
be debated are we as barbaric as we used

3526
01:51:11,669 --> 01:51:10,000
to be i don't know

3527
01:51:13,510 --> 01:51:11,679
i think it seems like things were pretty

3528
01:51:14,709 --> 01:51:13,520
nasty you know 500 years ago i think

3529
01:51:16,709 --> 01:51:14,719
things are a lot better now

3530
01:51:18,070 --> 01:51:16,719
that's what i think um but i feel like

3531
01:51:19,750 --> 01:51:18,080
these are these are periods

3532
01:51:21,589 --> 01:51:19,760
even as a collective we have to grow

3533
01:51:23,350 --> 01:51:21,599
through so you know we

3534
01:51:24,870 --> 01:51:23,360
we make the choice as to when we're done

3535
01:51:26,310 --> 01:51:24,880
with the experience that we need and

3536
01:51:27,669 --> 01:51:26,320
then we move on to the next experience

3537
01:51:29,830 --> 01:51:27,679
when we're ready for it

3538
01:51:31,669 --> 01:51:29,840
so like you know we can talk we can

3539
01:51:32,870 --> 01:51:31,679
watch videos of people doing karate or

3540
01:51:34,070 --> 01:51:32,880
whatever but at the end of the day you

3541
01:51:35,669 --> 01:51:34,080
have to walk the walk

3542
01:51:37,270 --> 01:51:35,679
and you have to make your choice as to

3543
01:51:38,709 --> 01:51:37,280
when you want to make a change and it's

3544
01:51:40,709 --> 01:51:38,719
completely up to you

3545
01:51:41,830 --> 01:51:40,719
and the universe doesn't necessarily

3546
01:51:45,109 --> 01:51:41,840
care what you do with it

3547
01:51:46,790 --> 01:51:45,119
that's that's up to you so that's my

3548
01:51:48,070 --> 01:51:46,800
takeaway from it you you have the power

3549
01:51:50,070 --> 01:51:48,080
to do what you want to do

3550
01:51:51,830 --> 01:51:50,080
um people are presented obviously with

3551
01:51:53,750 --> 01:51:51,840
different challenges in their lives

3552
01:51:55,189 --> 01:51:53,760
you know some people don't have all

3553
01:51:56,550 --> 01:51:55,199
their limbs for example

3554
01:51:58,229 --> 01:51:56,560
we're not it's not an equal playing

3555
01:52:00,629 --> 01:51:58,239
field but

3556
01:52:01,669 --> 01:52:00,639
we are here to play the game and the

3557
01:52:03,350 --> 01:52:01,679
time is now

3558
01:52:05,030 --> 01:52:03,360
and we have stuff to learn from each

3559
01:52:06,390 --> 01:52:05,040
other that's what it's all about that's

3560
01:52:09,430 --> 01:52:06,400
what i think

3561
01:52:10,390 --> 01:52:09,440
nathan thank you very much again i i

3562
01:52:12,629 --> 01:52:10,400
really appreciate it

3563
01:52:14,870 --> 01:52:12,639
i'm glad we were able we were able to do

3564
01:52:18,149 --> 01:52:14,880
this and um

3565
01:52:21,430 --> 01:52:18,159
you know i i think it's time for

3566
01:52:22,790 --> 01:52:21,440
basically us just not to hide anymore

3567
01:52:23,669 --> 01:52:22,800
about these different type of things

3568
01:52:25,589 --> 01:52:23,679
because

3569
01:52:27,350 --> 01:52:25,599
if anything even if you don't go down

3570
01:52:28,149 --> 01:52:27,360
this route there's still something to be

3571
01:52:30,310 --> 01:52:28,159
learned

3572
01:52:32,709 --> 01:52:30,320
you know thank you thank you for being

3573
01:52:34,149 --> 01:52:32,719
here too there is a great question

3574
01:52:35,350 --> 01:52:34,159
i don't know if you if you have time to

3575
01:52:37,830 --> 01:52:35,360
answer it looks like there's a question

3576
01:52:40,310 --> 01:52:37,840
that came in

3577
01:52:41,510 --> 01:52:40,320
it wasn't so much of a i can ask it but

3578
01:52:44,390 --> 01:52:41,520
uh you know

3579
01:52:46,070 --> 01:52:44,400
we're off sync again like you know the

3580
01:52:48,229 --> 01:52:46,080
audio and video so

3581
01:52:49,350 --> 01:52:48,239
but i guess i am recording so maybe i

3582
01:52:53,189 --> 01:52:49,360
can

3583
01:52:54,820 --> 01:52:53,199
i said if um

3584
01:52:56,950 --> 01:52:54,830
this is from from

3585
01:52:59,510 --> 01:52:56,960
[Music]

3586
01:53:01,430 --> 01:52:59,520
fab 22 we'll just take this one and then

3587
01:53:03,109 --> 01:53:01,440
we'll make it quits because

3588
01:53:05,910 --> 01:53:03,119
otherwise it's gonna be off sync way

3589
01:53:08,629 --> 01:53:05,920
more and it just would be unwatchable

3590
01:53:09,589 --> 01:53:08,639
but yeah so this is from fab 22 says if

3591
01:53:11,270 --> 01:53:09,599
you could find a

3592
01:53:13,430 --> 01:53:11,280
natural way to access the part of

3593
01:53:16,060 --> 01:53:13,440
consciousness you are looking to

3594
01:53:18,629 --> 01:53:16,070
link would you then move away from

3595
01:53:21,910 --> 01:53:18,639
[Music]

3596
01:53:24,229 --> 01:53:21,920
psy substances well

3597
01:53:25,189 --> 01:53:24,239
personally yes i always talked about

3598
01:53:26,390 --> 01:53:25,199
that once you've been on these

3599
01:53:29,430 --> 01:53:26,400
frequencies you

3600
01:53:30,790 --> 01:53:29,440
don't you realize you don't need

3601
01:53:32,550 --> 01:53:30,800
you know something like that you can

3602
01:53:35,270 --> 01:53:32,560
just through meditation

3603
01:53:35,990 --> 01:53:35,280
and and just focus of just remembering

3604
01:53:37,830 --> 01:53:36,000
again

3605
01:53:39,669 --> 01:53:37,840
what it felt like being on that

3606
01:53:41,270 --> 01:53:39,679
frequency and you will be there once

3607
01:53:42,629 --> 01:53:41,280
you're there that's when information

3608
01:53:44,790 --> 01:53:42,639
comes in and flows

3609
01:53:46,709 --> 01:53:44,800
so then you you don't need it you know

3610
01:53:49,830 --> 01:53:46,719
i've always i've always said that

3611
01:53:50,229 --> 01:53:49,840
i think you know every time i do a show

3612
01:53:53,189 --> 01:53:50,239
but

3613
01:53:55,910 --> 01:53:53,199
you know what would you say about that

3614
01:53:59,189 --> 01:53:55,920
yeah absolutely i think

3615
01:54:00,709 --> 01:53:59,199
um maybe actually that's why i uh had

3616
01:54:01,270 --> 01:54:00,719
that last experiences that was so

3617
01:54:04,390 --> 01:54:01,280
intense

3618
01:54:05,030 --> 01:54:04,400
was to uh sort of snap me out because

3619
01:54:06,550 --> 01:54:05,040
maybe i was

3620
01:54:07,750 --> 01:54:06,560
you know because maybe i stopped looking

3621
01:54:08,950 --> 01:54:07,760
at them as tools because i think almost

3622
01:54:10,229 --> 01:54:08,960
every time we've ever done this we've

3623
01:54:12,950 --> 01:54:10,239
always looked at it

3624
01:54:13,669 --> 01:54:12,960
very respectfully as a tool for a

3625
01:54:17,270 --> 01:54:13,679
purpose

3626
01:54:18,470 --> 01:54:17,280
and and but none's right as soon as

3627
01:54:20,470 --> 01:54:18,480
you've you've achieved certain

3628
01:54:21,990 --> 01:54:20,480
vibrations uh and

3629
01:54:23,270 --> 01:54:22,000
and you don't even need that tool to get

3630
01:54:24,470 --> 01:54:23,280
there there's there's always natural

3631
01:54:26,470 --> 01:54:24,480
ways i mean uh

3632
01:54:27,830 --> 01:54:26,480
and by naturally you don't i'm sure the

3633
01:54:31,109 --> 01:54:27,840
question doesn't mean

3634
01:54:33,270 --> 01:54:31,119
uh lsd versus psilocybin mushrooms

3635
01:54:34,950 --> 01:54:33,280
it means meditation versus psilocybin

3636
01:54:37,910 --> 01:54:34,960
mushrooms are all psychedelics so

3637
01:54:38,709 --> 01:54:37,920
yes absolutely that we if once you can

3638
01:54:40,310 --> 01:54:38,719
do that you

3639
01:54:41,990 --> 01:54:40,320
you should and you should practice it

3640
01:54:45,669 --> 01:54:42,000
regularly rick

3641
01:54:47,589 --> 01:54:45,679
what about you um

3642
01:54:49,350 --> 01:54:47,599
i think i think the question about

3643
01:54:49,990 --> 01:54:49,360
natural actually kind of like roots

3644
01:54:51,030 --> 01:54:50,000
itself into

3645
01:54:52,790 --> 01:54:51,040
i mean because like for example

3646
01:54:53,589 --> 01:54:52,800
mushrooms are natural you know they're

3647
01:54:55,189 --> 01:54:53,599
food

3648
01:54:57,589 --> 01:54:55,199
you know so i mean if you look at it as

3649
01:54:58,950 --> 01:54:57,599
like a food and not a drug it kind of

3650
01:55:00,790 --> 01:54:58,960
looks a bit different we all know that

3651
01:55:02,629 --> 01:55:00,800
it has a different effect on you but

3652
01:55:03,830 --> 01:55:02,639
i sometimes wonder like and i don't know

3653
01:55:05,350 --> 01:55:03,840
if this is a like

3654
01:55:06,790 --> 01:55:05,360
this is where the question is coming

3655
01:55:07,990 --> 01:55:06,800
from but sometimes like this question

3656
01:55:09,669 --> 01:55:08,000
actually comes up

3657
01:55:11,430 --> 01:55:09,679
by a lot of people like you know well if

3658
01:55:13,189 --> 01:55:11,440
you can do it from through meditation

3659
01:55:15,510 --> 01:55:13,199
would you want to move away from it and

3660
01:55:17,030 --> 01:55:15,520
like i i personally like i think there's

3661
01:55:18,470 --> 01:55:17,040
more than one way to get there and i

3662
01:55:19,830 --> 01:55:18,480
think practicing meditation i need to

3663
01:55:21,430 --> 01:55:19,840
practice meditation actually i've been

3664
01:55:23,750 --> 01:55:21,440
told that my whole life

3665
01:55:26,070 --> 01:55:23,760
i have attention deficit issues you know

3666
01:55:29,189 --> 01:55:26,080
but i i don't see necessarily

3667
01:55:30,950 --> 01:55:29,199
what's wrong with taking like like like

3668
01:55:32,950 --> 01:55:30,960
if you use it responsibly or you treat

3669
01:55:34,470 --> 01:55:32,960
it respectfully or like if you looked at

3670
01:55:36,070 --> 01:55:34,480
like this like this guy that i spoke

3671
01:55:37,350 --> 01:55:36,080
with that i didn't talk about this but i

3672
01:55:38,310 --> 01:55:37,360
spoke with a guy in the airport

3673
01:55:40,070 --> 01:55:38,320
yesterday

3674
01:55:41,990 --> 01:55:40,080
um that was in the army for you go ahead

3675
01:55:43,750 --> 01:55:42,000
mention it quickly yeah it was really

3676
01:55:45,830 --> 01:55:43,760
quickly he he was in the army for seven

3677
01:55:47,750 --> 01:55:45,840
years and he suffers from ptsd and he

3678
01:55:49,189 --> 01:55:47,760
turned to psychedelic therapy

3679
01:55:51,109 --> 01:55:49,199
uh and he said it saved it he used

3680
01:55:52,870 --> 01:55:51,119
ketamine it saved his life and he

3681
01:55:54,629 --> 01:55:52,880
says he you know used mushrooms like

3682
01:55:55,750 --> 01:55:54,639
responsively and he told me he said i

3683
01:55:57,830 --> 01:55:55,760
really believe

3684
01:55:58,870 --> 01:55:57,840
that if we use this and we approach this

3685
01:56:00,950 --> 01:55:58,880
responsibly

3686
01:56:02,950 --> 01:56:00,960
that stuff like psilocybin for example

3687
01:56:03,750 --> 01:56:02,960
could be considered the antibiotic for

3688
01:56:05,669 --> 01:56:03,760
our brains

3689
01:56:06,790 --> 01:56:05,679
you know and and i think he's right

3690
01:56:08,310 --> 01:56:06,800
about that so like

3691
01:56:09,830 --> 01:56:08,320
i don't know if it should be a matter of

3692
01:56:10,870 --> 01:56:09,840
like should we be moving away from

3693
01:56:12,950 --> 01:56:10,880
psychedelics i

3694
01:56:13,990 --> 01:56:12,960
i don't see why necessarily we would

3695
01:56:16,470 --> 01:56:14,000
need to move away from

3696
01:56:18,390 --> 01:56:16,480
them if we can find that you know if

3697
01:56:20,149 --> 01:56:18,400
taken in small doses or you know kind of

3698
01:56:21,189 --> 01:56:20,159
like you don't want to eat too much salt

3699
01:56:23,030 --> 01:56:21,199
or too much meat

3700
01:56:24,550 --> 01:56:23,040
you want to have a balanced diet if this

3701
01:56:26,229 --> 01:56:24,560
could be something that's included in

3702
01:56:27,510 --> 01:56:26,239
our diet we realize that maybe too many

3703
01:56:29,030 --> 01:56:27,520
psilocybin mushrooms

3704
01:56:31,189 --> 01:56:29,040
aren't necessarily good for you but a

3705
01:56:32,149 --> 01:56:31,199
little bit of them are you know it would

3706
01:56:34,390 --> 01:56:32,159
just be considered

3707
01:56:36,310 --> 01:56:34,400
a part of cleaning up her brain so i

3708
01:56:37,510 --> 01:56:36,320
don't think all psychedelics necessarily

3709
01:56:39,910 --> 01:56:37,520
can be treated equally

3710
01:56:40,870 --> 01:56:39,920
either just like we have different fats

3711
01:56:42,550 --> 01:56:40,880
so i think there's

3712
01:56:44,629 --> 01:56:42,560
more research that needs to go into it

3713
01:56:46,790 --> 01:56:44,639
so we kind of understand them better but

3714
01:56:48,709 --> 01:56:46,800
i don't see necessarily that it's a

3715
01:56:49,270 --> 01:56:48,719
necessity that we have to move away from

3716
01:56:50,709 --> 01:56:49,280
them

3717
01:56:52,390 --> 01:56:50,719
because we can also achieve it through

3718
01:56:53,589 --> 01:56:52,400
meditation i don't see why the two can't

3719
01:56:55,669 --> 01:56:53,599
necessarily

3720
01:56:57,350 --> 01:56:55,679
coexist i guess that's what i'm saying

3721
01:57:00,070 --> 01:56:57,360
all right thank you for that

3722
01:57:01,750 --> 01:57:00,080
well nathan rick thanks again everyone

3723
01:57:04,709 --> 01:57:01,760
else watching i appreciate it

3724
01:57:05,350 --> 01:57:04,719
um again i will upload a much cleaner

3725
01:57:07,510 --> 01:57:05,360
version

3726
01:57:09,109 --> 01:57:07,520
uh meaning that the video and audio is

3727
01:57:11,109 --> 01:57:09,119
going to be in sync

3728
01:57:12,550 --> 01:57:11,119
but you'll be able to re-watch this

3729
01:57:13,189 --> 01:57:12,560
whole thing again if you're interested

3730
01:57:14,790 --> 01:57:13,199
to

3731
01:57:16,470 --> 01:57:14,800
hear the silliness and journeys we've

3732
01:57:18,149 --> 01:57:16,480
been on so uh

3733
01:57:20,629 --> 01:57:18,159
again thank you all very much for

3734
01:57:23,109 --> 01:57:20,639
watching i thank nathan for being in

3735
01:57:25,270 --> 01:57:23,119
the studio and very first guest in the

3736
01:57:27,669 --> 01:57:25,280
studio rick i'm sorry you couldn't

3737
01:57:29,430 --> 01:57:27,679
have been here with us in person but you

3738
01:57:32,629 --> 01:57:29,440
know i'm glad you were able to join

3739
01:57:36,070 --> 01:57:32,639
on on telegram so um

3740
01:57:38,390 --> 01:57:36,080
yeah we'll we'll basically um next week

3741
01:57:41,910 --> 01:57:38,400
i'll be back on wednesday at 7 pm

3742
01:57:43,350 --> 01:57:41,920
uh to do open lines after that i think i

3743
01:57:46,070 --> 01:57:43,360
already have a guest scheduled but i

3744
01:57:48,149 --> 01:57:46,080
won't mention it until next week so

3745
01:57:49,350 --> 01:57:48,159
again everyone thanks very much have a